theme was something about "loyalty to jehovah's visible organization".. i have neither the time nor inclination to summarize the whole thing, but a few points stood out:.
even if it causes you personal hardship.
example: joshua & caleb returned from spy trip to promised land with good report, but were "outvoted" by the other 10 spies.
Soldier77 If they come right out and say, "Be loyal to visible org. even if you know they are wrong" I'm done, no slow fade, just stand up and walk out the front door.
REALLY???? THAT take cojones! If I saw that - someone just get up and storm out the Khall - my eyes would bug out and I would seriously be nosey enough to follow you and ask you WHY! That is TOO cool!!!
theme was something about "loyalty to jehovah's visible organization".. i have neither the time nor inclination to summarize the whole thing, but a few points stood out:.
even if it causes you personal hardship.
example: joshua & caleb returned from spy trip to promised land with good report, but were "outvoted" by the other 10 spies.
WOW! REading that just flashed all these different 'rules' in my mind that JWs are expected to live by and NEVER question - and it makes me so happy I'm OUT of that environment now.
there was a family in my cong that i was really close to...dad's an elder, mom's a pioneer, they had a son and daughter.
about 5yrs ago though, when i was still in my jw trance - the son married a non-jw and faded while the daughter was df'd.
due to my judgemental training, i 'shunned' both of them out of duty (not because i didn't care about them).
You are so right about how social networks DO take the 'sting' out of being DF'd. Took me a while after my announcement to realize my WORTH - cause I really believed God hated me and I wasn't worth ish....but finding an old friend that feels the SAME WAY and to know that he understand how I feel - well that makes my freedom of choice NOT to go back - worth it even more!!!
I hope your 'meet up' works out!! Sounds promising.
When I was in the hospital, some JW friends of mine that I have stayed in contact with despite my being DF'd - came to visit me. My parents were 'disgusted' by this, but held in their disdain until I was a lil better. At that point, my mom came to me and nicely told me that I needed to tell the JWs that I talk to NOT to bother with me...cause it shows disrespect by associating with those who I shouldn't be! HAHAHA! I flat out told her that I am not a JW, so I no longer HAVE to abide by THEIR rules - I can talk to whomever I choose.
i remember the day that i first found out about this teaching.
it was during a co's visit, he got up on the platform, and made it absolutely clear that the only way to get into paradise was to be a baptised jw (he had a letter from the borg saying this).
i was confused by this, and the next day i was set to work with him in the ministry.
I used to be SO SCARED when the brothers would talk about how we needed to be at ALL mtgs 'in case the end came' and nobody knew where to go or what to do. SO if you weren't at the mtg (for whatever reason) you would miss out on the direction from the bros and possibly lose your life! THAT rang loudly in my head as a kid...
there was a family in my cong that i was really close to...dad's an elder, mom's a pioneer, they had a son and daughter.
about 5yrs ago though, when i was still in my jw trance - the son married a non-jw and faded while the daughter was df'd.
due to my judgemental training, i 'shunned' both of them out of duty (not because i didn't care about them).
There was a family in my cong that I was really close to...dad's an elder, mom's a pioneer, they had a son and daughter. About 5yrs ago though, when I was still IN my JW trance - the son married a non-JW and faded while the daughter was DF'd. Due to my judgemental training, I 'shunned' both of them out of duty (not because I didn't care about them). But these 2 were SUCH good friends!! Their parents would always discuss how disappointed they were that thier kids didn't come back...and so i never really ran into either of them nor felt it would be 'acceptable' to try to contact them.
Anyhow, found BOTH of them on good ol Facebook and reached out to them. The girl friended me right away and we caught up online! But the son took awhile...so I sent him a msg telling him that I was DF'd and that if he chose not to associate with me, I would understand and respect that. WELL...he DID friend me and we ended up chatting for a LONG time last night!! Not only was he happy to hear from me, but he also said that my being DF'd was 'only by man - NOT by God' and that led into us discussing the org and how twisted it is. HE has the same feelings as we all do (here on JWN) about JWs and religion as a whole...he read CofC...we talked about all the discrepancies...and his 'hang up' is the generation topic! I told him about this site (hopefully he joins) and then we ended the convo.
