If your mate cheated on you, could you forgive?

by avidbiblereader 106 Replies latest watchtower scandals

  • Xena
    Xena
    Cheaters that I know personally. If you forgive you become a enabler.

    So based on the few and/or many you know EVERYONE falls under that same general statement.

    Oh well I guess the bottom line is knowing what you expect and being open about it.

  • sammielee24
    sammielee24

    Can I ask you this question as a follow through - as a what if?

    What if your mate cheated on you in your relationship/marriage and you didn't know? You didn't find out until after they died but all through your relationship, you felt loved, respected, valued and part of a wonderful team? Would it change the way you felt about them? Or would you instead treasure the value of the relationship that it was? sammieswife

  • PEC
    PEC

    What if your mate cheated on you in your relationship/marriage and you didn't know? You didn't find out until after they died but all through your relationship, you felt loved, respected, valued and part of a wonderful team? Would it change the way you felt about them? Or would you instead treasure the value of the relationship that it was?

    I have a friend that likes to play these games, he will ask something like "If you, your best friend and your wife were on life raft that could only hold two , who would you throw in the ocean? I don't play those games.

    When someone cheats, they change, they treat their mate different. If you don't know you are ignoring the signs. If my mate cheated, I would know. If I ignored the signs and found out after her death that she was cheat ing . Then my relationship was a lie, a sham .

    Philip

  • sammielee24
    sammielee24

    Philip - Geesh..didn't realize you would take it personally...it isn't a game, it was a real question.

    I haven't done it but I've had it done to me in a long past relationship....and it's a question that I asked myself in terms of what I expect, deserve and will allow in a relationship. It's also a very good question to ask yourself about ANY relationship that you have that's important, because it can provide a great deal of insight into who we are as people - not only about cheating in our own. If you found out your father had another family that you didn't know about for example - he died but throughout his lifetime you and he had a wonderful relationship - would it make you hate him, even though you might not know all the reasons why?...........I see no game in asking oneself these questions or in debating them amongst others. sammieswife.

  • onacruse
  • Country Girl
    Country Girl

    He'd be gone.

    CG

  • PEC
    PEC

    Philip - Geesh..didn't realize you would take it personally.

    Not taken personally. If you read my Bio, you will see why, I am not going to respond to second senario.

    Philip

  • funkyderek
    funkyderek

    Would anyone consider alcohol a mitigating factor? Or does that just make it worse?

  • Crumpet
    Crumpet
    Would anyone consider alcohol a mitigating factor? Or does that just make it worse?

    Yes I do! I have never cheated without alcohol.

  • BizzyBee
    BizzyBee

    When a partner in a committed relationship cheats it indicates a fundamental flaw in the relationship. And not likely to be repairable. Lots of couple stay together anyway because their relationship is based on many things other than love and trust. (Such as: children, finances, fear, etc.)

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