Mum

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Posts by Mum

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  39

  Are you happy?

  by teejay in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  in the context of this forum, happiness at its core is generally defined in one of two ways: a) being a witness or, b) not being a witness.

  most of us consider ourselves happier since leaving the organization.

  because of a recent discussion between violetanai and marilyn, i've thought about it some more, only to reaffirm the truth i already discovered some time ago.

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  Mum

  This is a great topic. Yes, I am happy in general. Yes, I am happier in general since I left the WT.

  Happiness can be affected by many things. I have learned from the Meyers-Briggs studies (in "Please Understand Me" and other books) that the "happiest" type is likely to be the SP/Artisan because this type of person naturally lives in the present and does not voluntarily choose activities that are not enjoyable. The type that is least likely to be "happy" would be the NF/Idealist or the SJ/Guardian. The idealist has an inner need to be a catalyst for change and to help others achieve their potential, both of which can lead to bitter disappointment. The SJ/Guardian is very methodical and more likely than other types to be bossy, having lots of "shoulds" to contend with. The NT/Rational is more detached and has less interest than other types in "happiness," being more abstract than realistic.

  I have taught myself to enjoy life more by learning about the other types and adopting their attitudes when it would be helpful. I read self-help books with strategies for improving one's life. There is nothing that cannot be learned, including happiness.

  My daughter is on anti-anxiety medication. At first, she resisted, telling her doctor that she would rather have therapy because she did not want to alter her brain chemistry. The doctor replied that therapy also alters brain chemistry. I believe that learning and self-examination must do so as well because I cope much better than I ever did before.

  Thanks, all, for your perspective.

  Regards,
  Mum
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  57

  Post a message to Sharon Roe(Janet Bryant's sister

  by seven006 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  sharon like her sister janet was also raised a jw.

  she left the religion three years ago just about the same time as robert and janet.

  her husband is not a jw but did attend the occasional meeting.

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  Mum

  Sharon,

  It does my heart good to see so many encouraging posts here. I hope it makes you realized how much people care and that there are so many more good people than bad ones. If you need to talk to anyone, you can e-mail me or, I am certain, anyone else on this forum.

  I extend my deepest sympathy, knowing that you have the love of God and many people to help you through this terrible time.

  Blessings,
  Mum
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  48

  Classic Movies? Name your Favorites

  by BoozeRunner in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  movies!

  movies!

  movies!

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  Mum

  Gone with the Wind - the classic of classics
  The Little Foxes (and other Bette Davis faves)
  Casablanca
  The Wizard of Oz
  (Beck's choice, mine, too) - To Kill a Mockingbird - one of the best
  Dr. Zhivago
  Babette's Feast (don't know the time frame on this one)
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  15

  Rocky Horror

  by wonderwoman77 in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  i love this movie.

  we watched the dvd last night and the outtakes and the funny stuff they have from it.

  it was great....

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  Mum

  "Rocky" is my favorite movie. We have a showing of it every year in the amphitheater in a downtown park. People bring birdseed (in lieu of rice) to throw during the wedding scene, newspaper (to cover heads when it starts "raining" from the squirt bottles that many people bring), flashlights (for the scene when Janet sings "There's a Light"). A theater troupe from somewhere in California comes and performs. There is a costume contest, too.

  If anyone wants to attend next July, get in touch with me, and we'll have a great time!

  Seize the day, and put the least possible trust in tomorrow. - Horace

  I have learned to live each day as it comes and not to borrow trouble by dreading tomorrow. - Dorothy Dix
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  23

  How Do You Deal With Stress??

  by JerryTX in

  1. watchtower
  2. medical

  what do you do when you're being blindsided from seemingly every direction and you're drowning in stress?

  what do you personally do to counteract it?.

  reading joelbear's latest post ("joelbear needs to calm down")reminded me of what it was like when first exiting the watchtower.

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  Mum

  It's very important to have a support system. People exiting the org have none. Therefore, one must be created by going to al-anon meetings or joining some other self-help group. I think reading self-help books helps. My favorite is still "Your Erroneous Zones" by Dr. Wayne Dyer.

  Physical activity also helps. Use the crisis call line if needed. Ask for help. Don't be too proud to show your vulnerability; most people are sympathetic and want to help.

