Blasty

Joined

• started 4 topics
• posted 104 times   see topics posted on
• send a message

Posts by Blasty

• 
  9

  Dealing with my girlfriend's family.

  by Dune in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  i've been with my girlfriend for about 4 months and she has a big family who are always around.

  they are nice people, and i get along with them fine.

  they now want to meet my family and have even given an ultimatum that if they don't meet a family member within a month, they'll 'make' her break up with me.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Blasty

  Well, I'd be mad first of all. But does your girlfriend support this ultimatium crap? I'd imagine she'd be pretty pissed at her family for stepping in like that.

  But hey, if you want to be around this family, you need to let them know who you are on no uncertain terms. Tell them "I'm dating your daughter, not my family". If you don't deal with your family very often, let them know. "Hey, me and my family aren't on the greatest terms."

  Until I met my wife, my family didn't like a single girl I went out with hehe. She may have that type of family too hehe.
• 
  20

  Saw my dad last night...

  by tall penguin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a few weeks ago i had a conversation with my mother (still a jw).

  she told me that one of my fave elders, who was disfellowshipped a few months before i disassociated three years ago, just got reinstated.

  now, to know my mother is to know that she doesn't give you information unless she has an underlying motive.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Blasty

  You know what Tall_Penguin, I read your account, and It makes me wonder where I'll be as a parent when my kids are out on their own.

  I think I was about 8 when I realized my parents aren't very good parents at all. Which isn't something a kid at 8 should end up concluding, but I'm 30 now, and I realize, they really sucked. My grandparents raised me mostly, and they did good, and surely earned more of my love then my parents.

  But the hard part is, as a child to parent relationship, I never realized a strong unconditonal love for any of them. I love my grandparents dearly, but not even in the ballpark of my Parent to child relationship I have for my children. So I guess I wonder if I'll be able to control myself when I'm older, and not intervene in their lives. My children are 5 and 3 now....so I have plenty of time heh, but it still makes me wonder.

  How hard will it be to let go, and let them lead their own lives? Hopefully I at least won't be subversive or manipulative.
• 
  51

  Are You a Glass Half Full Type Person ? Optimist or Pessimist ?

  by flipper in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  we've all heard the cliches .

  " when the going get's tough, the tough get going .

  " etc., etc., ...... " better to have loved and lost .... than never loved at all.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Blasty

  85% of the time, I'm a glass half full person. I always think everything will work out in the end.

  But I do hear myself sometimes refer to a situation as a guaranteed 'fak over" situation. Which isn't very half full of me at all hehe.
• 
  12

  And she walked out of thier lives... forever

  by teflon in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i walked away.

  faded, actually, without knowing that was what i was doing.

  i just got tired of all the crap.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Blasty

  Welcome

  Well, you have a lot to work out there, but maybe if I can tell you why I celebrate christmas now, it will help you.

  First, we all know the reason JW don't celebrate christmas, and all it's "pagan" origins. But when it gets down to it, does it really matter where something came from? I honestly believe it doesn't. I think what matters is how you use it, and what it means to you.

  Pagans long dead have no influence over me, people alive today have little to no influence over me. So why should there choices, and there ideas change the meaning I put into what I do today? This argument can go for or against christmas actually. Why should you follow a tradition just because others do it.

  Well, for me, it's a matter of deciding what Christmas means to me. It's a time to be giving, and a time to appreciate everything you've been given. It's a time to gather together, love one another, and be happy about life and it's meaning.

  Why do it on a specific day? Well, for one, it's really hard to do something right if you don't plan for it. Secondly, why not? If we throw off the chains others have placed on it, what is wrong with it? What's wrong with sharing a good feeling with those around you? There is a common good-will present in many people around that time, it's a good thing.
• 
  3

  Questions on the changes?

  by Blasty in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so, i haven't attended a jw meeting in 11-12 years.

  what is this new light?

  and what did they change about the book studies?.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Blasty

  So, I haven't attended a JW meeting in 11-12 years. What is this new light? And what did they change about the book studies?

