DJS

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Posts by DJS

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  51

  Dating Advice needed

  by KateWild in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  well i joined two dating sites yesterday and i have had lots of messages.

  a couple of guys want to chat to me by phone to get to know me better.

  i've been asked out on two dates.

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  DJS

  VG, not bad advice. And hopefully 'he' will be doing the same thing.
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  51

  Dating Advice needed

  by KateWild in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  well i joined two dating sites yesterday and i have had lots of messages.

  a couple of guys want to chat to me by phone to get to know me better.

  i've been asked out on two dates.

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  DJS

  Is dating multiple guys ethical? At the same time? Just kidding. In the last year I was on a few of the dating sites, for the first time. I think it is kind of expected on these sites that you will be checking out more than one person. I did, but I was honest as to my intentions. Most dates were one and done. I think it is also expected on these sites that, if you go out with someone a few times - and especially if sex is involved - that you will disable your account. Be careful with this, because if you are intimate with someone who you do not want a relationship with, they will almost certainly check out your account to see if you are still on looking. If this happens, expect some nasty emails/texts/phone calls. That's not an ethical issue unless you are misleading someone, but it is an annoying feature of these sites.

  I learned the hard way to avoid giving my phone number until after I had met them. Email will work just fine, and those sites typically have their own internal email system. If you use yours, make sure it doesn't ID you. I have more crazy ass women stories than I care to relate. Harm no one. Be honest. Have fun. Wear protection (well, make him).

  Back to dating multiple people: A few years ago, when I wasn't in the relationship mood (incapable actually) I dated a lot of different women at the same time. Juggling them gave me a charge. It was fun. And expensive. But I never lied to any of them or promised any of them anything, so I didn't have to look over my shoulder or avoid phone calls, etc. It was what it was. I never played on their affections or told them I loved them, they were my soul mate (Tiger Woods comes to mind), etc. If you go that route, just be honest. Promise nothing. Avoid relying on them or planning your day/week/month/year around them. And don't tell them you love them just to get them naked. Oh, that's us guys. Sorry.
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  79

  If a Nuclear War Was to Start would you start praying again

  by cassuk11 in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  i would be interested to know if the announcement came of an immenent nuclear war would you start praying or get drunk etc etc..

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  DJS

  I was trying to ignore this OP, but the OPer is annoying and the OP won't go away. So here goes.

  Your premise is that there are no real atheists. I get it. It's the old axiom that there are no atheists in fox holes. That's all BS, don't you know? A few years out of the Borg my son almost died in my arms. It didn't dawn on me until about 3 weeks afterward (he spent a few days in the hospital but recovered) that, not only did I not pray, the thought of praying, while he was unconscious and in my arms, never entered my mind. I love my son more than life and he is stupid crazy close to me. If I wouldn't pray then, I certainly wouldn't pray if global thermonuclear war broke out.

  I really don't know why this OP has lasted so long. I try to ignore the self appointed governing body and the itinerant preachers who pop in from time to time to save me and the rest of us heathens. The IPs and the new GB nauseate me. If I did pray it would be that you and your kind would go away.
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  25

  Ensure that you dont appear to be Negative , Unhappy or Bitter

  by stuckinarut2 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  just a quick thought.... we know that the org loves to paint all those who fade or leave as "negative, bitter and unhappy"...because of course "the truth is the happiest way to live".

  so, never allow ourselves to be that way when talking with witnesses, or family members still in.. show them that we are happy, our lives are fulfilled and positive.. then they have no ammunition.

  also, it helps other doubters to see that there is life in the world beyond the org..

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  DJS

  Stuck,

  I agree. I understand Talesin on this, but your'e correct in not faking it. I encouraged my children to show the Dubs, whenever they ran into them, to be positive and talk about the successful things they were doing. Avoiding the borgians (one was never baptized and the other wasn't DFed) or acting hurt/angry/aloof when around them sends the borg the message that you aren't happy because you don't have Jah and the borg. My daughter had a lot of justifiable angst towards the Borg but the Dubs she typically ran in to didn't know or have anything to do with the ugliness she experienced.

  It is how I respond to all Dubs. I am kind, positive and if I get a chance to talk about my successes I do so. Even when they come to my door in the preaching work (and after 20 years I don't think most of them even associate my home with an ex-Dub), I am kind, thank them and simply tell them I'm not interested.
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  75

  American Rantings About World Cup Soccer (Football)

  by RubaDub in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i try ... i really try to watch football (soccer) ... it's world cup time ... i really do try.. i just don't get it ... i really don't.. yes, it's a world-wide sport.

  in most countries it is the number 1 or number 2 sport ... no doubt about it.

  it's maybe number 5 in the usa for professional sports.. from an american's perspective (i think i speak for many), we just wonder if these guys actually have testicles.

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  DJS

  It is a beautiful game, and I have watched enough to appreciate what Cofty says about it. His descriptions are accurate. But 1-0???? That's my only beef. I wouldn't watch US football or baseball if one score was the norm or typical. I don't want to watch US college basketball either when the scores are in the 50s for both teams (yeah I'm talking about you Big Ten BB). I have an excellent attention span (well, mostly), but sports is also entertainment.
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  75

  American Rantings About World Cup Soccer (Football)

  by RubaDub in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i try ... i really try to watch football (soccer) ... it's world cup time ... i really do try.. i just don't get it ... i really don't.. yes, it's a world-wide sport.

  in most countries it is the number 1 or number 2 sport ... no doubt about it.

  it's maybe number 5 in the usa for professional sports.. from an american's perspective (i think i speak for many), we just wonder if these guys actually have testicles.