  Best wishes to all who are in stressful situations,

  Mum

  Seize the day, and put the least possible trust in tomorrow. - Horace

  I have learned to live each day as it comes and not to borrow trouble by dreading tomorrow. - Dorothy Dix
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  13

  JW Leadership Is Evil

  by metatron in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  in response to people like sexyteen, i point out that most witnesses.

  are just naive, child-like people willing to believe most anything.

  their leadership tells them.. however, watchtower leadership is genuinely evil.. why?

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  Mum

  Good point about the child-like mentality of JW's. They are looking for people who are "moaning and groaning" about the state of things, which is to say they are looking for vulnerable people who feel powerless because such people are easier to control, passive, leaving it up to others to tell them what to do.

  I advise my friends to get rid of JW's by expressing happiness and a sense of peace and acceptance. It usually works.

  Seize the day, and put the least possible trust in tomorrow. - Horace

  I have learned to live each day as it comes and not to borrow trouble by dreading tomorrow. - Dorothy Dix
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  11

  JWs & Personal Finance

  by Valis in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  perhaps this is not a widespread phenomenon, but have any of you considered the ramifications in regards to many jw families never saving for retirement or college funds, becues they thought the end was near, or college was a non-issue for so many of us?

  just recently my parents never saved any money, becuase the promise of the end coming soon, but as old age creeps closer, i think some of the policy is revealing itself to be really bad advice.

  i also wonder how long jws have to keep working after retirement age than the rest of the 'worldlies".

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  Mum

  Most of the dubs I know are pretty well off, including the ones in my own family. I'm out of touch with the others. But I would be in very dire straits now if I had remained a JW.

  Seize the day, and put the least possible trust in tomorrow. - Horace

  I have learned to live each day as it comes and not to borrow trouble by dreading tomorrow. - Dorothy Dix
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  14

  Ex-Jw Book studies,anyone

  by badboy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  anyone thought of doing`ex-jw book studies?.

  suggested book titles.. studies in the jws.. millions now living have been deceived!.

  thy kingdom not came.. `can we give you a study of why jws are wrong'?.

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  Mum

  "My Book of Scary Stories" reminds me of the time I was reading the story of Nahum's little slave girl to my daughter when she was small. Once she grasped what had happened to the child, she burst into panic and loud sobbing. It was bedtime, and I ruined her sleep and gave her nightmares. She has panic attacks to this day. I wonder why.

  Seize the day, and put the least possible trust in tomorrow. - Horace

  I have learned to live each day as it comes and not to borrow trouble by dreading tomorrow. - Dorothy Dix
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  15

  should mothers work?

  by sleepy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  should mothers work?.

  i was just reading how some tv personnality earns 250.000 a year and pays for someone to mind her children.. isn't this making her job more important than her children?would she pay this much herself for a child minder or is her job more important than being certain her children are recieving the best care?.

  thats just thinking aloud ' i'm not sure where i stand on this.. maybe staying home with young children all day is to much for one human prehaps we need to do other things and children don't need their mother all the time and are ok with someone else.. i was looked after by my mother when young who gave up her job when pregnant with her first child.. my wife however was looked after by a child minder while her mum went to work .she feels she didn't miss out and would do the same.

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  Mum

  This question is one which many struggle with every day. In the days when other family members usually lived nearby, i.e., mother and child had an extensive support system, it would have worked much better.

  Some children are better off with strangers who are emotionally detached, no question about it; but, in most cases, I believe it's better for both mom and child to be together during the early years. Ironically, in our society, the moms who have the most to offer their children are most likely the ones to be away at work.

  Seize the day, and put the least possible trust in tomorrow. - Horace

  I have learned to live each day as it comes and not to borrow trouble by dreading tomorrow. - Dorothy Dix
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  10

  ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  by gilwarrior in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  as most of you know i usually write about sexual matters, but i would like to take this time to write about something serious.

  after two months of writing posts and reading others people's posts and have concluded that the jehovah's witness organization purposely prevents people from contact with other people, because that way it is hard for someone to leave the organization.

  if everyone you know is in the organization then how can you leave?

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  Mum

  I find it so ironic that the JW's constantly stress "heart condition." Nothing a JW ever does can be from the heart. It is so good to be able to choose friends because I like them and we have common interests, not because some brainwashed autocrat tells me they are my "friends."

  Seize the day, and put the least possible trust in tomorrow. - Horace

  I have learned to live each day as it comes and not to borrow trouble by dreading tomorrow. - Dorothy Dix