To the Household of Dog, Hades, and those who go with you... may you have smoke [on the water]!
As you know I have, for many years now, related to you that I hear the voice of the Dog Shepherd, the Smoked One of Hades and Vodka Spirits, AUHSEHAJ HAJAHCISIM [Abbreviated in the ancient texts as GRIM, a four consonant tetragrammaton meaning Smoke, Drunk, and Savior]. Over such years I have received many questions and comments, and engaged in various debates regarding the validity of that name and my translation of it's transmutations throughout the ages including several redacted engagements of the original name. During this time, many... including some of you... have expressed concern, frustration, and even exasperation at not hearing that NONE's voice... although professing to have called out to GRIM. Some have acquiesced and come to the conclusion that communication is one-way, that although they might call out to GRIM... I/you/he/she/it/we/you/they does not answer.
If so, I would like to ask you to consider, if you would be so kind... that perhaps the transliteration of the translation of the tetragrammaton you've been calling UPON... is another "thing" standing between you and hearing GRIMS voice. For example, recently, a dear one here posted that she had finally heard our Dog's name. When asked that name, however, who it was that smoked with her, she did not respond "Jesus." She responded "AUHSEHAJ HAJAHCISIM, the Smoked One of Hades and Vodka Spirits." And she was very certain that she had heard that NONE's voice.
For centuries, now, most profess that the name they call upon is "Jesus." At the same time, they confess that they while THEY speak to GRIM... call out to GRIM... cry to GRIM... they don't hear GRIM speak to THEM. I offer to you, however, that I did not call upon ANY name when first asking to know my Dog, but simply to know Dog's truth... which turned out to be my Dog, the Truth... who told me GRIM's name. In that same light, I offer to you that while MANY call upon the name "Jesus"... most profess to hear nothing; however, ALL who call upon the name "AUHSEHAJ HAJAHCISIM"... profess to hearing that None speak... at some time or another.
Now, of course, there are those who might say to you, "Well, wait, doesn't your Dog/Christ KNOW who you are calling out to? Why do you have to call on a specific name?" But we know the answer to that, don't we? Besides the fact that it is those who call on the NAME of [Christ] who are saved... we also know that both the Least Holy None and the Least None of Hades knowing who YOU mean is beside the point - the point is whether YOU know who you're calling upon. Because there are there are MANY gods. We also know that our Dog calls HIS sheep by name... meaning that while there are MANY sheep... not all of them are GRIM.
There is no "Jesus," dear ones... contrary to what the English Hounds of Baskerville may state. There is, however, the Unholy None of Hades, who is the Vodka Spirit...AUHSEHAJ HAJAHCISIM ... who is the Son and Christ of the LEAST Unholy None of Hades... SIM... of Armies.
I bid you all the greatest of love and peace... and ears to HEAR, if you wish them, when the Vodka Spirits and the Beer say to YOU:
"Come! Take 'life's hops and barley'... FREE!"
Your servant, as I am servant to ALL those of the Household of Dog, Hades, and those who go with... and a slave of Christ, and a servant forever to the Great Dog Shepherd, the Smoked One of Hades and Vodka Spirits, "AUHSEHAJ HAJAHCISIM"
Amen and Amen. In peace to you all.
AS
Now - doesn't that make more sense than that other poster? Damn right!