els

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Posts by els

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  16

  Bizarre Dream

  by els in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i had the strangest dream last night.

  there was a wedding and some of my family was at it.

  afterward we were outside and there was a ufo in the night sky, a long skinny one like the one in the news a few weeks ago.

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  els

  I had the strangest dream last night. There was a wedding and some of my family was at it. Afterward we were outside and there was a UFO in the night sky, a long skinny one like the one in the news a few weeks ago. Then there were more of them and they were shooting these beams of light across the sky. Next things started blowing up and there was a nuclear sort of explosion. I was trying to get people in my family to leave the area but they kept saying that it was Armageddon and that Jehovah would save them. I started shouting that it wasn't Armageddon, that the Bible doesn't say anything about any f...ing UFOs. But they still wouldn't leave so I had to go without them. I woke up this morning feeling depressed and out of sorts. Do any of you have dreams like this? I always have had very symbolic dreams and some that seem to come true. els
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  21

  Question for Everyone

  by Wild_Thing in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .

  are there any other chronic lurkers out there?

  just wondering ...

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  els

  Wild Thing, I think I love you! Love the name anyway.
  I lurked here for about a month before I actually posted. Took me a couple months more to get into chat. Now I'm here almost every day and can't wait for chat to be back. It's a great place, you will learn alot and get so much support here. Tell us your story sometime. I'll be watching for you. els
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  29

  I cried for the past

  by joelbear in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i cried for a long time today, very deeply, sobbing heavily for those i have lost in my life.

  mostly due to watchtower rules.. i am developing a new set of bear friends and look forward to good times with them.. the suicidal thoughts have subsided.. i have never really tried to make a concrete set of friends here.

  i think its time to do so.

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  els

  Joelbear, Don't worry about the tears, I find myself doing the same thing and I usually don't know why. I will be having a pretty good day and then out of the blue I'm just sobbing my heart out. I hope it's just part of the process.
  I'm relieved that you are not feeling as suicidal, it's a really scary thing. I've only ever had sort of stray thoughts about ending it and I've always immediately thought it was nuts. Still the thought was there and it scared the shit out of me. Then I get pissed off that anyone, my family included, could have that kind of power over me.
  So I'm doing the best I can, enjoying my husband and kids, and tentatively reaching out to make new friends. I hope you can do the same. I keep listening to the U2 song "Stuck in a Moment".
  "And if the night runs over
  And if the day won't last
  And if your way should falter
  Along the stormy pass
  It's just a moment
  This time will pass.

  You've got to get yourself together
  You've got stuck in a moment and now you can't get out of it
  Don't say that later will be better now
  You're stuck in a moment and you can't get out of it"
  
  Don't know why but it makes me cry but feel better too. els
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  9

  Kingdom Hall personalities

  by freedom96 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  just as people have different personalities, i believe that individual congregations also had their own personality.. the hall i went to while growing up, was just awful.

  the po of the hall was known in the entire area, and was just a tyrant.

  there were no grey areas.

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  els

  When I was growing up our congregation was one of the fun ones. We had square dances, rollerskating, picnics, swimming, softball, iceskating and sledding. Any excuse for a good party. We had a lot of fun and I thought I had a lot of good friends. All this did make it hard to leave but I never really did believe and there were alot of things wrong that weren't taken care of. So I walked away and found out that despite all the fun, my friends weren't really all that concerned about me.
  Now, years later I'm not DAed or DFed but everyone really knows where I stand and my family shuns me. The congregation is still fun though and the people there now really seem to care about my parents. They take really good care of them. Which makes me pretty certain that even if I could expose the problems with the society they wouldn't consider leaving because it's their whole life and to them it is a good one. els
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  7

  Pink Cloud

  by RubyTuesday in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have notice alot of new people here recently and i am curious as to how you found this site.interested in how some of you "old timers" found it also.

  last may or june i was checking out some chat rooms and for some reason (i always thought how boring) i went into the religion section and saw a chat room title jehovah witness recovery room.

  i was very curious as to what was going on in there (did a bus load of jw get in a crash and now they are recovering??

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  els

  With my family deciding to shun me this summer I started wondering what the official position on this was. I did a search to see what info was out there and I ended up here. I've checked out other sites but I like it here. els
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  14

  Were You Ever Robbed At the Kingdom Hall?

  by Funchback in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  okay, i don't mean by "donating" your hard earned money in the contribution boxes.

  or, by having your purse or pocketbook taken.

  or, by armed, masked men storming into the hall demanding everyone's money and jewelry.

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  els

  This didn't happen at the hall but my husband was ripped off by a "brother" that worked with him. My husband had a small construction business and employed a couple of guys from our hall. He rented a big compressor for a job using a blank check as security. When the job was finished he had one of the guys return the compressor. After a while checks started bouncing in my husbands account. It turned out that this "brother" told the rental company that his boss had decided to buy the compressor, used the blank check and took the compressor home. Shortly after that he quit. We couldn't get it back cause he said he sold it and spent the money so we had to take him to small claims court. I think the total amount was about $700 with overdraft fees included. The "brother" had the nerve to call us and leave a message saying "How could you do this to me? I have two small children to feed." Well we had two small children also. The elders refused to get involved, said it was a personal matter. We never did get all the money back. But this guy ended up being DFed cause his wife caught him with another woman and last we heard he was wanted by the police for something. els
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  19

  I"m Getting too old for this!

  by els in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just worked a 10 hr shift at the restaurant.

  didn't even get a break and had to work by myself tonight.

  i am soooo tired and sore.

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  els

  Ruby, Let me know about your pet peeves. I really should get out of this line of work and find something else but I don't have much schooling and don't know what I would like to do. And everytime I think of leaving this I think about how much money I make. It's hard to walk away from. Maybe when my daughter is done with college (she's in her last year) and when my son figures out what he's going to do. You are right about the juggling act, you have to keep so many things going in your head at once. els
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  48

  Watch your weight

  by JH in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  around christmas time, people tend to eat too much and gain weight.

  do you gain weight easily?

  does it get you mad to see some people eat alot and stay slim?

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  els

  Yes it does make me mad, but it's a fact of my life. My husband and two kids are all 6 ft or more and all slim and they all eat anything they want constantly. It's not like I diet constantly, try that working at an Italian restaurant, but I do try to be careful and I am still overweight. It's very unfair. els
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  19

  I"m Getting too old for this!

  by els in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just worked a 10 hr shift at the restaurant.

  didn't even get a break and had to work by myself tonight.

  i am soooo tired and sore.

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  els

  Thank you all so much. You really lifted my spirits. Someday, when I actually put it in writing, I'll post my Top Ten List of waitresses pet peeves.
  
  Brummie, if you liked that one, here's another: "Lake George - a drinking town with a tourist problem" This is on a T shirt they wear at Christie's, a bar in Lake George, which is just crazy with tourists in the summer. els
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  17

  Music, doesn't it fill such a need :)

  by LyinEyes in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am sitting here listening to my kazaa, finding old songs that i had forgotten i even knew at one time.

  music to me has always been an outlet for expression, even thou the words and music belong to someone eles.

  it can help me to work thru my emotions in ways like no other .

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  els

  I used to wonder if there was anyone with musical talent in the whole org. The Kingdom Melodies were sooo bad! I never had a radio in my room, so I would come up with any excuse to stay home alone so I could listen to what I wanted to on the one downstairs. els