by moshe 132 Replies latest jw friends
Daniel-P- for someone who is such a polished writer, I would have expected an insult from you that would have avoided violating TOS#1.
CL- I do like your approach- bring the magazines over to my house- If all the JW admitted how unhappy they are, that would be a start, but they keep that a secret and suffer depression in secret.
Can't fade because you can't lie to yourself? People who leave and are shunned are just getting what they deserve for being involved in a cult?
Strange statements. I have not attended in years because the meetings made me physically ill to sit through. Still, I don't begin to believe that the way I chose to leave is the only or best way to do things.
The very definition of a cult involves mind control and mental/emotional abuse. Why would you blame the victims rather than the abusers?
Life goes on and I truly appreciate the time I have to sift through my thoughts/feelings without the filter of thought control. I am not afraid of the watchtower and they truly no longer control my beliefs in anything. That does not mean I have no regard for other's feelings or beliefs.
I am certainly not anyone's doormat, neither would I give such a label to anyone on here. Regardless of the way they choose to handle their exit, it's none of my business.
I am just not interested in causing a stir. I just don't care. I just want to live my life, and I don't care what others do. Maybe, I am just lazy but I can't be bothered. And I am still figuring it all out. If I'm ever going to protest anything,it will be something I truly care about, like the environment, or to end dog fighting. And I'm a quiet person, so I want my exit to be quiet. If that makes any sense.
Being, "not afraid of the WT" or the elders is indeed real freedom. Congratulations, C-L.
I had an email today from a JWN member- they we not JW's, but they had an adult child who was a recent convert. He was afraid to post a comment out of fear his child would see it, recognize them as a their parent and begin shunning them for being involved with apostates. Imagine that- the WT can even intimidate non-JW's.
Thanks, Moshe. It does not surprise me that these parents of a new convert are scared of alienating their adult child. When someone is a new recruit, they are taught their family will turn against them. With the help of the devil, of course.
Best thing they could do is to enlighten themselves on cult behavior. Dealing with someone who has accepted that every thought must be in compliance with a high control group is not something that most people even think about. I feel for them.
If you asked a JW fader to write a letter to the local newspaper (and sign it) exposing the evils of shunning by the WT org, they will have to decline,- if you ask them to help distribute flyers or hold up a sign at an assembly exposing any number of WT evils, they will decline. If you ask a fader to join an ex-JW meetup at a local r
You are a good fighter, but screw you, Moshe. The WT isn't the only fight, it's just one near and dear to many of us. There are many fights that need to be fought. Relatively speaking, The Watchtower is less important than the hangnail on my middle finger.
BTS
ROTFLOL @ BurnTheShips
The consequences of leaving can be very painful and heartbreaking. The consequences of not leaving is far worse than I could ever imagine.
I didn't leave the moment I realized I was in a cult. Instead I continued my fade and married a jw. I now have a baby girl with my jw wife. Think about those consequences. Though it is now well known that I am not a witness, there is a significant risk of my baby girl becoming a cult member due to the influence of my wife and family. I was a fucking dormat and now it will be my fault if my child becomes a jw. It would have been much easier to simply lose my family.
I think the problem here was not "fading" but marrying a jw...not quite the right direction for a "fade."
While I don't agree with the general statement that faders are doormats, Highlander is making a statement that he feels like a doormat. I recognize and acknowledge that feeling in him. He just offers a balanced view for those that stay "in" a longer time than necessary and make compromises (like marrying a dub) in order to fit in with family/friends or personal views.
Some would be better off taking a stand, walking away loudly, burning that bridge.
It's just that each of us in in our own situation and have different goals.
