Posts by snakeface

34

I swear some JWs don't believe in forgiving and forgetting. It's like a tattooed scarlet letter.

by miseryloveselders in

jw
friends

my dad ticked me off the other night, to the point i had to hang up.

i didn't abruptly hang up, but rather i told him i had company.

we were discussing a sister at my hall who did something years ago.

snakeface

I have seen this too. Not only a past disfellowshipping but even minor things and also gossip and rumors are held against the person indefinitely and follow him/her to their next congregation.

Witnesses are conditioned to look at the bad in each person so they can tell them how much "they" (the other person) need the kingdom. Other religions teach to look for the good in others and build on it.

I knew of an elderly couple, (couple A) now deceased, who were baptized in 1950 (before I was born!) Shortly thereafter they witnessed to their friends (couple B). couple B also got baptized. Later on Couple A became inactive for many years. When I met them they had just returned and were active in the congregation, and remained so till their deaths. But behind their backs Couple B always made comments like, "Well I never fell away or had any doubts, not for one second. I was always completely faithful.." I always LOVED to use the scriptures on them (couple B) about being "faithful in what is least" and "gadding about, talking of things they ought not..."

54

Do you think a lot of JWs are ashamed of their beliefs?

by I quit! in

jw
friends

the reason i asked this is because i'm going to the funeral of a man who wasn't a jw.

my mother-in-law has lived in the same neighborhood as him for years and knows his wife.

i asked her if she was going attend the funeral service.

snakeface

Even when I was very "high profile" and very active - giving Sunday talks, conducting the Theocratic Ministry School, etc - I went to neighbors/relatives/coworkers funerals and weddings in their churches - was even a best man in a Baptist wedding, and pretty much everyone in the congregation knew about it. I'd tell them, "It's a conscience matter, right? RIGHT?"

All my neighbors and coworkers knew I was a "deacon" (as they'd say) in my church. However, I was able to tell that most in the congregation - even "appointed servants" - were ashamed of their beliefs. I guess many did not want to be there but had to because of families or other ties, and some were just not sure of their beliefs, and others just did not want to be "a theatrical spectacle".

21

Local Elder advises Young woman to make up with abusive husband

by troubled mind in

jw
friends

just never ceases to amaze me how things in the organization stay the same .

you would think by 2011 these guys could come up with something better than " makeup now ,you know jehovah hates a divorcing !

" ( but obviously he doesn't mind a woman being abused !

snakeface

One congregation I was, this one elder and his wife always sat in the front row. He'd always walk with his arm around her; I thought it was romantic. After they moved away I found out he was always beating her. The reason he'd walk with his arm around her was because she was in so much pain and could hardly stand up. I guess they sat up front to hide her face. It seemed that many in the congregation knew about this yet they'd all sit and listen to his public talks and the congregation would accept field service reports from him. I told the elder body the whole congregation is LUCKY I did not know about this because if I had, our congregation would have been on the news!

A few years later, when I was a MS, I was in a car group with elders and another MS. The elders were talking (and laughing!) about one particular couple who recently moved in to the territory. We all knew the husband was wacko. The elders were saying the wife had come to them to report abuse and that the husband threatened her with a pair of scissors. They elders had told her that was because she talks too much, and she should shut up and let the husband talk. (then they giggled) I asked the elders if they showed the husband the scriptures that say "Husbands ought to be loving their wives as their own bodies," and, "become imitators of Christ". I also asked them if the GB has provided guidelines on what the elders and MS should do if a brother ends up violently killing his wife and the media comes to the Hall with TV cameras to question the elders on the matter.

32

My Trip to the Unitarian Universal Church

by NewChapter in

jw
friends

so, pretty much i no longer care to believe in a god.

but, either because of my 20 years in a jw daze, or because humans just desire this, i miss the community.

so, i went to a unitarian church this morning.

snakeface

I am so glad this subject has been brought up. As a child I was a devout Catholic, very involved in church. Was an altar boy, played the organ on Sunday...it was an important part of my life. When I became a JW I again was very high profile in the circuit. On the platform at just about every meeting giving talks, and very active in many activities. After leaving I became irreligious. I wondered of most ex-jw's become that way, irreligious.

Over the past few years, at times "worldly" friends have invited me to visit their churches. Not to join, but just to visit with them on particular holidays such as Easter or Thanksgiving, to be followed by a meal. I've always told them I'm not "a church person". Now I realize that was rude of me and that I was missing out on many things.

So recently I've been thinking of joining a church, mostly for the "fellowship" and networking and because I would want to participate in the music and singing (such as chior). I do realize this would involve a committment on my part. I started reading about various religions on Wikipedia, and found two that seem to interest me. One is The Unity Church and the other in The Unitarian Universal Church. Maybe I will visit one this Sunday, and the other next Sunday. Also, last night I emailed a friend who had invited me to his church some time ago and told him I've been thinking of looking into it, and I asked him to tell me about his church. I haven't heard back from him yet.

I wonder if what most of us ex-jw's experience is, not the fact that we may not believe every single thing a particular religion teaches, but that we are conditioned to believe that have have to believe everything that religion teaches or we don't belong there; in other words, "all or nothing". Religions such as these two (Unity, and Unitarian Universal) apparently allow for members to have their own thoughts/beliefs/conclusions; members apparently are not required to believe everything and in the same exact way.

