LOLA -- You might use the WTS own explanation to suggest she postpone the decision. THEY state that it is the most important decision in one's life. Why go into this while still in the "bloom of youth" (which they apply to waiting on the decision to choose a marriage mate).
Suggest that as long as she is an unbaptized publisher, they will be anxious to help he to progress and support her in every way possible. Once she is dunked, they will seriously look down on her if she has a month that she cannot meet her "quota". Then she may be ostracized by other JW peers because she is "weak". She can also claim she is trying to be respectful of your opinion on the matter as it will make things easier on her, and she doesn't see where going ahead with the decision to be baptized is important to make you feel like she does not respect your position as one of her parents. You have been reasonable in allowing her father to pick her up for meetings on meeting nights when he does not have custody. They should honor your request about waitng for baptism, or you could play hardball with where she goes or does not go when you have custody. Courts will allow you the option of exposing her to YOUR religion (you might have to get a new religion) as well.
(Proverbs 6:20) . . .Observe, O my [child], the commandment of your father, and do not forsake the law of your mother. . .
(Matthew 15:4) 4 For example, God said, ‘Honor your father and your mother ’. . . It's a decision she should respect just to keep peace in the family until she is of legal age.
You might even suggest to your hubby that there have been non-believing custodial parents who have successfully petitioned the court to make restrictions that the child CANNOT be coerced to take the step of baptism until they are of age. It will be let hassle and less expensive if he cooperates with this request from you. He should have no problem with her waiting until she is of legal age.
DOC