Posts by happysunshine

8

Statistics request...

by happysunshine in

can someone point me in the right direction for x-jw stats?

primarily, i need to find out: how many % people raised as witnesses leave later; mental illness rates of current/x members; anything else available.

i'm surmising that there hasn't been much research in this area to date.

Awsome guys- looks like pretty slim pickings though. I'll dig around. Bergman has some good info, but I'd like some more recent empirical stuff. I'm guessing interest/resources are lacking because its a special interest thing. Research on current Witnesses would be a challenge, code of silence behind the 'wall' and all that sort of thing. Thanks for the pointers! -J

15

Do you feel alienated from your JW family?

by dins in

just a general query as today i am feeling, as most sundays, like i want to move to the moon and get away from my jw family...ie, mother and father.

for years i lived abroad and didn't really think about it much, but now that i am back and in the area, just the very thought of spending too many minutes in their company makes me want to pack up and move away again.

it's been several years since i left home and the jw organization.

happysunshine

Hi Diane!

I really walked the talk, gave it everything I could growing up until I left at 21. I think that helped me, because I left having confidence I was doing the right thing. I didn't 'waver' or 'rebel' or get 'pressured out'. It simply didn't work. I would probably have a lot of emotional sludge in me now if I had left before I was convinced it was wrong.

Having said that, it does mean there's no challenges. I still have to deal with 'weirdness' between my family and I. There's also the occasional phobia or bad a ttitude that pops up, and I can trace it to being raised a witness. But I think I'm dealing with it pretty good. And I'm a lot nicer guy than I used to be ;-)

As far as blame, bad feelings, etc., thats a tricky one. I think these emotions exist for a reason, and we can used their power. It's kind of like riding an animal- great on top, not good underneath. I find it helpful to compare it with non-JW stuff. For example, what role would anger play in other situations where someone was/is getting hurt? True, getting mad at your folks isn't going to make the past go away, but in a sense it can change it. I mean, why do we have a criminal/civil court at all if taking action after the fact is useless?

Of course, you have to consider the situation, but generaly I don't buy the 'we thought we were doing the best for you' defense. That is used for all kinds of stuff, including abuse. A study on serial child molesters showed that some actualy believed that the children wanted to have sex and that they were doing them a favour by attacking them. I know its an extreme analogy, but the same psycho/social processes often work with Witnesses. Where does the buck stop then?

I think the organisation acts a kind of 'emotional clearing house' for many Witnesses. There is a structured outlet for jealosy, anger, hate, even rage. I can't remember how many elders I saw lose it at the door with someone who didn't think inside the box. Even their biggest joy, the paradise, only comes after 6 billion people are massacred. That's the ultimate outlet for agression. I often remember Witnesses joking around about an unfriendly householder, saying they would be running around on fire or something.

liljwgirl wrote-

Besides, we have no hard feelings towards those who don't agree with us.. Everyone is allowed to be opinionated.

Please. In the combined 300+ years my family and I have spent as Witnesses, this has never been actualized. I do remember a lot of people who suddenly 'dissapeared', silenced directly or indirectly by the Watchtower, never to be seen again. A lot of them turn up here, others commit suicide, still others... who knows.

I think you are a troll, posing as 'liljwgirl'. NOT cool here. Go to a holocaust survivours board and pose as a Nazi or something.

Diane, hang in there. -J

Are there genuinly nice, sweet people in this world? Yes, absolutely yes, and they get as angry as often as you and I. They must- otherwise they would be full of vindictive feelings and slush, which would prevent genuine sweetness. -Theodore Isaac Rubin

21

Angry Kids

by LongHauler in

all right, obviously i'm a little new here so bear with me.

just out of curiosity, has anyone here that was raised as a jay-dub felt resentment or anger or animosity toward thier parents?

i wanted nothing to do with the cult even at a fairly early age, but would a person feel that way if they had believed as a teen?

happysunshine

Hi LongHauler!

I wanted nothing to do with the cult even at a fairly early age, but would a person feel that way if they had believed as a teen?

I'm not sure if this is the nature of your queery, but do you mean raised as and still buying it as a teen? If so, that was me. I really walked the talk, gave it everything I could growing up until I left at 21. I think that helped me, because I left having confidence I was doing the right thing. I didn't 'waver' or 'rebel' or get 'pressured out'. It simply didn't work. I would probably have a lot of emotional sludge in me now if I had left before I was convinced it was wrong.

Having said that, it does mean there's no challenges. I still have to deal with 'weirdness' between my family and I. There's also the occasional phobia or bad a ttitude that pops up, and I can trace it to being raised a witness. But I think I'm dealing with it pretty good. And I'm a lot nicer guy than I used to be ;-)

As far as blame, bad feelings, etc., thats a tricky one. Like Lisa said, you don't want to get stuck there. I find it helpful to compare it with non-JW stuff. For example, what role would anger play in other situations where someone was/is getting hurt? True, getting mad at your folks isn't going to make the past go away, but in a sense it can change it. I mean, why do we have a criminal/civil court at all if taking action after the fact is useless?

