So I was df'd for living with/having sex with my boyfriend for 3 years and then not ending the relationship and moving out within the week between the first meeting of confession and the second meeting where they tell me what their decision was. I did move out 3 months later with the intent of being reinstated over a period of time. Well I couldn't cut off the relationship with my bf even though I did move out, so I married him after a year and then 2 weeks after that I slept with someone else.
But I want to get reinstated and I need to know if I need to confess that I committed adultery to the elders when I do request reinstatement. Will they expect me to tell my husband? From what I've researched, I see that I am required to confess this to my husband if I'm a member of the congregation but it doesn't say that I have to if I'm disfellowshipped. Also, the info says that the elders will not accept that I am repentent if I don't confess to my husband. Disfellowshipping completely severes the tie with the congregation, so my action of adultery doesn't affect the congregation negatively.
So my question is not for the sake of just getting reinstated because I know how to do that - I've been through the process before. I need to know that if I want to salvage a relationship with Jehovah, is that what is expected?