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  DJS

  Cofty,

  Soccer can be beautiful, I agree. I am amazed at the skill and athleticism. But 1 - 0???? That is common in soccer. I'd as soon watch paint dry. I tried to get into soccer a few years ago. My final moment of caring was an Olympic match between the US and whoever. The US lost 1-0 (wow, that's surprising). I read about it in the following day's news and the (world class) soccer writer wrote about the match that midway through the final period the (whoever it was) had a commanding 1-0 lead over the US. And he wasn't joking; it wasn't tongue in cheek. The only thing that should be commanding when the score is 1-0 is global thermonuclear warfare - when your adversary has none and you just fired your first at their critical target.

  They allow too darned many players to clog the net area. Enlarge the net and keep most of those guys on the other side of the mid-court line. Then I will like soccer.
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  45

  ONE REASON

  by snare&racket in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  out of interest, and to formulate a cordial chat, would you give your top one reason for your belief or non belief?.

  my foremost 'one reason' for non belief is:.

  the historical evidence that provides an explination and timeline for how the modern religious doctrine's and dogma developed over time.. .

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  DJS

  One reason:

  For at least 100,000 years the average lifespan of humans was about 34 years, including the year 1900. A loving god? Really? Nonsense.
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  144

  Escaping Indoctrination - Faith Isn't a Virtue.

  by cofty in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the unknown writer of the gospel of john put the following words in jesus' mouth, "blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.".

  persuading countless generations that it is a virtue to believe incredible things on insufficient evidence, is one of religion's cleverest tricks.. the more incredible the claim; the more flimsy the evidence; the stronger the belief; the greater the virtue.. this is the exact opposite of how we operate in every other aspect of our lives.. rational people must demand objective evidence for everything they are asked to believe.

  "extraordinary claims demand extraordinary evidence".. leaving the dogmatic claims of the watchtower is only a first step.

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  DJS

  Snare,

  Eloquently spoken: "Any claims beyond what we have evidence for are nothing more than that to me now, claims. Now I use evidence and critical appraisal to decide what is true for myself and it is the most freeing aspect of being a JW no more."

  I've said this before on this site, but you said it much better. Thanks. The only thing I would add - and it is my only reason for being on here - is that there is a methodology for analyzing evidence and for constructing or dismantling thoughts, ideas, theories and beliefs. Lazy minded people, or those who have never learned how to use their mental faculties to explore, I mean really explore, data, events and words, remain trapped. If the passionate, caring atheists on this site could do one thing, I would imagine it would be that. Remove the mental fetters. You will be surprised what you find; you will like it. A lot.

  Too many theists think we come on here to win arguments or show how smart we are. For me, nothing could be further from the truth.
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  176

  JW refuses to provide wedding stationery to Gay couple

  by KateWild in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  i was outraged at this and had to post it.. http://jehovahswitnessreport.com/blog/jw-refuses-to-provide-wedding-stationery-to-gay-couple.

  i think she is a hypocrite and i bet she sells her invites to fornicators, or does she ask them if they are having sex before marrige, before she takes their money?.

  i was never like this when i was a jw, it's even more disturbing that she is going to ask her elders what to do.

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  DJS

  Every magazine? Really? Every tv show? Really? Nothing like hysterical reactionary comments like this to let us all know where you stand, is there? I have seen a lot of movies recently, read a lot of magazines, lots of tv shows (although to qualify I don't have cable/dish/etc.) and I am completely missing out on this gay agenda thing. I just do not see it. But I suppose when you are obsessed with something you see what you want to see.

  Replace these comments with "I do get my hackles up with the black agenda which is in every magazine, every TV show, ad nausem promoting the black lifestyle and using terms like "racist" against every mother's son who doesn't buy into the black lifestyle." I'm certain there were millions of AOWM in 1964 who were saying the same thing about the civil rights movement. My father was and still is one of these AOWM spouting the same hatred.

  Imagine how gays feel about being overwhelmed with 'straight' and 'hetero' lifestyle ads, tv shows and movies. Or how blacks felt for decades by rarely if ever seeing anything but lily white representations of society in media.

  Keep on talking haters. Keep on using ridiculous, immature, emotional, reactionary and hysterically irrational rationale. You are doing more to educate lurkers than we ever could.
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  31

  Just another thank you to Simon and his wife for this forum

  by nonjwspouse in

  1. forum
  2. announcements

  this site , the people posting, and the ability to connect with them this way has really helped me in such a huge way i can't even express.. thank you for all your time, hard work, and kind efforts to keep this open and safe for all that come in here.. .

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  DJS

  Ditto. I was out of the Borg for 20 years before I thought I had anyting to offer. I'm glad this site exists. Thanks Simon and Ms. Simon. And thanks LisaRose for your kind reminders about site protocol. (Ms. Simon?). I will try to behave better. But it's not my fault; I was drawn this way. I've talked to my therapist (me) about my deep seated need to be a wise ass. My therapist (again, me) tells me that I have to be true to myself but to tone it down some. I will try. ;-)