41

Elder Missing 24 hours...

by sleepingbeauty in

jw
friends

a brother i know of was made up as an elder only some mere 6 weeks ago.

out the blue he has gone total awol and has now been missing over 24 hours.

i wonder if the stress of becoming an elder at 27 yrs old got to him !!!

snakeface

I thought men had to be 30 to be appointed elder, and 18 to be appointed MS. I guess that has changed.

The last 3 or 4 years I was in, I did see a pattern of brothers getting appointed elder, then within 6 months stepping down or being "removed". It must be that the sudden increase of responsibilities brings stress upon him and his family, and disrupts their lives.

73

My Labrador died can anyone please help me. I can't stand the pain.

by Witness 007 in

my wife recovered from depression just 14 months ago and things have been going well.....so much so that i started a buisness for her and we are two weeks into it.

my labby was ill vomiting abit of discomfort, i thought great, you ate something bad again!

the vet gave him a shot and sent us home.

snakeface

It is so encouraging to see all the supportive posts here! I lost 4 of my dogs in December and one at the beginning of January. They were all old; the oldest was 16. It wasn't until a few weeks ago that someone directed me to a support group, which really helped me cope.

29

Did you make very good comments at the Kingdom Hall?

by Iamallcool in

did you study beforehand?

alot?

did you only "study" while you are reading the paragraphs during the wt study and still make great comments?.

snakeface

I always studied and was prepared to give any and every part for every meeting. I was actually always "on call" to give a last minute Sunday public talk if needed. (Only once did I have to; got called Saturday 9:30 PM and was asked to give a talk the next morning).

Most of the time what would happen was, the conductor would ask the quesiton, I'd answer in my own words, then he wouldn't realize I answered the question. So he'd be asking the audience, "And what does the paragraph bring out about...?" Then someone would read it word for word. Then others would start saying, "That's what [snakeface] said." And the conductor would say, "Oh, I didn't know that's what he meant." So in other words, the conductor was looking for an answer in the exact wording found in the paragraph. If you worded it differently he was not intelligent enough to understand the comment. Which, in turn, proves that he himslef had not prepared the lesson. He should he first learned the material, but instead he must have had his kids underline the answers so that on the platform he'd compare the comments with the underlined answers.

73

My Labrador died can anyone please help me. I can't stand the pain.

by Witness 007 in

my wife recovered from depression just 14 months ago and things have been going well.....so much so that i started a buisness for her and we are two weeks into it.

my labby was ill vomiting abit of discomfort, i thought great, you ate something bad again!

the vet gave him a shot and sent us home.

snakeface

Witness 007, I am so sorry. Please find a pet loss support group in your area; they will be able to help. To find one, call your vet, the local animal shelter, or local stores such as Petsmart and ask them if they know of a local group. If that doesn't work please PM me with your location and I will try to help find a group for you.

18

Get to the point!

by Mr. Falcon in

two jehovah's witnesses walk up to a house and knock on the door.

a younger man wearing a t-shirt with all kinds of swirl-patterns on it (think tie-dye, but not quite) answers the door and the first jw goes into his presentation.

he is offering the watchtower on the "occult" (cue spooky music).

snakeface

AGuest, thanks for pointing that out to me.

Quendi, I've always felt the same way as you, regarding being alert for clues about the householder and to listen. Years ago there was an Awake on Birth Control, which a young publisher proceeded to present to a householder in her 80's. Another time, an elderly householder said he was in pain, had health problems, poor eyesight and so on. The elder simply told him that everyone has problems, we can't sit around dwelling on them but instead we need to fill our minds with the positive upbuilding articles in these magazines....

And what about the times we'd go to a door and realize the householder (or return visit) had company? Or were in the middle of eating a meal? I'd always quickly acknowledge I came at a bad time and then I'd leave. Other publishers would go on and on with a lenghty presentation and even tell the householder to share the message with their visitors.

We can add to the list the householders who obviously had been sleeping. Some publishers wouldn't care. While walking away from the door they'd even be saying things to each other - which the householder can hear - accusing the householder of staying out late drinking and partying. How do they know what the householder was doing? Maybe they're working two jobs to pay off hospital bills. Maybe they were up all night taking care of an ill loved one. Or maybe they just want to sleep in. Who knows? No explanation is needed. Deal with things as you can see they are.

35

Do not let work get in the way of pioneering

by life is to short in

the april 15th wt is strange and it just throws things in here and there that are kind of out of sort.

i think it sticks in your mind more like hey i probably should pioneer when they throw things in that are kind of in left feild.. like this example on pages 16 and 17 it is talking about making decisions and in paragraph 15 it says "for example a congregation publisher might decide to pioneer.

will he succeed?

snakeface

I remember, the elders who stood on the platform and gave talks about materialism ("Ask yourself, 'do I really need that shiney new car or that bigger and better house?' Can that car or that house give me everlasting life?") were always the ones that had the newest and most expensive cars and homes, whereas those in the audience lived in old trailers and drove 17-year -old clunkers. Those one the platform had stay-at-home wives whereas those in the audience had wives who had to work and who also auxiliary pioneered.