OK, I changed my mind. If the elder is next door just hand him the letter. Your husband is the other problem tho, tell him your dilema and ask him to look at the list. Will he be supportive at all?
Your little girl is going need a long talk about how you still love God (if you do?) and feel that that the people in the organization are being misled (or whatever you feel). If she has friends at the hall you may have to consider this too. A bible study with just the Bible may help you show her where you are at. Tell her God is the judge not the elders or people. If she is a typical kid, showing her you love her and God may be enough. If she has bought into the JW she will worry that you will die at Armagedon.
Do whats best for you!
Edited for spelling