Did you know, Shelby, that anger and rage can be an addiction? It's true. There are people that HAVE to feed their anger, and so they LOOK for things that will incite it. Then, they explode...
Hoo-weee, I most certainly DO know, dear JO (the greatest of love and peace to you, dear one!). I learned it with my ex... even put it to the test. For some reason, he always had to "sabotage" things when our little family had a moment of... well, let's say, exuberance. For some time I kept thinking, "What the heck did I/the kids do NOW?" And then I left the WTBTS (omigawd, and all of the "Woe, is me" schleprock-y doom and gloom there! )... and decided to "test" him.
So, one day he went into his "mood," and I just cranked up my joy! OMIGOSH... I promise you he literally VIBRATED with angst and anger - LOLOLOLOLOLOL! Seriously, you know how they say someone "Hit the roof"?! Well, he didn't, of course, but I would swear (if I swore) that there was a Boeing 747 in our house - you could literally FEEL the "engines" - LOLOLOLOL!
Well, I'm a pretty upbeat, life is good, don't sweat the small stuff... kind of person, so very soon after that I decided, "Okay, enough of you." That, along with some other bull-pucky drew me to the conclusion that, "Uh-uh, you need to step." One of the last things I told him was, "You should have KNOWN when I left that WTBTS that your days were numbered and it was only a matter of time." Had to get that "dark cloud" outta my house!
{{{{ Shudder}}}}} Ugh! Just THINKING about all that "heavy"... blame-everybody-but-myself-for-my-choices-and-so-my-screwed-up-life-so-I'll-just-kick-the-dog... kind of presence... gives me the WILLIES! And his life wasn't even screwed up! We actually had a good life - he owned his own company and made GOOD money - but he was just too STOOPID to realize it 'cause... well, he couldn't BLAME anyone for his life being GOOD - LOLOLOLOLOL!
They then release the stress and feel better for awhile till they start looking for their fix again. I'm not making this up.
Oh, no, dear one - I absolutely believe you. I DID research it, during and after, and learned that it's almost like sex for some... even better, actually, for others (you know, those who have "trouble" in that area. Gotta take that 'stuff' out on SOMEONE, right? Funny... it's usually single guys, recently separated/divorced guys, uber-dominant... or completely dominated guys. I've never seen any of the "life really IS good" guys I know go through this. They don't even go there. In fact, they're always trying to talk these idjits "down." And for those who think I'm "picking" on guys... please... I'm not. Lots of "testosterone" issues going on in this world. Women just tend to express the same "frustration" through things like screaming and tears. Or total silence. Or strapping the kids in the car which she then drives into the lake - after she gets out, of course).
You can find lots of information by researching "anger addiction" or "Intermittent Explosive Disorder".
I'll take a look, dear one, but I'll tell you now it'll be quite brief. Because I've been there and done that with that whole syndrome and don't intent to "live" another second of it ever again, even if it's only through the pages of a book. Too much for me. My life is so calm, cool, quiet, and tranquil. Coming here is really the only "noise" in it (well, and the recent "mutiny" at work. Sigh. But I can handle that - it's business...).
PEACE, dear JO... and THANK you for letting me vent... and giving me a HUGE laugh - I needed it!
Your servant and a slave of Christ,
SA