My advice....if you are going to do a slow fade with small children make sure you encourage friendships outside of the witnesses for them. Get them involved in community sports with children that will be in their schools..have small parties after the season ends so you children will find friendships with these kids, keep in mind always that as soon as you stop being JW's you will lose every friendship you thought you had.
truthseekeriam
JoinedPosts by truthseekeriam
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44
Is a slow fade being selfish when you have kids?
by dissonance_resolved inso i got some great advice to take things very slowly with the husband and kids in order to be able to fade and still maintain contact with my parents and siblings.
but today i got a call from my son's teacher that he was having a meltdown because he was worried about all his friends and teachers being destroyed at armageddon.... first i felt like such a schmuck for ever having allowed that thought to enter my son's head, then i thought, is it psychological torture for me not to immediately correct the situation?
i had a long talk with him about how god is perfectly just and full of love and he didn't have to worry about that at all, but it still seemed lukewarm.
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Part 1 of the 2013 Conti and Simons interview now on YouTube (questions posed by JWN members)
by cedars ina while back we ran a "competition" whereby people could pose questions of candace conti and rick simons for them to answer in a video.. there were so many questions that we needed to do a series rather than just one video.
this first instalment is now on youtube.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bhvfefpig4a.
here are the questions that were answered.... (to rick, asked by "exwhyzee") is there a possibility that part of the ruling, if you overcome the appeal, will be that the society must make an announcement outlining the details of the case to its members, as well as an apology to candace?.
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truthseekeriam
Thank you.
I have much respect for all of you who are working so hard to protect children within this religion.
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Re: Will you attend the Memorial this year? Why? Why not?
by check inyou all had some interesting thoughts on that jw memorial thread.
some of you mentioned that you are going so that you can set some sort of example.
i gather that some of you believe that by going and eating, you are somehow showing them they can (or should) do it too.. that really confuses me.
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truthseekeriam
Nope, we'll be living it up in sin city that day.
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Near miss ! JW's in my neighborhood.
by LoisLane looking for Superman infrom my living room window, while i am sitting at my computer, on jw.net, a little four door car, pulled up and parked on my road.
two couples got out.
the two men, walked east to my place, but only went to the big house in front.
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truthseekeriam
I remember in the first year of our escape we would get so freaked out when the doorbell would ring! Not anymore...when they come by the TV is turned up, dogs are barking and we just look out the peephole and continue with whatever we were up to. It's nice to be finally free from power they had over us.
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just finished reading the Candace Conti court docs
by soft+gentle ini had been reading discussions on topix about the case and decided to go see what was actually said and not said during the trial.
i'm left with several indelible impressions of the courage and honesty of candace and of her mother kathleen.. another thing is that the court was given the opportunity to really get a feel for the jw lifestyle.
the close family relationships they promote which emphasizes, for me, that if the elders had been as vigilant as they said they were they would have spotted that kendrick had become alarmingly close to candace.
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truthseekeriam
When I read those court documents I made some of those same observations.
I have many complaints as to how the elders respond to having a known molester in their congregation, but my main one is how they take away the rights of every parent by not giving them the information to protect their children.
I have shared those views with my JW family and they completely agree.
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Former Elder Michael J Norris IN CUSTODY
by Tylinbrando infbi and santa barbara agents arrested michael at the airport.
he is locked up in santa barbara county jail.
he awaits bail hearing and i intend on presenting evidence to revoke his $250,000.00 bail.. thanks to everyone for your encouragement and support!.
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truthseekeriam
My daughter had just turned 11 when she took the stand and faced her molester. It was one of the hardest days of our lives but she got up there and told the truth.Yes, she left the stand in tears and it broke our hearts to she her that way...but in the end, there was a conviction and my daughter now takes great pride in knowing she helped put away a molester and in turn protected other children from becoming his next victims.
Please pass along to the brave young lady that she is my thoughts and prayers and so is her parent...they will get through it and actually come out more powerful for it.
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Barbra is singing...Memories
by LoisLane looking for Superman inam i the only one crying?.
just lois.
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truthseekeriam
Loved it!!!
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I ran into an active JW...surprised
by nolongerconfused inso as you all know, i have fully faded...i'm completely out and have not told the elders or da myself...just faded 100%.... so i run into an active jw, different congregation, and as i walk past him i say, "hey so and so, how are you doing?
"....he looks down, doesnt dare look at me in the eyeball and keeps walking...then a split second later he turns around and says, hey man, aren't yuo disfellowshipped?....
i was like wtf?...lol, i said "not that i know of"...i asked him who told him such thing?...he wouldnt tell me who, but he had "heard"...so i just left it at that and told him if he wants to know then to contact my ex-elders.... my thing is, could the elders have df'ed me without me knowing it?...i have not been accused of their so called "apostasy", nor have i received a letter requesting info or to set up a meeting, nor a call...the coordinating elder (formally president/presiding overseer) still texts me all the time saying hi etc...no religious texts or anything like that).
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truthseekeriam
I doubt they " officially" disfellowshipped you, but once you stop going they treat you as if you are
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Have you ever shunned someone and then later regretted it?
by 00DAD inlately, i've been reading a number of thread lately that deal with this topic.
one particularly poignant experience came from simon.
in simon's story he shares: .
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truthseekeriam
Personally, no. I could never bring myself to follow that rule...I would always smile and say hello.
My sister on the other hand newly baptized and with strong advice from the sister that studied with her shunned our disfellowshipped mother. It's something she deeply retreats now and has damaged their relationship even though our mother is now back in the religion.
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Sex abuse prosecution hurdles
by Tylinbrando inwhat is frustrating to me is that even if the wbts and silentlambs, attorneys and parents who have been contacted before law enforcement of sex abuse disclosures were to pick up their phones immediately and call the police to report alleged sex abuse, there is still a huge amount of hurdles to clear before an alleged abuser will be brought to justice.
investigations gathering evidence that is deemed to be prosecutable can take months.
diliberations by district attorneys before a judge can take months.
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truthseekeriam
Yeah...it does take way too long.
I know for my daughter it was worth the wait to see her abuser handcuffed and taken into custody after his conviction.