Franciose:
In this instance the only thing that the Mom, alamb has done 'wrong' is leaving the Borg. I am thinking (just my own thought) that in this case, the fact that the girls being asked which parent they wanted to go with, (a great thing in most cases) backfired.
Usually children will choose who they are happiest with. But can you imagine the terror in a young, childish mind if you believe that God is going to kill you if you're at Mommy's house and not Daddy's when Armaggedon comes?! That Mommy has demons in her mind just because she believes the Bible differently than Daddy?
You may say that kids are smart, that they can see through that kind of manipulation. But I share custody of a very bright five and a half year old with my JW ex, and she comes home spouting more WT garbage all the time, something new every week (he gets her on weekends)
It takes me and my husband all week to make a dent in what my ex drills into her by taking her to meetings and in service Saturday AND Sunday (they actually arranged a Saturday bookstudy at my Uncle's house so that my ex could bring my daughter to two meetings in a row!)
She begs him not to make her go to meetings two days in a row, asks to do something else with him instead, but he says that they "have no choice because it's what Jehovah wants."
She told me before that she couldn't believe that God would kill me at Armaggedon because I'm a "good Mommy, and so sweet and kind to her." She sees, at times, how clearly her Dad is trying to manipulate her. On other days, though, she has anxiety and panic thinking that all the non-JW relatives that she loves will die shortly at the hands of Loving God. Especially her mom.
In alamb's case: the father failed to meet the court's requirement to sign an affadavit stating that he would not teach the children to shun their mother. So at least for now, they are with their mother, where they belong.
I definitely believe that there are good fathers out there who get screwed (pardon the language) by the system. I have been told that I was stupid for allowing my ex to have joint custody. I didn't want to spend the rest of my life in court.
But alamb's situation is totally different. If you read the rest of the thread and saw her answers to earlier questions, I hope you can better understand the situation now.
My best
Essie
P.S. Note to alamb and all, I'll be away from the computer most of this weekend. Eyestrain. Love ya'll!