by sd-7 111 Replies latest jw friends
It wasn't even an affair, cyber. He AND HIS WIFE had sex before getting married. YEARS AGO!
It wasn't years ago.
Good to hear from you dear heart...will be thinking of you tomorow evening. You're educated and intelligent enough to unload with both barrells, even on the oh, so high and mighty CO. Do what is best for you.
thanks for keeping us updating. i'm glad you were able to see that the elders are just men...stupid, perverted, far from perfect men. that's all they will ever be and you should not have to give in to their condescending questioning and judgements. a does not equal c in this case, for they are NOT god and should be ashamed to call themselves his ministers.
i hope everything turns out to your satisfaction and that you can get some peace of mind from all of this. keep hanging in there.
SD-7,
I didn't know there was an issue with your relationship to your wife previous to your marrying her. They will dip you in mud and sling.
The few entries I read of yours told me that you are learning True Bible doctrine on your own. I think the Holy Spirit is teaching you just as Jesus said He would. The elders have more concern for your ideas than what you did.
I got blacklisted for giving correct answers at the WT study. They will likely DF you for having learned from the Bible itself but they will announce your name and shame you with a label of being immoral so that pubs won't get curious about what you learned that caused you to turn traitor on the WT org.
I was DF’ed years ago for getting remarried (we both had grounds to divorce our previous mates) but I wore a big fluffy beard and they couldn’t allow that so labeling me an “adulterer“, “bigamist” and “father of bastards” was their chosen tactic. I mentioned the beard as being an issue and they assured me it wasn’t. They were dispassionate and businesslike - no emotions - which irked me greatly because I knew they were addicted to the power they had over us. When I met with a trio of Elders to get reinstated I was told to shave my beard to prove I was repentant. I got so mad I stood and left with enough force to plow down an NFL lineman.
In the Mosaic law, if an unmarried man seduced an unmarried woman he had to pay the bride price and marry her.
Exodus 22:16,17
Laws about Seduction
"When a man seduces a virgin who was not promised in marriage, and he has sexual relations with her, he must certainly pay the bridal price for her to be his wife. If her father absolutely refuses to give her to him, he must pay an amount in silver equal to the bridal price for virgins. - (Holman Christian Standard Bible)
That is because God knew that passions would overcome many people who love each other. He did not ordain stoning or castration. Pay up, get married.
The Witchtower can’t understand the idea that God is love. They can read the words out loud then hit you in the head with a New World Transylvania Reference Edition.
I agree how learning first hand about the true nature of JWs heavy handedness and unfairness is eye opening. Defend yourself then run. If you make them angry they will get spiteful or worse.
These reasons made me free my conscience and investigate Christian Churches. I am a Baptist and can’t say enough good about my choice. My wife viciously opposed me then joined me and is a Baptist too as are 4 others in our Family. It might not be fun but this JC thing is going to help you justify getting free.
Love and Blessings,
Fuzzy
I was under the impression this was an apostasy charge. They are pursuing premarital activites? Maybe I misunderstood but I thought your wife was dfed when you guys married? Is she at risk of df again? Or are they pursuing you?
My wife confessed our premarital activities to the elders when she became active again after years of inactivity, resulting in a private reproval.
My wife confessed our premarital activities to the elders when she became active again after years of inactivity, resulting in a private reproval.
That is the usual MO in that situation...as long as there are no other circumstances surrounding it. If no one else suspected or knows, then usually it results in private reproof. If others know or if rumors are rampant, then maybe public reproof.
sd-7 did mention that it seemed that the elders were concerned more at keeping the reputation of the congregation clean instead of their 'spiritual' well-being.
Also muddying up the waters is the fact that they know something's up with sd-7 as far as having doubts and questions. They'll use one situation as a pry tool on the other situation. In their eyes, and eventually they'll communicate this to his wife, his 'weakness' is directly related to his/their past sins.
It sounds like, from his despcription, that he's dealing with a particularly over zealous bunch of asshole elders. To put themselves on the same level as God Almighty and to declare that their tribunals are to prove that no one can get away with anything is not the actions of loving, merciful men wanting to help but more like power hungry little men bent on proving how tough and powerful they are.
In my case my wife said no one else knew of it and that it happened a few times. The reality is at least 2 others knew of it (non-JW's) and it happened in excess of 20 times.
The reality is at least 2 others knew of it (non-JW's) and it happened in excess of 20 times.
Aww...you're just braggin now...
LOL Seriously though, the hypocrisy there made me crazy. If she felt the need to dive headfirst back into "Jehovah's organization" and look to these 'shepherds'...if she truly believed it was the one and only truth then tell all. Instead she revealed enough to ease her conscience and get them to show her 'mercy'.
Just for clarification, when did you get married, sd-7? I was under the impression it was some time ago but Jamie indicates it wasn't. Not that it matters to me, but it would illustrate how these elders chase down stuff from the past.
