Gargamel

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Posts by Gargamel

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  24

  When did the governing body go from 12 to 7 members?

  by Tameria2001 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i have been out and away from that cult since 2001. back then there were 12 members of the governing body, and now i'm learning that number has come down to 7. when did this change take place, and what was their reason for dropping the number?.

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  Gargamel

  Will be interesting when only one is left.
  
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  12

  JWs do Volunteer To Help Worldly Organizations Distribute Food to the Needy

  by Athanasius in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  some months back i posted a topic asking if jws were now encouraged to volunteer their time for charitable organizations, as one of the volunteers who i work with was promoting jw.org to one of the spanish speaking workers.

  because of that, i guessed that he was a jw.. https://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/5708790489939968/jws-now-encouraged-volunteer.

  well the other day as he and i were folding and stacking tables after distributing food to the needy, i mentioned that after i retired i got bored and decided to do volunteer work.

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  Gargamel

  I've only ever known JWs to do "charitable" work for other JWs. I'm sure there must be exceptions though.
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  15

  What's your passion???

  by Faith after Deception in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  yesterday, i was feeling very blue.

  this is quite unusual for me, as i tend to be quite an upbeat, positive person, so spells of sadness or depression take me by surprise and are a real shock to the system.

  you know, i don’t believe in “putting on a face” or pretending to be ok; this “fake it ’til you make it” malarkey has never been something i’ve liked.

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  Gargamel

  In recent years I have become passionate about writing. It's not new as it was always part of me, but it became buried under years of difficult life events.

  It was re-triggered a couple of years ago. Like many former JWs, I didn't receive the education that I desired and deserved, I would have done very well academically, but I was 15 in 1972, three years before the system was going to crash down around us. In those days you could still leave school at 15 in the UK, so I did. I was top of the class in German and Spanish, and very close to it in English. Even my maths was in the top 10 per cent.

  I went back to school for evening classes (in my late fifties) to study for maths and English GCSEs (the exams that 16 year olds take). Let's just say that even after forty years without any schooling, I clearly undersold myself.

  So now I write when I'm not too tired. I'm not bothered about it being commercially viable - just as well really! I just enjoy doing it.

  I'll probably go down the self-publishing on Kindle route eventually, but I don't hold out any realistic hopes of making a living from it.

  I enjoy trying my hand at playing with poetry. Creativity has been stifled of late by fatigue. When that happens, I just critique other people's work as it's all part of the learning curve.

  Most of all - IT'S FUN!
  
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  17

  JW over-rode our Choice of Funeral music

  by snugglebunny in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a few years on and the funeral of my jw momma still galls me.

  she left instructions for which kingdom songs to be sung and we gladly abided by her wishes.

  the funeral was held in a public crematorium, not a kingdom hall.

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  Gargamel

  "So as momma's executors, we just sent the local KH the money that she'd willed to them. We didn't get an acknowledgement."

  ---------------------

  I'm thinking that it might have been better to hold the money in a safe account until they asked for it.

  I wonder if not communicating with the disfellowshipped still counts when they want money from them.

  I'm not suggesting stealing it or using it for one's own purposes, merely to delay paying in order to force them to communicate.
  
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  72

  Single Sisters Over A Certain Age Group Getting A Bad Rap

  by HiddlesWife in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  i'm new here; one of my relatives was a member on this forum a few years ago and told me about it.

  anyways, as a sister who has been in the org since childhood and now in her late 40's (plus as a woman of color), i have noticed that a number of brothers have an ageist attitude.

  they are very accepting of young women under 26 and rejecting women over that age, particularly those in their 30's and over.. is this an unspoken mindset from wthq (specifically from bethel), or is it that quite a number of males (sorry, i'm not sexist here) have this type of mentality?

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  Gargamel

  Although it's generally worse in religions, women have always had a pretty raw deal.

  Voting was a classic example (in the UK). Some even adopted male pen names in order to have written work published.

  Having two world wars in the 20th century changed things as women took on many roles that were traditionally men's. More reliable contraception possibly accelerated the process too.
  
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  19

  Can JWs Use Corporal Punishment On Their Children?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  can a parent slap or use a "rod of discipline" on their kids?

  i know it's politically incorrect and perhaps illegal, but is it a personal decision based upon the scriptures or is it taboo these days?.

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  Gargamel

  I don't know if things have changed in the UK.

