If your mate cheated on you, could you forgive?

avidbiblereader

Very personal and yet it happens way too often, but would you forgive and if you did, how would it change you and the relationship?

Or is it OVER?

abr

Could I forgive? Definitely! Would I forgive? Depends on a lot of different things. Did she admit because she felt bad she was lying to me or did I find it out? Does she take responsibility or is she trying to make it sound like it was my fault? Is she willing to seek couple's therapy? Was this a one-time thing or part of a pattern? What is my intution telling me?

Crumpet

In my 20's no probably not. In my 30's I'd have to ask if I had contributed to this at all and may as a result of my musings forgive. I have been on the receiving end of forgiveness and unforgiveness.

mama1119

Absolutely not. That would be the end.

Actually my husband and I were taking this silly online relationship quiz the other day, and one of the questions was How would you feel if your mate cheated on you and left??...and I checked the box that said I would feel sad for a few days and then move on. He was so hurt that I didn't check the heartbroken box. He said if I left him he would lock himeself in a room and cry and would never be the same. I just don't feel that way...I would not sit around wallowing in self pity over it.

Xena

Of course I could.

under_believer

Crumpet exactly summed up what I was about to post, so:

What Crumpet said.

love2Bworldly

Depends on all the circumstances. I definitely would be open to forgiveness but it really depends.

megsmomma

No....not me, or myhusband. We have always agreed that if either of us cheat....it is over because neither of us would be the type that could trust the cheater ever again. We got married at ages 31 and 34...and we knew darn well what we were getting into and what we each expect from one another.....so, in my case...no way.

found-my-way

it would definitely depend on the circumstances.

I am the type that can forgive him having a one night stand with someone, but not a love relationship behind my back.

I can forgive sex, but I'd be too hurt if he loved someone more than he loved me...I would tell him that I hope he is happy, and then I would move on...