sorry junction guy, i didn't see your last question to me until just now. yes canal place is open. saks fifth ave. is still there. it is still undergoing a face lift as is all of canal street. they are trying to bring it back to the glory it was in the 50's trying to get rid of all the cheesie t-shirt shops and all. donald trump is about to build a upscale high rise. there are a few high rises about to be built. the warehouse district is booming.
I need a girlfriend
by Junction-Guy 94 Replies latest jw friends
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Junction-Guy
That's cool Bigdreaux, I liked everything there from the cheesy T-shirt shops to the upscale.
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bigdreaux
yeah, but, the cheesy was starting to take over. they are starting to go more upscale in most areas. bourbon is still as cheesy and crazy as ever. some things never change.
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Junction-Guy
My big concern was safety and parking. When Amanda and I went there we ended up parking several blocks north of Bourbon Street and walked passed alot of shady characters. The benefits of the Canal St. place was that you got free parking in their garage as long as you purchased something in their shops. The location was really central and not quite as seedy.
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bigdreaux
was that before katrina? because, before, you were smack dap in the hood. your actually lucky you made it out. after katrina, that area has been fenced in and is about to be demolished. it's alot safer now.
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Junction-Guy
Yeah that was 4 months before Katrina, and yes it was a kinda scary area during the day, but there is no way we would have walked back to that lot at night.
I figure the next time I go down there I will park in the Canal place garage and purchase something in order to park there. I also remember the Casino with the beautiful palm trees out front, we didnt go in though.
The Jax brewery mall was cool too. I would definitely like to go back to New Orleans again, I would probably plan it in conjunction with another Texas trip. -
bigdreaux
well, i am trying to get some folks down here for voodoo fest and mardi gras. you can either come then, or, at your own time. i'd love to meet up either way. i know all the good places to go. no matter what your into, i know where you can go for it.
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Junction-Guy
If I were to come, It wouldnt be Mardi Gras, just way too crowded, and motels too expensive and overbooked. I dont know anything about the vodoo fest.
I would definitely love to go again, and there are several options for a road trip Im planning next year. -
bigdreaux
you can check out the voodoo fest here. www.voodoomusicfest.com i have a few people from here coming in for that. if your not interested in that, let me know, there's always something going on here.
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SPAZnik
Plenty of great replies.
I would add:
Why are you letting your circumstances become CONS rather than PROS? First replace the word ISSUES, with CHALLENGES. Turn it into an adventure instead of a pit of despair.
***Separate ("compartmentalize") each facet of your complex situation.
***Separate who you WERE from who you ARE and from who you would like to be.
You seem to be describing yourself based on what you are not moreso than what you are.
I've been there.
A good friend of mine gave me some good advice when she said: You need to create some new memories.
The best way I know of to come out of living in the past is to get busy creating new memories. Start small. Go for a walk down a different path. Literally.
Ever since the first post I read of yours right up to this one, you continually peg yourself in my mind as this "once was almost gay" guy with "other issues as well". I'd love to read just one post where you tell us about yourself without mentioning sexual preference, money problems, religion or politics. I think you've already covered those topics aplenty. That, or go DO something SOCIALLY about your money problems, religious beliefs or political preferences or sexual preferences and then get back to us with some CURRENT stories about what you're DOING about them! When you are busy DOING, actions speak for you.
Even better, see what free stuff goes on in your community (call up your library or run a search online) and go to one of those events and just practise making small chat with people. Give yourself permission to leave your problems from the past at the door for an hour while you socialize in the present. Enjoy it for whatever small moments come out of that. Be grateful for the small stuff. Take interest in OTHER people's issues rather than getting all caught up in your own. Appreciate the efforts people have put into creating an event in the now for your enjoyment.
I went to a coffee shop recently and they had a little book sitting out about how to save the world for $10. It was a light read and full of fun easy cheap and free suggestions on stuff to do to make a difference in the world. One of the ideas was to get to know your own neighbors. It didn't even require much of a conversation. Just "hi, I'm so and so, here's my phone number in case you ever need to borrow a cuppa." or whatever floats your boat. haha). (I'm not recommending dating your neighbors, let me be clear.)
***Separate your feelings of loneliness from your desire to mate.
Loneliness and a desire to mate are two very different things. People can be just as lonely whether they are in a relationship or not. Own your feelings of loneliness. Feel them. Take responsibility for handling them. Don't put it on someone else to handle them. Think of a few ideas for reducing/managing your "loneliness". Get a pet. A goldfish if nothing else. Not only is it nice to have another heartbeat around, as well as being a good topic for conversation (people find common ground in caring for animals) it's great to have something outside of yourself to think and care about. Go outside right now and select a pet rock if nothing else. Name it. Take it whereever you go. Recheck this thread. There seems to be an opportunity to make friends with some people that are going camping. Offer your services setting up and/or taking down camp and/or cooking or whatever you can in exchange for camping fees. Negotiate honestly about your situation and make sure the other parties are happy that they are getting a fair deal. The more the merrier.
Do some things to take the edge off the loneliness so you smell more self-assured than desparate.
Coming on here is a good start, but find some things to do in person with people. Do you know how cool I find it when people say, "lets hang out, I can't afford to spend much money right now cause I'm tackling this or that financially, but lets hang out. There's this great park we could walk in or let's kick a soccer ball around or I'll bring the thermos of coffee", or whatever. Get creative. GIVE WHATEVER YOU'VE GOT TO GIVE. It's amazing how a cup of tea can be turned into a party. Or a pair of running shoes can be turned into a neighborhood adventure. Find a park bench and people watch with a pal.
Volunteer your time with your church or community. Don't go for the first opportunity, look around for all available volunteer positions and pick the one you like most. Make sure the position will be one involving interaction with other volunteers.
Go to a debtors anonymous meeting, or some free financial support place supplied by the government. Maybe you will meet someone in the same boat so to speak, who will be totally on the same financial page, interested in responsibly bettering your financial situations, AND interested in doing low-cost stuff for rest and rejuvenation. Using financial reasons as an excuse not to socialize is only making things worse. Look at it as a way to weed out the gold-diggers if you must. Practise being HONEST about your situation. There is a beauty in honesty that will attract the right people to you. People that are more interested in having a relationship with your money than in having a relationship with you will move on when you tell them the truth. Focus only on the people that stick around. People that lack compassion for your own peculiar plight in life will move on. DO something you know you need to do about your financial situation and then when the topic of money comes up you can be POSITIVE about it when you say you've been taking steps to improve your plight. Positive is attractive.
And how about practising not talking about your ISSUES much at all for a conversation or two? How about practising some compassion for OTHER people's "issues"??? How about focussing on a strength or two? Even better, how about practising creating new memories with people. Memories of moment's that have everything to do with playful enjoyment of right now, rather than a focus on past burdens?
One last thing. It's understandable that you want to be honest about who you are and some of the things you are struggling with. It's even somewhat understandable why you might fear that people won't understand where you are coming from. How about giving people the benefit of the doubt? How about treating them like they WILL understand you or at least get the gist of where you are coming from and maybe even have some comparable experiences themselves?
Interacting with people as people (EVERYONE has a story) rather than as holes you are potentially going to stick it in might improve things for you on a social level.