Posts by LizardSnot

9

Wow this is kinda twisted

by bboyneko in

jw
friends

http://www.saunalahti.fi/~garon2/bombgame/.

what has the world come to when such games exsist!

my record is 5 dead 1 injured.. (prepares to get yelled at for dark humor)

The Elders are coming!!!

by lv4fer in

jw
friends

elder concerned called me last night.

we talked about a few of my concerns and why i haven't been to meetings/service in the last few months.

he has set up an appointment with my husband and i for next monday.

LizardSnot

The following is a rough draft letter that I would send if I felt the need to get out of the bOrg.
Here is what I would write...

To Whom It May Concern:

For various reasons I have chosen not to be disfellowshipped by the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society.
In addition to this I have also decided to not disassociate myself from your organization because, I desire to maintain my current loving relationships with friends and family.

If my friends and family, as a result of this letter, decide not to associate with me anymore, I know in my heart that this is not my fault and that I have done everything within my self-respecting means to keep that from happening.

This letter is not for the purpose of debate. No one ever wins an argument.

It is my opinion, however, after evaluating my own experiences and my careful study of the history of the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society, that they are not worthy of the title “God’s Earthly Organization”, therefore I am not subject to them.

In the business world...the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society would be considered in "Breach of Contract" because of their failed prophecies and cover-ups.
Since the WTBS has not held up their end of the bargain, one doesn’t have to be subject to them...end of contract.

Any organization that has contradicted their own beliefs by means of their own published periodicals should not have the auspicious position of claiming to be led by an almighty and perfect God.

As far as I’m concerned, your organization doesn’t exist.
I’m not scared of you (Deut. 18:22) and you have no power over me.

Lizard

36

So I guess it's finally my turn <grin>

by noidea in

jw
friends

well i had a visit today from an elder (related through marriage) about my non-meeting attendance.

he let me know that the circuit overseer is due in for a visit in 2 weeks and the elders in my congregation felt that it would be good for them to pay me a visit.

i have already declined other such offers.. he asked me why i was not attending the meetings (didn't reply to that) and that if i had a problem that i could talk about it.

LizardSnot

Noidea,

If you find yourself in front of a judicial committee, I suggest that you do the following annoying things:

*Dress up and do your hair like June Cleaver from "Leave it to Beaver".

Kill them with kindness...maybe offer them something to drink.

*Knit or crochet while they are asking you questions.

As much as possible try to have them repeat the questions that they ask you...(just for clarity) ;)

*Agree with everything that they say.
Once in a while say, "ah ha!" then pick up your "Smurf" notebook and scrawl some notes in it and say, "ok...got it".

Answer every phone call that comes in...if your phone doesnt normally ring alot....enlist the help of friends and family.

*Before the hearing...eat garlic and things that make your stomach growl.

When the brothers throw scriptures your way...throw one back at them that has nothing to do with the conversation...you know like...Matt. 27:5 "So Judas threw the money into the temple and left. Then he went away and hanged himself"

*Stop the brothers in the middle of an important thought and ask them what kind of pizza they like and what they want on it...because you really need something in your stomach before you take what you affectionately call your "grand slam" dose of meds.

Have a full pitcher of water and make sure to fill your glass at the most inappropriate times.

*Laugh when there is no reason to laugh.

Hold up your hand to your head as if talking into a phone and say, "What God...you created another class of Jehovah's Witnesses?...what is that?...oh ok...the Caiaphas class?"
then go on with your conversation as if nothing happened.

*Stop and act serious for a while and listen to what they have to say.
Then just as they are getting comfortable and getting their "groove on"...stand up and announce that the real reason you are having them over is to show them a familiar but new home business that will make them stinking rich. Go on to explain the advantages of Diamond level distributorship.

When something really threatening or stressful is said to you...just put your face in your hands and bawl your eyes out for about 15 seconds...then go from bawling to hysterical laughter.

*Make a quote from the Joker in Batman...."Did you ever dance with the devil in the pale moon light?

With any luck they will pass you off as a mental case and not bother you anymore.

Lizard

23

I'm gonna bring the WATCHTOWER down!

by butalbee in

jw
friends

..........oh yes, i have a plan!

it involves many different ideas and stradegies.

it may involve dirty acts of flirtation, fornification, and naughty pleasures of necessary needs.......i am looking for volunteers to help me....any one interested?

LizardSnot

So what do you need us to do Butal? ;)

Lizard

12

Your personal Goals

by outcast in

jw
friends

i found this on .

http://www.eusty.co.uk/ .

since it is monday, anyone care to add their goals to the list?

LizardSnot

To achieve a relaxed dream state with my eyes wide open

Lizard

28

Would you batter a burglar?

by sleepy in

jw
friends

just watching the news just now and another old man has been killed by burglars.. what would you do if you found an intruder in your house?.

do you feel its right to disable them in some way , if you can?.

would you let them run?.

LizardSnot

The only way I would kill someone would be if I thought one of my family was in danger.
I would never truely feel justified tho'...because in my mind I would have robbed that person of a possible relationship with Christ...that would really bug me.

Lizard

26

An e-mail I received this morning

by borgfree in

jw
friends

a friend sent this to me this morning.

i know this kind of e-mail is circulated a lot, and maybe this one has, but i have not seen it before.. as one of jehovah's witnesses i would have simply ignored the message in this e-mail.

now as an ex-jw i see it in a totally different way.

LizardSnot

Thanks for sharing that uplifting story...very encouraging.

Lizard

5

The Catholic Day (or Irish Day)

by Yerusalyim in

jw
friends

yerusalyim.

"vanity!

it's my favorite sin!".

LizardSnot

Happy Cinco De Mayo!

Lizard

5

CRITICISM of friends

by QUEENIE in

jw
friends

romans 2:1----when u judge another u condemn yourself: 4 u who judge practice the same things.. when you see faults in someone else, before you criticize, beware 4 u have faults and flaws too that other people must bear !!!

be patient with the faults of others; they have to be patient with yours..hope i have been coherant enough folks !!!

!

LizardSnot

That is a good scripture. Thanks for posting it because I was just looking for that one to share with a friend of mine.

Lizard

37

If you could have one wish come true....

by butalbee in

jw
friends

if you could have one wish come true, what would it be?

just one wish, that you would have to live w/ for the rest of your life, whether if be winning the lottery, finding true love, world peace, etc...what would you choose?.

i know what my wish would be...i wish i never met him.

LizardSnot

to be able to pursue my dream...