Hey LyinEyes,
Reading this post brings back a lot of memories for me. I was prime for the US draft when I was a teenager. Any young man, regardless of nationality, was eligible. I was a witness at the time and dutifully declined to go into the military.
I also chose not to go to Canada. I spoke to the board, was offered options and declined. I was threatened with jail time and was so convinced of the correctness of my decision that I simply told them to bring it on. This was in Texas. Nationalism was high, especially in the south. My mothers family (consisting originally of 10 uncles) were ALL military. It wasnt an easy decision.
I saw (worldly) friends go into the military. Some came home some didnt. I saw friends that were witnesses go to jail and others not.
I have never criticized anyone for going into the military. The only thing that shamed me was the treatment received by a lot, if not most, of the guys returning home. I thought then as I do now that most of them did what they felt was their duty and obligation.
As for my personal decision not to go, I did not and do not regret it. My decision was based on conscience. Knowing then what I know now I would still be a conscientious objector. The only difference is that I would have opted for alternative service. For me, however, possibly dying was not the issue. My decision was based on my understanding of the Bible and how I view my relation to the government.
Perhaps it is inappropriate for me to offer advice. But, being who I am, here is my advice. You dont have to be a member of a religious organization to claim status as a conscientious objector. If I am mistake in this belief, someone will undoubtedly correct me.
If your son(s) make the decision to volunteer or to sign up for the draft, you would do well to respect their feelings. If you stand in the way they will probably resent it. If you dont you will be showing them that you respect them as young men and they will love you for it. Forgive me for saying this but, if the only reason they can give for not going is, my mama wont let me, they will feel humiliated. Not good for a healthy relationship.
If they accept service or refuse it it should be because they truly believe in their particular decision. Needless to say, the government wont accept a half-hearted excuse either. You have trained your son. There is much more you can (and will) teach him. But you have to rely on his understanding and application of your teaching. It is time for him to start to reason on his own and come to a workable understanding of his reasons for going or not.
Believe me, as a father, I would be heartbroken to see my own son go to war. I am proud of him as a son and would be proud of him if he were an American and decided to go. I would be equally proud of him if his conscience would not allow it. But, in any event, it would be his decision. You really cant make it for him.
I have nothing but high regard for the men and women who decide that military service is what they must do. And, I am touched and saddened when some of them die in service. I firmly believe that it IS a matter of conscience.
I doubt that this is of much comfort to you or to any other mother or father who might face such a prospect. But I hope that in some way what I have said will be useful.
Marcos