  I left the org, and was pressured out of the family home, in 1973. I was 16. Although I got away lightly with physical punishments, I heard plenty of whackings from the back room and toilet areas. It sometimes seemed like a competition to see who could make their kids scream the loudest.

  My younger sister fell foul of my father's smackings a few times. I don't know if it got worse as she was only 9 when I was shown the exit door. I can still picture a day (at home) when my father was whacking her for some misdemeanour. Naturally, she started crying. He then continued to hit her because she was crying. Logic check: Hit a kid. Kid cries. Hit kid for crying.
  
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  19

  Your opinion about dating sites?

  by nevaagain in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have been a jw all my life, while i also have a "spiritual divorce", which means i can remarry a jw again.

  i am not sure if i want to go that route again and dating in the jw world feels like a struggle sometimes.

  with all the rules.

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  Gargamel

  My take on this, which may or may not be right for you:

  Live your life doing the social things that interest you and make you happy. It doesn't matter what they are- writing club (local library?), reading group, badminton club, rambling/hiking etc. etc.

  You may not meet anyone suitable for a while that way, but you will feel happy. Potential partners (unless they are co-dependent masochists) are more attracted to happy people.

  If your needs are more about "friends with benefits" or just sexual, than about a long-term, committed relationship, at least be honest with her about it. If it's more about sexual curiosity (quite possible for someone from a religion that believes in heavy repression), maybe it would be better to avoid the risk of hurting someone and simply go and pay someone for the experience(s).

  Whichever route you take, I certainly feel that it's better to date initially with a view to discovering yourself without making promises that yu may later need to break.

  Above all, enjoy the journey and - be safe (but not so much that you can't experiment).
  
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  20

  Dodgy poetry

  by Gargamel in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  it is a stretch to call my dodgy poetry 'entertainment' but i wasn't sure where else to put it.. .

  self-fulfilling prophecy.

  precipitation.

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  Gargamel

  This is an example of a poetry form called etheree. The syllable count on each line ranges from 1-10, or 10-1 if preferred. I can't centre text on here so imagine it centred:

  
  

  Suffer Little Children
  
  Predictions of apocalypse abound.
  Terrify your toddlers lest they leave.
  Immerse them in the name of men,
  drunk with dreams, blood-sodden thugs,
  self-delusion oozing
  from misleading mouths.
  You prey on babes
  to obtain
  holy
  love.
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  15

  £1 million pound fine

  by pepperheart in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  hi a court in the uk in loughborough have fined the jws over £1 million pounds for the court costs for a child abuse case in loughborough in the east midlands..

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  Gargamel

  Indeed, not a fine but compensation + costs.

  I doubt that anything can really be true compensation, but at least it could go some way to making restitution for the lost income caused by disturbance to her education - or pay for her adult education. It will also assist with any therapy costs if she chooses to go outside the NHS for help.

  I was surprised to see that leave to appeal was denied, but without seeing detailed reasons, it's not possible to comment in-depth on that.
  
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  44

  What crime should elders report?

  by kramer in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so, i am trying to get my head around what the right position of elders should be when they come across crime is.. i think i get the issuess around clergy confidentiality - and how that might potentially be breached when they talk about it to other elders, let alone the police.. but if people are saying that elders - or clergy of another faith should report crime to the police when it is confessed to the, then where are the boundaries.. so if someone says they should report to police on a confessed example of child abuse, that's one thing.. how about reporting to police consensual sex between a 19year old and 15 year old - which is statutory rape in the uk.

  how about criminal fraud if they come across it.

  assault on a congregant?.

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  Gargamel

  A very thought-provoking question, and I don't suppose I have an answer.

  For a start, I feel that if a crime is in danger of being repeated it should qualify; people who interfere sexually with children are usually repeat offenders.

  And then there is a crime where repetition wouldn't be likely to occur (perhaps murdering someone in anger), but the seriousness overcomes being forgiven without legal restitution being made (i.e. probably a lengthy term of imprisonment in this case).

  I suppose that if someone drove recklessly while angry and there were no consequences, that need not be reported, especially if they went for therapeutic help on anger management. But if there were consequences like injuring or killing another, again the seriousness ought to take precedence.

  If it came to stealing something minor from a shop, undetected, and someone was genuinely remorseful, personally I think that could be dealt with in-house - maybe by making financial restitution anonymously and stripping of "privileges".

  No hard and fast rules perhaps, but I suppose the problem would be about leaving such decisions in the hands of people who know the perpetrator personally and who would be biased about bringing a bad name on the organisation.