cantleave, that's exactly what happened to my husband and I. We just woke up one Sunday and didn't go...we never looked back. Of course it's easier with your spouse helping you and standing with you, I realize that. Just remembering that very feeling, almost breathless anticipation of NOT going, not ever.
Heartbreaker
JoinedPosts by Heartbreaker
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I couldn't face going
by cantleave ini was suspossed to go to the meeting today, gotta to keep up the pretense in order to facillitate my fade.
instead i had nice lie in, i visited my non-witness dad, and then met up with my first aspostate from this site mr. majestic.. i didn't want to go to the meeting because meetings make me angry, i can now see the techniques used to control the congregation by fear.
i can't stand the thought that so many good people are being fed a banquet of lies and deception.. i could so easily never attend again..
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Will there be more KH closings?
by Gayle inhttp://www.patriotledger.com/news/x686278928/marshfield-religious-landmark-up-for-sale.
with local membership declining, the congregation has merged with the kingdom hall in rockland.. .
said the two congregations recently decided to combine to be spiritually stronger ... so we can continue to do our preaching work, and take care of one another.. .
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Heartbreaker
I hope so.
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My JW Mother Asked if I Could Get Her the Yearly Information on the TMS
by OnTheWayOut inwhile i was active, i would find someone on the web that would post/share their complete reference information on the theocratic ministry school and i would print it for my mother.
it would include all the wt materials excerpted from their books for each week's school.
many people did it.
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Heartbreaker
Thanks Cattails, sure nothing corporate about that, right?
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why do I keep losing sleep over silly stuff?
by finding my way ini keep finding myself posting things on here and then feeling extremely embarrased for sharing my point of view.
like i can't handle anyone disagreeing with my viewpoint.
last night i had a hard time falling asleep because of what someone posted in response to my comment.
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Heartbreaker
Sounds to me like you are just all on edge and having too many changes (even if they are just in your heart right now) at a time.
I tell you what, I had an adrenal problem, and I'd get all shaky and nervous, then lightheaded and nauseous, and then would need to fall asleep....but I couldn't sleep at night at all, bad dreams, arguements, both sides, battling a subject out all the way....and if I faced my fears, the adreneline afterwards would leave me shaky even more, and jazzed up to where I felt like I was buzzing around. It was some crazy stuff. I can tell you what worked for me, but I knew my problem was exacerbated by adrenal lows, was take the over the counter hydrocortisone cream and put it on the inside of my arm or leg, just a tsp or two, and massaged it in. Deep breaths.
Try writing down a pros and cons list. What you are getting away from, what you are leaving behind. Sometimes they can be on both sides of the list, and there you will find your anxiety. Take it slow, and get through one thing on the list if possible at a time.
Come back here, realize we aren't here to battle you, to argue your point of view. For myself I can say that I am so damned tired of being told all my life how to think, how to answer, and what the appropriate questions are, that I never want to tell someone they are wrong and I am right ever again!!! That is the very best thing I am taking away from this whole ordeal. To each his own, and who am I to question them?
Take care of you, please....you are worth it.
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On a scale of 1 to 10
by paul from cleveland inare you at peace with your beliefs?.
1 = very anxious / confused / searching.
10 = complete peace / totally confident in belief system.
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Heartbreaker
I'm at a solid 7. Winging the rest.
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Heartbreaker
Short, sweet, and funny. Just like I like my Youtube videos. Thanks Mouthy!
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Big Surprise!!
by IronHill inso last night i'm chatting with my wife about some things i had read on this site, when she dropped a bomb on me.
see we have been attempting new non-jw friendships, to make our fade a little more bearable (in her case since she has so many jw friends).
i have been trying to do this for her and told of a few i've found here, and on facebook.
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Heartbreaker
That is so freakin cool. I would be overjoyed to find my husband here, how lucky you two are. :)
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Follow up to my saga
by Heartbreaker ini realize i'm a bit quiet here, and most if not all won't remember my story, so here is a brief synopsis.
i recently decided that i'd rather pursue life rather than a future life promised but not realized.
i was fortunate enough that my husband agreed in that he didn't want any man telling him what he had to do, or how to live, and so left with me.
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Heartbreaker
Jim, you are just too adorable, I could squeeze you! Love your outlook on it all, so down to earth. I've visited Texas and have one dear friend there, but husband is a hunter (and a gatherer) and really insists on being somewhere he can do that easily. Not sure Texas would fit that bill. Now, no flaming the hunting, we eat everything he gets. Last week we had breast of dove with a soft sauteed jalepeno inside, wrapped in bacon. Of course it was just a few nibbles for each of us, but it was DELICIOUS.
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Follow up to my saga
by Heartbreaker ini realize i'm a bit quiet here, and most if not all won't remember my story, so here is a brief synopsis.
i recently decided that i'd rather pursue life rather than a future life promised but not realized.
i was fortunate enough that my husband agreed in that he didn't want any man telling him what he had to do, or how to live, and so left with me.
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Heartbreaker
Blue - that is so sweet :) So tell me the climate of Virgina, and what the economy/living costs are like there....I'll let you tug me :)
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Follow up to my saga
by Heartbreaker ini realize i'm a bit quiet here, and most if not all won't remember my story, so here is a brief synopsis.
i recently decided that i'd rather pursue life rather than a future life promised but not realized.
i was fortunate enough that my husband agreed in that he didn't want any man telling him what he had to do, or how to live, and so left with me.
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Heartbreaker
OTWO, I appreciate your words, always a straight shooter, and I admire that. My man is very much like that :)
Billy, yes it was very clear they were not there to shepard, not even a bible in hand. They were there to collect information, and it could only be negative information...they wouldn't take that we are happy now, we just want to live a quiet life and don't associate with anyone, or share our views...they repeated the congregation needed to be kept clean and organized. Well, thanks for reducing our lives as just paperword, numbers, and a file. Such warm love. You were right on the mark about the story my mom sent too, over emotional BS, but she loves that stuff.
Whoknows...I expect to see that tree!! Good for you! Sorry you had to suffer your way out though.
readyornot, I appreciate you voicing how reading my story made you feel, that you could see the vileness in it all that it turned your stomach. Who knows, maybe my story stirred something in your too...either way, thanks for voicing your support in a post, I appreciate it. Would love to hear more from you and your experience too!