by moshe 132 Replies latest jw friends
Moshe,
As you have been on this board for 5 years, surely you would realise that a great number of posters here were born into the JW, and thus had little to no choice in being a JW.
If you’d kept this point in mind when you posted your original post, perhaps the responses to you would have been more tempered.
But you didn’t, and they weren’t.
Oh well.
I love you too Gregor.
But seeing you don't want to let it drop I will just add:
This comment:
I guess the main reason I couldn't fade was I couldn't lie to myself. It seems to me that I am in the minority here on that one.
did remind me a little of Luke 18, you know the bit where the Pharisee thanks God that he is not a sinner like all the others.
y
OK, let me make sure I've got this straight. I'm a 3rd Generation JW with hard-core Uber-dubs (missionaries, Bethelites, Special Pioneers, etc. ) on both sides of the family. So Moshe gives me a special dispensation. Phew!! Glad I've received a sliver of approval.
Hold on a minute.
How about the 1st generation JW couple who accepted the virus because the dubbies came calling right after they lost their toddler in death and were swept into the cult via love bombing and the hope of seeing their little one pet tigers eternally? They almost lose their marriage and take a couple of decades for the pain of losing their child to numb a bit. (Not a hypothetical case, BTW.) Now they begin to see the light and decide to fade. Why are they any less morally entitled to fading than me?
om
Back to my original assertion- faders are a doormat. How many faders have denied that? Forum members have tried to explain why they don't do this or that, family concerns , why they have been fading here since 2002,2003,etc and still they go to the meetings and sit through the drivel, turn in fake time, and pretend to be weak JW's, even elders no less, but are still JW's on the WT roster who don't publicly oppose the false WT teachings. -Just so they don't get the Df'd, Da'd or apostate label. Now, did I miss something? Is it possible to be a long term fader and not be a doormat to the KH/elders?
As I said I don't go to any meetings, no conventions or assemblies, neither funerals, weddings, baby showers, nor turn in fake time, don't pretend to be a weak jw. my card is still in their box where all the cards of da'd and df'd jws from that congregation still are. Yes, I post under the name Blondie but then many da'd and df'd jws on this board don't use their real name either. I don't see that any good will come out of this judging and name calling except to identify those doing it with the very group they say they left and fight against.
Blondie (consider myself a fader because I am neither da'd or df'd)
moshe - regarding my post on page 3, I misunderstood where you were coming from. You are talking of people who stay with the WT, despite knowing it is a fraud, and pretend to believe.
My apologies.
Thanks for your measured and polite reply.
Obviously, I am no longer a fader. This is my picture here with 4 siblings (it may not be very clear) and my real name. I know how hard it is to be a "fader" as I was long ago, that was before the Internet time and long ago in many ways with my own unique set of circumstances. I know how hard it was. At least the faders have left JWs in heart and mind. That is a big accomplishment of itself. I do believe in time most will become quite vocal.
I have total respect for "faders" having to wait on a marriage partner or because of aging parents or grown children. Hopefully, in time they can be public. Hopefully, marriages open up to real truthfulness with each other or in time the marriage wanes to no communication besides the weather, and eventually ends. Sometimes the JW aging parent opens up realizing their grown child has their own life and the JW aging parent needs them regardless or, the JW grown child grows to realizing they must have some contact and natural concern for their parent. I have seen the long term of many cases.
Hmm. Should we define different types of faders? Or have we already?
I was born-in. I would consider myself a fader simply because I haven't DA'd or been DF'd. I stopped attending meetings, I have refused to meet with the elders, and in conversation with others I have asserted my right to educate myself and make informed decisions.
I can't imagine how awful it must be to continue to attend meetings year after year, knowing what I know. Everyone has their reasons for doing what they do - and some are really putting themselves through a lot for the sake of family and others. I hope things work out for all of you, regardless of your chosen method of leaving.
My family has been in the Truth™ for a Century.
I'm not going to give them all the finger just because I don't agree with the Society anymore.
nobody likes a quitter
