Posts by garybuss

28

YES!!!!!! Shunning has backfired!!

by Dawn in

jw
friends

i was df'd a number of years ago.

my parents never shunned me - they didn't feel that df'ing broke the family ties.

but when my brothers or uncle were in town i was "allowed" to come visit at certain times when their other jw friends would not be around.

garybuss

DE wrote: <But what really aggrivates me is that they will have these big BBQ's or parties when family comes into town, invite all their JW friends.......AND MY SON AND HUSBAND (never a JW) - but I'm not invitied. >

If my relatives or anybody invited me to anything and informed me my wife was not welcome I would tell them to go screw themselves. Then I would start to shun them. This kind of crap pisses me off.

Sorry you have had to go through that kind of treatment. You do not say if your husbamd joined your relatives in shunning you. Hope he did not.

Glad your son is showing some human decency. Sounds like a nice kid.

gb

47

Were you ashamed of being a witness?

by sleepy in

jw
friends

were you ashamed of being a witness?.

how did you feel about identifing yourself as a jehovahs witness to others?.

i often used to hide it because of the stigma attacthed to it.. was anyone actually proud to be one?

garybuss

I did not like being forced at be an agent for the Watch Tower Corporation and I hid that fact that I was a Jehovah's Witness every chance I got. At school, at the door Saturday mornings, and with neighborhood friends.

I did try to believe and I did try to want to want to be a Jehovah's Witness but I just did not like it and I was not at all proud to be one and I did try to hide it.

Gone since 1974 and glad . . . and I AM proud to be a EX-JW.

gb

The Way I See it http://www.freeminds.org/buss/buss.htm

13

JW's not identifying themselves?

by DanielHaase in

jw
friends

i had a visit this morning from a couple of older sisters from a local congregation that i'm not terribly familiar with (i don't live in the territory for the congregation that i was raised in).

anyway, i didn't have the balls or energy to question them about the usual things (recent dateline, etc.

) because they were these sweet little old black sisters that really reminded me of the witnesses at the beginning of "friday".

garybuss

They are not proud of who they are and who they represent. Their parent Corporation knows they are not at all respected and instructs recruiters to hide who they represent.

The current case issue before the United States Supreme Court centers around anonymity. The Society does not want members to have to give their names or reveal who they are representing .

I believe once they register as agents for the Watch Tower Corporation in writing, agency is established and the Watch Tower Corporation is responsible legally. My guess is this has much farther implications than a mere proselytizing permit.

I predict there will be new light as to agency and who recruiters represent when they are working for the Watch Tower Corporation. The new light will be this: When in service or anyway representing the Watch Tower Corporation, members will be instructed to indicate they are representing themselves and not the Watch Tower Corporation. They most likely will have to sign a release form.

This will be in the same spirit as the donation arrangement adopted after the Watch Tower Corporation lost it's quest in helping Jimmy Swaggert at the California Supreme Court.

Comments?

gb

The Way I See it http://www.freeminds.org/buss/buss.htm

29

Support forum for those abused in WTS

by Lady Lee in

over the last few weeks a lot of people have come forward and posted stories of abuse while they were jws.

these often were experiences as a child victim or a wife at the hands of an abusive husband.

the forums are open to active jws and those who have left.

garybuss

Lady Lee what is dissociative disorders? Can you give me an example?

Thanks, gb

14

did I miss the point

by DanTheMan in

sometimes i wonder if the legalism and the authoritarianism in the wt have a purpose that i intuitively understood at first, and that somehow i've become blinded of the necessity of those things.. two things keep entering my mind - .

1. jesus likened his followers to sheep, and;.

2. the israelites got tired of the manna.. in leaving the wt, am i like the israelites who complained about the "contemptible bread"?

garybuss

dantheman wrote: <The world is nuts, and it seems like things are ready to explode.>

That's just on TV danth. In reality the world is just as it has always been. Just watch the animals. They go about their business without anxiety or fear of impending doom.

I worked on a house this week where the 60ish widow living there just had to go on disability due to bad health. She sits home most days and she told me that she is bored shitless. She would love some nuts and explosions but for most like me and her, the world keeps turning and will keep turning long after we are gone.

A few people are sick, a few are paranoid, and few are probably nuts. But the world is fine. Religion and politics keep wars and turmoil in the news but the media's job is to select, sensationalize, and deliver world events produced as drama and edited with flair to sell laundry detergent and automobiles and home computers.

I know more than a few people who think they are bothered by world events when they are really just bothered by watching / reading commercial media.

Then again, I may be wrong and the world may be nuts and ready to explode.

gb

The Way I See it http://www.freeminds.org/buss/buss.htm

5

What damage does being a witness do to our brains?

by sleepy in

jw
friends

hello sleepy .

celtic mark here deep down sw of westcountry.

i'm sure that the damage inflicted on those ones brought up in the trooth is perhaps greater than those who did not experience being brought up in it.

garybuss

Sleepy wrote: <Will this ever go away?> For me it has not. I have challenged my core beliefs and checked my behaviors but my essential personality is a 1950's era Jehovah's Witness.

This has not been a good thing for me but it is a reality. I want to plan for the future but my mind is trained to think in Apocalyptic patterns. I like people but I was trained to either hate them or distrust them without any rational reason.

I wrote an article on this a while back titled Establishing and maintaining the Pseudopersonality
posted on line at http://www.freeminds.org/buss/pseudopersonality.htm

Here is a short quote from my article:

A popular book, Cults in our Midst, By Margaret Thaler Singer (with Janja Lalich), Chapter 12, p. 302: Recovery; Coming out of the Pseudopersonality, contains these two sentences:

". . . I will explore . . . a kind of peeling off of the outer layer of identity that was taken on while in the cult. The process is a matter of recovering one's self and one's value system, and of keeping whatever good was learned during cult days while discarding all the not-so-good."

