Tim Allen says in his insightful book (probably ghost written) that apathy is the opposite of love, not anger.
I'm Not Really Here by Tim Allen ( Mass Market Paperback - Sep 1, 1997)
As long as you feel, you're real.
Who has my Joie d'vivre ? I demand it back right now!!
by Crumpet 63 Replies latest jw friends
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AK - Jeff
Crump - I am going with Ozzie's Tip # 2. That should help restore it.
Jeff
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Gill
((((((((( Crumpet ))))))))))))) Sorry for your anguish!
Now! Start thinking about what YOU want to have in your life. Imagine it! Concentrate on it! Make is a good, happy and positive want! It will come to you! Be it tomorrow, next week, month or year but you WILL find what you want in life is you concentrate on it enough.
Being negative and sad is a waste of time.
You will find love again.
You will be happy again.
Want it and feel it and it will come.
When you find yourself in despair make a conscious effort to stop. Imagine what you want. Nothing in life stays the same. Accept the constant flux and look for the good in everything. Tomorrow you may walk into Mr Right in the street. You may win the lottery or your premium bonds come up. YOu may just get by and pay your bills but always think about what you want and not what you don't want. Fantasies are the beginnings of reality and anything at all is possible.
I don't know if you ever felt that way as a child. One day you realise that absolutely anything is possible if you want it enough, and that is still true.
Go for it, Crumpet! Be positive.... it WILL work out!
Get a load of DJK's 'happy dust'!
You're not alone Crumpet! We're all here for you and it is worrying to see you so sad!
But, nothing is lost that cannot be retrieved, including you joie de vivre!
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delilah
Here's a great big hug for ya, Crumpy.....it will get a little better every day hon. Time heals all wounds....( or wounds all heels )
Do you have some girlfriends you can go out with, just window shop, have a light lunch, a glass of vino? Spend an afternoon just chatting, or go to the movies...You have to keep yourself busy. This way, you have less time to dwell on the negative things that are happening in your life. There will always be bills, so don't sweat them, pay what you can.
Chin up sweetie. It WILL get easier for you. I promise.
Love Dee.
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purplesofa
I remember going through a long depression.
I would wake up in the morning and my first thought was
Oh crap, I am breathing.
Sorry its so tough right now, Have you read anything on grieving? Sounds like you are still going through the process of losing your relationship with Mr. C.
purps
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Mrs Smith
A good book, some divine ice cream a day off work to have a pity party for one. The next day you get up and move on.
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purplesofa
I thought of something else.
In the movie City Slickers, Billy Crystal has lost his smile and has to get it back.
That movie comes back to my mind when I am low and I have to search to get my smile back.
Hope you get yours back soon
purps
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jaguarbass
Where or where is my joy in life gone? How can I bring myself out of this pit?
Tips on a postcard please.
I dont know, the last couple of weeks have been really rough for me. They have taken me to the end of my rope. And I really havent prayed much in the last 5 years, but I prayed the last couple of days for some relief and the ability to cope. And last night I had a good night and they didnt make me work a double shift today, which would have been my holdover day. So I guess I can only live one day at a time and I am thankful that today was a good bearable day.
I guess the tip is to consider praying. I dont know who I prayed to, but they seemed to have answered.
Oh, but I see your asking about joy, the emotion of great delight or happiness caused by something exceptionally good or satisfying; keen pleasure; elation. Thats a tough one. If I have joy it is fleeting. You have to live in the moment and be fortunate enough to do something that you like that is satisfying.
Joy might be related to your brains ability to process the good chemicals to reach the state of elation.
Exercise, If you exercise and feel good about your self your brain will realease the endorphins and you will have elation.
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ninja
crumpy....next time you are up in sunny scotland I'll buy you a wee drink.....emphasis on the "wee"....no not that type of "wee" either....voddy and coke....cheer up mrs....it can only get better....da ninja
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Crumpet
Wow so much to respond to - thank you. I thought bum no one is going to reply to this because it isn't a happy fluffy thread founded on heavy doses of sex. So i underestimated you all.
Purps
Oh crap, I am breathing.
Damn you woman for making me laugh when I shouldnt! That's sorta how I feel too. I think I must go into some kind of hibernation - maybe I have SAD in reverse - ie I get really miserable when its sunny and the evenings go on so long it feels like night never comes with his dark embrace and escapist dreams.
Do you have some girlfriends you can go out with, just window shop, have a light lunch, a glass of vino? Spend an afternoon just chatting, or go to the movies...You have to keep yourself busy. This way, you have less time to dwell on the negative things that are happening in your life. There will always be bills, so don't sweat them, pay what you can.
Delilah - I actually have very few girlfriends now. Know that old thing where one becomes single and the girlfriends you used to have dinner parties suddenly disappear off the face of the earth - like I may snatch their boyfriends away over the cheeseboard! Yeah well and the rest live too far away. So all my local "friends" are guys and well ... they usually dont even wait til the cheeseboard arrives and honestly that just isnt what I want right now. Some smart guy will probably eventually come along and suss that actually maybe I want some non sexual interaction to preceed anything sexual. And with the bills - yes you are right and I am proactively selling my belongings on ebay to pay for them.
Now! Start thinking about what YOU want to have in your life. Imagine it! Concentrate on it! Make is a good, happy and positive want! It will come to you! Be it tomorrow, next week, month or year but you WILL find what you want in life is you concentrate on it enough.
Gill - I do know what I want mostly, but its a long term thing that is going to take quite a while and there's actually no guarantee at all that I can make it happen. That said i am quite motivated towards it and despite my current sloth of spirit I am not giving up. And there are things/people I want that I can't have even if I am very very patient and wait an eternity - though I am tempted out of stubborness to try.
Tim Allen says in his insightful book (probably ghost written) that apathy is the opposite of love, not anger
Jgnat - very insightful - I totally agree with that. I had a very long period of being treated with apathy so i should be happy that that is over. Its so hard to remember. Why is it when you look back you can just remember loads of good stuff. Even the mediocre looks appealing now.
yeah been there...still there some days..,the only hope i can offer is i'm not there every day now
Tijkmo - that makes me really happy to hear you say that - I know how you have suffered and often fretted that I couldn't seem to help you more.
Fifi, Ozziepost (ta for the correction), AK Jeff (explain how the cruise will help my dodgey finances and I'll be on the next boat to bermuda), Gopher and Free2think _ i Do appreciate your kind words. Fifi - I have read some self help books in the past and sometimes they do help you get a different perspective which is helpful. I'm not short on motivation though so thats a positive.
Among those things, Mr C...I sensed this five months ago. I didn't say it then, I'll say it now, I think you loved Mr C more than you were willing to admit, even to yourself. Sitting in a restaurant last week this question came to mind so I wrote it down in my notebook that I carry for the purpose of my book. "Time, does it heal or conceal?" Time does what it does and it's stronger than any reluctance or sheild we hold up to it. In time you will be thinking less of Mr C.
DJK - I think you are very right - time conceals rather than heals. And I do love Mr C and did then, but it was flogging a dead horse and when I initially left I harboured the hope that my absence would perhaps actually bring us together - it was a last resort.