NN,
I usually look forward to and admire your posts, but I must take exception to this one. Just as jayhawk1 and Andi are sensitive to suicide jokes, your post makes me prick. I am sure you mean no harm, or may even be making a point...
This is a story about a small town named Arnprior, Ontario, Canada. Two JW families, one name Lytle. The Lytles were a wonderful family, and well-loved by the whole town and by myself.
The father, Jack was my best friend and a fine human being. His wife Margaret was a close friend of mine too.
The oldest son and daughter were pioneers, and were selfless people. They both worked tiredlessly for the JW faith and the congregation. They both led model lives. I might add that the son was handsome, and the daughter breathtaking. A real head-turner and heart-stopper. And as Windrider can testify, I don't say that about many women.
The daughter liked to drive cars fast. Yes, I know this makes her less than perfect, but is fairly normal where I come from. Strangely, the religious ones of every faith are the ones that drive the fastest.
Anyway, five of them are zipping along at 100mph on a gravel highway and they hit loose gravel, then a tree. The driver, the daughter, was decapitated. Her brother was killed; two others are killed as well. The fifth person survived, so we know what happened.
There was no alcohol or drugs involved, just a little young adult foolishness.
Two JW families lost two children each in a matter of seconds. The father of the other family, whose name I never learned, committed suicide a few weeks later because he could not handle the grief.
The Lytle's marriage broke up under the strain of the deaths. I remember the look on their faces. The pain on Jack's face when he received the bill for the cremation. The bill brought back vividly the deaths...he hung his head. What could I say to ease his pain? I could do nothing except empathize.
At first, only a modest uology [sic] was going to be printed in the paper. But a kind elder decided that he wanted the town to know that these were not foolish young people. He wanted people to understand the immense goodish of Wendy and Joel, that they were selfless and were trying to use their lives to serve others.
Hundreds of people from Arnprior turned out to the memorial service. The whole town was devestated. Return visits stopped having JWs call because "if God could allow that to happen to such a fine young couple, then I don't want to worship Him." Then the return visits would weep, right there at the door.
It is normal on this board to criticize the JW religion. And yes, in some ways the JW faith made the situation more difficult. But in general, the goodness of the Witnesses came through. Arnprior was a tough, demanding, no-excuses-allowed congregation. Yet, in this time of grief, people pulled together, because the grief was so great it had to be shared. The congregation's response was not perfect, but it did bring out the best in many, if not all.
That was the first time I really mourned a death. Previously, I was not mature enough to understand what it means to lose someone. I grieved intensely for weeks about Wendy and Joel, and about the injustice of it all. That is when I learned how to cope with grief.
It is easy to remember the bad JWs: the hypocritical elder, the gossipy elderette, the judgemental brothers and sisters. But we sometimes forget the good ones, the sincere ones who real are good people. All of the Lytles were really good people.
Sorry if I missed your point, NN. You were probably using irony somehow. 'Cause somehow I don't feel like laughing...
Richard Nazar/Skeptic
