I was totally disgusted when I discovered what JW funerals were all about. I had never gone to one while I was a JW, so had no idea what I was up against when I did go.
You hit the nail on the head and the term "infomercial" is THE PERFECT way to describe JW funerals.
My experience with JW infomercial funeral came when my Dad died in Dec 2001. He had been zealous in the truth for years and a elder, special pioneer etc and then he saw what was going on and he just up and quit the "truth". So he was unofficially DA for 25 years. My Mom was totally still in and insisted that we give him a JW funeral. I said OK but not at the Kingdom Hall so she agreed to that thank Goodness and we had the service at the Funeral Parlour. She didn't object I think because she wasn't sure if my Dads funeral would have been allowed at the sacred Hall anyway. Then she talked Ernie Funk from Canada Bethel to give the talk as he and my parents went way back to the 50's in the truth together. My husband and I decided to do a Eulogy for my Dad (thankfully) and I did a collage of photos of his life and family. I was not experienced with funerals so just trusted that things would be to say good bye to my Dad and talk about him.
So the funeral began and I had my children there, my exhusband, My current husband at that time and friends of my childrens family and some of our business colleages there (all who were not JW's and some not knowing about them).. Well were we in for a shock, It was a total infomercial, and my fathers name was maybe mentioned 2 times but it was like we weren't there about him. Scripture after Scripture and a lot of them subtlly referring to the fact that my Dad might not have a resurrection hope. I was so embarrassed and bored. My Mom sat beside me, not a tear in her eye and she was so happy having A Bethel Brother giving a talk for her husband. She had her bible and looked up every scripture as he read them. I was so disgusted. After Ernies talk he introduced my husband and said he would give a Eulogy, Well that was all about my Dad and he did a good job. Afterward a lot of people even JW's came up and complimented Robert on his Eulogy, and a lot said that if it hadn't been for the Eulogy we wouldn't have know we were there about my Dad.
One more thing...When I told my Mom that I wanted to do a Eulogy for my Dad but that Robert my husband would give it as he was a good speaker she said she would have to check with Ernie to see if that is OK. Unbelievable, its her husband and she is paying for the funeral and she has to ask the Bethel God if her daughter can give a Eulogy. Well I didn't make a big fuss but I was seething inside. I had to speak to him (Mr. Holier than thou Ernie) on the phone at my Moms and he instructed me what I couldn't say. I had to fax the Eulogy over to Ernie at Bethel and wait for him to critique it. He had told me we couldn't say any thing religious against the JW's or say that he might go to heaven. I told him he didn't need to worry my husband and I are not religious so its going to be all about my DAD. He approved the thing but Geeeeeesh I just thought it was absolutely crazy.
Ok now I got that off my chest and I feel better too that I wasn't the only one that had to go throught this kind of fiasco.
My Mom died in October 2006. I am the only child and was exector so I arranged the funeral. I let the JW's give the talk but I told them that NO WAY would they do all that scriptures stuff. I said talk about my MOM and I gave him a limit of 2 scriptures. He did it and it was very nice funeral talk. It was nice to be in control for a change with them.
Thanks for listening
Velvetann