All in all it was soooo good to catch up with an old friend and to be able to learn that THEY also feel just like I do!!!
do you ever feel guilty about the way you pre-judged others when you were a drone?.
i feel guilty about it every day!
people's lives are so complex, we know so little of their personal struggles and "thorns in the flesh" yet we're conditioned to prejudge on a checklist of criteria published by a few men in new york.
To this day (and I'm going on 2yrs being DF'd) I feel BAD for how I treated other DF'd people that I knew...specifically this one sister I knew. She was my best friend at the time, and we had sort of falling apart because she was older then me and was living her life. Well I ran into she and her mom in the grocery store one day and ran over to say hi...her mom told me that my friend was DF'd and then the mom started crying. I toos tarted to cry, and my friend (who was standing RIGHT there between the 2 of us) started to cry...and not ONCE did I make eye contact with her or say a word to her. I just hugged her mom IN front of her and walked away. How freakin selfish is that??? I mean, as if I had NO heart. That still bothers me.
sorry if this starts off as a kind of a downer.. i am 29, and my husband and i have stopped going to meetings since last october.
we live in mexico and used to attend the english.
long story short, after realizing how many much we've been lied to we stopped going to our meetings, moved out of the territory, switched to spanish, and after a month of attending just vanished.
WELCOME! Remeber that you ARE 'hormonal' in a sense - being pregnant and all. SO your emotions are probably stronger then normal.
On the other hand, I can relate to the ANGER at learning that all you were taught is NOT true and that admitting you don't believe anymore can and will alienate you from your entire family. It's scarey, it's frustrating, and it would make anyone angry. It's NORMAL!
...is today.
he stated to me that he really wanted me to attend the ceremony, so me and lorijis will be attending the ceremony this evening.
i dont know if we'll be ready for all of the shunning that will occur, but i want to be there and so does he.. the funny thing is we never received an invitation or anything to let us know about the wedding.
It still amazes me that dubs can shun family yet ask them for financial help.
That sounds JUST like my sister! The girl is mentally ill (besides the point) but she is exactly THAT way! This girl will not even LOOK at me if I run into her in public (she will cover my lil nieces eyes so SHE doesn't see me either) and she has flat out told me that I am DEAD to she and her daughter and that she wants nothign to do with me. But the oddest thing happens when she is in dire straights and needs money and knows my parents will give her a fat NO....all of a sudden she has no problem calling me and NEEDS me. I used to give in and let her have whatever she needed, but anymore - HELL NO!
Basically, although you are doing the noble thing - you are allowing yourself to be used. Do you realize that? I know it's your brother and that's family, but family wouldn't SHUN each other or play emotional games (you're not invited but could you contribute?) and they wouldn't allow men telling them NOT to do something to be their guide in life.
Y'all made me spit my soda all OVER my computer here at work!!! This 'ish' is hilarious!!!
in the june 15th wt it says on page 9 i will just write it out as it is to hard and unbelievable to preface this.
so here it is.. "many who today are members of the christian congregation can tell you that before learning of and adopting jehovah's righteous standards, they lived without moral restrain.
yet, they were unsatisfied and unhappy.
After leaving, I was surprised at the moral restraint of non-JWs. I thought they were accountable to know one so they did whatever. Well, they do have a sense of accountability either to their God or mankind. Overall, they are a good bunch.
So true...so true! That was the first 'surprise' I had when I finally let my guard down, stopped being such a JW snob, and started reaching out and making friends with NON-JWs - they are good people! They may not be witnesses, they may not serve Jehovah, they may not go to Khall, but they ARE clean living, moral, upstanding, tax paying citizens that follow the law and are honest and loyal. I know baptized JWs that can't even say that for themselves! My parents (at will by the religion) taught me that 'worldly' people are out there running wild with no direction and no sense of responsibility. So I was afraid of how they would act if I ever got too close. UGH!!! Now I see the real deal, and to be honest, ALL of my friends (unconditional non-JW ones of course) AND my boyfriend are better then 80% of the JWs I've ever known.