Of course, you have to consider the situation, but generaly I don't buy the 'we thought we were doing the best for you' defense. That is used for all kinds of stuff, including abuse. A study on serial child molesters showed that some actualy believed that the children wanted to have sex and that they were doing them a favour by attacking them. I know its an extreme analogy, but the same psycho/social processes often work with Witnesses. Where does the buck stop then?

I think the organisation acts a kind of 'emotional clearing house' for many Witnesses. There is a structured outlet for jealosy, anger, hate, even rage. I can't remember how many elders I saw lose it at the door with someone who didn't think inside the box. Even their biggest joy, the paradise, only comes after 6 billion people are massacred. That's the ultimate outlet for agression. I often remember Witnesses joking around about an unfriendly householder, saying they would be running around on fire or something.

liljwgirl wrote-

Besides, we have no hard feelings towards those who don't agree with us.. Everyone is allowed to be opinionated.

Please. In the combined 300+ years my family and I have spent as Witnesses, this has never been actualized. I do remember a lot of people who suddenly 'dissapeared', silenced directly or indirectly by the Watchtower, never to be seen again. A lot of them turn up here, others commit suicide, still others... who knows.

I think you are a troll, posing as 'liljwgirl'. NOT cool here. Go to a holocaust survivours board and pose as a Nazi or something.

LongHauler, hang in there buddy. -J

Are there genuinly nice, sweet people in this world? Yes, absolutely yes, and they get as angry as often as you and I. They must- otherwise they would be full of vindictive feelings and slush, which would prevent genuine sweetness. -Theodore Isaac Rubin

39

Barbara Anderson sues WTS for $7M

by Nathan Natas in

http://www.zwire.com/site/news.cfm?brd=1614&dept_id=161052&newsid=6011345&pag=461&rfi=9

banned church member sues jehovah's witnesses .

by brian justice, the sunday news staff writer november 09, 2002 .

happysunshine

GO!!!

11

Squamish, Vancouver, Halifax, Parksville, Scarbor

by happysunshine in

squamish, vancouver, halifax, parksville, scarborough.

any connections with congregations in these areas drop me a line.

i've been associated with them in the past.

happysunshine

Hi quotes and beans-

I was there for a short time in '88, near Pharmacy and the 401.

Orbison-

Most of my time was spent in Squamish, '80-'87. Horseshoe Bay '77-'80, and Londsdale '88.

5

The sun also rises

by kenpodragon in

jw
friends

i woke up a couple of weeks ago, thinking that my life would be like any other day.

i set up in bed, doing my normal focus into the world of the living and working my way into the normal day's routine.

work was normal, a few things to get done by five and a lot of things to get done by the end of the week.

happysunshine

Hang in there pal. I wrestle with that interplay between love and ... I don't know how to say. Words are a cheap tool that doesn't always get the job done. Anyway, hang in there. Say hello to your wife. I'm currently going through some related issues with my father's Parkinson's diagnosis. -J

8

Statistics request...

by happysunshine in

can someone point me in the right direction for x-jw stats?

primarily, i need to find out: how many % people raised as witnesses leave later; mental illness rates of current/x members; anything else available.

i'm surmising that there hasn't been much research in this area to date.

happysunshine

Can someone point me in the right direction for X-JW stats? Primarily, I need to find out: how many % people raised as Witnesses leave later; mental illness rates of current/X members; anything else available. I'm surmising that there hasn't been much research in this area to date. Thanking you in advance. -J

11

Squamish, Vancouver, Halifax, Parksville, Scarbor

by happysunshine in

squamish, vancouver, halifax, parksville, scarborough.

any connections with congregations in these areas drop me a line.

i've been associated with them in the past.

happysunshine

cool scully-

I was in Fairview from '88-'94. Must have just missed you! We probably know all the same people. Any stories?

13

Halifax, Nova Scotia

by DevonMcBride in

.

any canadian's here from halifax?

does anyone know the lively family?

happysunshine

wowa, I was in Fairview from '88-'95. Iknow the name Sid Lively only as a famous apostate in Shubenachedy (sp?).

11

Squamish, Vancouver, Halifax, Parksville, Scarbor

by happysunshine in

squamish, vancouver, halifax, parksville, scarborough.

any connections with congregations in these areas drop me a line.

i've been associated with them in the past.

happysunshine

Squamish, Vancouver, Halifax, Parksville, Scarborough. Any connections with congregations in these areas drop me a line. I've been associated with them in the past.