While this onion peel approach is interesting and I'm sure it applies to some individuals, maybe many individuals, it avoids the masses who were indoctrinated into these groups as children or as adolescents who had no other personality, no other training, and no other world views. The constant repetition of the group's world view became the core beliefs of the individual. Not an "outer layer". Not a pseudo-personality. The groups beliefs and practices made up the core of the predominant operating force of the young member. The human body became the person and beliefs plus experiences became the personality.End quote.

Sleepy wrote: <I often find that I have to tell my mind to think differently than what it automatically wants to.>

This is normal for COWs (Children Of Witnesses). For me it has been a life long journey. The hardest part for me was the awareness that I had a flawed pattern of thought processing. That was a breakthrough.

Sleepy wrote: <So are those who are brought up as witnesses in a strong witness household , but who lack intellegence trapped in the way they have been taught to think from birth unable to modify their thinking and realise the "truth" aint so true?>

In my opinion, yes. I look at my father. Raised by Witness/IBSA parents, baptized into the group in 1935 at age 15, he has refused to look at disconfirming experiences and information all his life. He has had to discount an enormous amount of material and experiences. The religion he loves today is nothing at all the same as it was in 1935 when he was baptized. He has accepted the writings of the Society 100% all this time. He thinks there is a god and he directs this book publishing business and he no doubt still thinks Armageddon will come and validate him before he dies. He still continues active in the group into his 80's having dispensed with me long ago.

It's a done deal. He will stay till he dies and our last conversation will remain forever unfinished. And all those like him will stay because they can not leave. They lack the ability and the resources.

He thinks there is something wrong with me because I question things and I took off the blinders and read and learned. They don't realize they are limited and often we don't realize they are limited. We leave. That puts us on a collision course with them. Eventually we collide and become enemies to various degrees.

Often they are needy in some way but they block pragmatic help from us out of their superstition and ignorance and fear. They won't accept love from us and they become unlovable. Needy, ignorant, unlovable and dying in a working delusion.

Great thinking Sleepy. Great topic! Thanks! gb

The Way I See it http://www.freeminds.org/buss/buss.htm

21

A Sister Speaks Out!

by silentlambs in

jw
friends

the following is a letter i recieved to day on the silentlambs email.

it seems brothers and sisters are becoming more willing to speak out on this matter.

silentlambs

garybuss

Apparently she didn't have a problem with children dying for lack of blood medical treatment for the last 40 years or so. Or with broken families due to the shunning practice. Or with a pyramid of failed predictions and broken promises.

Oh well!

13

Anybody see the July 1 2002 WT?

by Lieu in

if anyone has read the study articles...exactly what did you think?

my take on the matter: all of the "great crowd of other sheep" are now being equated to the 'foreigners' of isaiah's prophesy.the 'gb' now thinks they are actually zion instead of being sons of zion which explains their thinking they are the "mother" and not the sons.but they are also the sons of zion....or earthly sons...but also zion...but wtf?if the gb are = to zion which is = to jah's woman, then they actually think they are = to jah...and are not the bride of christ (son) but have the audacity to think they could be the bride of jah (father).a reiteration of the 1919 stupid thing runs rampant throughout the article....can't we just stop with the dates fellas?!!

!they think they (gb) have been repurchased by jah .... not by christ and his blood who is supposed to be thier husbandly ownerthey try and rationalise why the congregational election of elders stopped...instead of telling the truth of why it stopped.. i have come to the conclusion that the gb does not acknowledge anything christ did, nor the fact that the 'annointed' are suposed to make up the 'bride of christ'.

garybuss

Lieu wrote: <cigar, smoking money mongering, drunkard. >

I can see Rutherford dealing in money, we all do to a degree. I can accept testimoney that he drank alcohol and maybe was dependant on it. But I have seen no proof that he smoked anything.

Do you have the proof that he smoked? If you do, then please share it with us. It will be the first I have seen and will deserve it's own thread. If you don't, then I think writing as though you do, detracts from the issue.

gb

24

Help get this JW off my back!

by mpatrick in

jw
friends

i was wondering if anyone wanted to come to my defense on this jw discussion board at http://www.beliefnet.org this jw that post as "rosemaybud" is driving me crazy and i am tired of trying to get her off my back.

she never post about anything much, except to make hateful remarks to me or about me.

i post as "loveofwaterlilies".

garybuss

Hi mpatrick

Looks to me like the JW is the one who needs help. :-)

gb

32

Finding out Who you really are

by Sentinel in

good morning everyone,.

i'm very new on here--just "born yesterday", as a matter of fact, but am finding out how wonderful it is to be able to be free to express thoughts and opinions, share ideas, give comfort, and find hope, within "these walls".. i'm going to ask a question, and that is, how long did it take any of you souls out there to find your true self, after leaving jw's?

i was very young when i was first introduced to the studies of jw's.

garybuss

Karen, you wrote: <the more I pondered over "the truth", the more I realized that "it just wasn't". >

I carried the delusion with me for about 18 years as a believing walkaway.

You wrote: <My first husband chose suicide>

My first wife committed a form of suicide by refusing chemo treatments for the leukemia that ravaged her because the chemo required blood medical support.

You wrote: <When I say that I don't judge people, it means that I leave them to themselves,>

I knew that:-)

Later

gb

The Way I See it http://www.freeminds.org/buss/buss.htm