  I haven't had a debate with any of my family over anything, but I'd hate to be "caught with my pants down" on their current subjects. I've heard references to these things, but no real explanation of what it is.
• 
  57

  The elders came last night and i stood my NEW ground!!! be proud!

  by New light for you in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so yes, the brothers came for "encouragement" and of course, my husband is out of town on business... so it was me and the kids.. so i did let them in, i like these brothers...these are some things we discussed.... 1. i went over how that stupid "obey" email got all this started, got me to divulge to my girlfriend how i was feeling about the whole religion.

  about how at the end of the call she said that she can't associate with me anymore, and then right after that call/ 30seconds later while i'm crying a pioneer called and asked "do you consider yourself one of jeh witnesses anymore??

  " and i thought that was crazy for someone to try to trap me when i was sitting crying on the phone, upset with the last call... i told them that for all purposes i am already dfed since noone will talk to me anymore, and only one friend called to see what happened, everyone else just listened to the gossip of whatever spread, and wrote me off even though i'm technically in good standing.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Blasty

  Glad you stood your ground.
• 
  8

  An Open Letter from a PO to active JWs

  by iloowy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hey.

  i came across this open letter from a po to jw's in good standing.

  eventhough it was written in 1976 a lot of the material in it is still a good source of info to get jw's thinking about beliefs.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Blasty

  scroll to the end and read the last paragraph of that pdf, guess it's page 28?
• 
  12

  The folks went out of town to the Russian District Convention.

  by Lady Zombie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when the iron curtain fell in the 90's, my parents went to russia with a group of other jws.

  since then, they've taught themselves russian and now go over about every 3rd year.

  they also work the russian territory here once a month and spend about 10 hours traveling around in a 100 mile radius.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Blasty

  Ahh, well I'll try not to be too nosy, or is it nosey? I can't spell.

  Most of the people that would keep tabs on me live in a different state, so I'm not sure if people just assume or what. Of course, I haven't been to a meeting in about 12 or 11 years. So either people assume a lot about me, or just gave up on me heh.

  Well, on the bright side, I guess it's good that your parents still care. I saw my grandparents shun my mom for years, as a child I could never understand it. And now as a parent I completely don't understand it.
• 
  12

  The folks went out of town to the Russian District Convention.

  by Lady Zombie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when the iron curtain fell in the 90's, my parents went to russia with a group of other jws.

  since then, they've taught themselves russian and now go over about every 3rd year.

  they also work the russian territory here once a month and spend about 10 hours traveling around in a 100 mile radius.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Blasty

  That's actually pretty cool that your parents taught themselves russian.

  I've only read a few posts from you Lady Zombie, but I wouldn't think you'd tolerate being nagged about something like meetings heh. I guess it's nice that you tolerate your parents still. I humor mine when they bother to contact me hehe.
• 
  42

  How do you know if you're in love?

  by LouBelle in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  to be honest - i've never loved anyone - i'm talking about the romatic type here.

  i have liked & been attracted to people....but love, nope.

  i have no idea how to identify it.. looking at people in "so called" love today can be a bit deceptive, as what i have seen and still see to a great extent is 2 people .

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Blasty

  Bleh I had a post for all of this but I didn't feel like itemizing it.

  A man being in love is definately different from a woman being in love. Also, love keeps redefining itself as time goes by. Ask a couple of 5 years what love is, and then a couple of 10,25,50, 65 years...ask the same question and the answers may surprise you.

  The reality of it all is that a lot of people aren't capable of falling in love with someone, since they aren't cut out to be in a relationship. The sad fact is this won't stop someone from falling in love with a person of this nature. A lot of people don't realize their own selfish nature and self-serving needs, and therefore they don't realize that they aren't cut out to be in a relationship.

  For me, I knew I was in love when I couldn't conceive of being with any other woman. To this day, I find no appeal in other women, sure they can be nice to look at, but pretty women are a dime a dozen. Good looks will never change how ugly someone is on the inside, and when you see who a person really is, then you'll know how ugly or beautiful they really are.

  I knew my wife had issues, but for the most part she is the type of woman I wanted in my life. And yes we have our issues today, but I love her and I'm willing to spend the rest of my life working on these issues. And yes, when we are 50 years into this marriage, I think we will still have issues. But that's ok.

  On the topic of love though, I thought I knew what love was. But when my children were born, I found out what true unconditional love was, it's kind of scary and amazing all at the same time.