Their is a difference in spanking and abuse.
My siblings and I were beat!!!! sometimes to the point of bleeding!!! My brother once was beat because he forgot to stir the "beans" and they burned, he had open bleeding sore on his back from that one. My legs were always bruised from pinches at the kingdumb hall for falling asleep, or not paying attention!
My children were spanked, when needed and I did not have to spank for everything or anything. Example: when my oldest son was 1 1/2 he thought it was cute to slap me in the face, I told him no and he laughed. He did it again and I swatted him on his thigh and said no, do not hit mommy! in a firm tone. He stopped!
I don't remember any of my children needing a spanking after say age 2-3, neither did I have to endure a child that threw temper tantrums, talked back, hit, punched, kick or spit at me or any adult!
I could go out in public without fear that my child would embarrass me, or would I have to leave because of their misbehavior.
nj