My experience was very similar to yours. If more people knew what went on behind closed doors, they would be shocked.
When in, I honestly felt some Elders didn't really believe in JG, by the way they talked about and treated others.
Coming to this site has opened my eyes to all sorts of JW misgivings. Try looking at the 'Search' function on past threads. I found it hard to not stop looking, as EACH day I found some incredible and accurate info on the WT, which will also prove conclusively, they do not have JG HS.
You have really, just begun your search.........