I am a promoter of Safe Sex..as long as you practice that do as you please..
I just watched a movie called HIV positive..I don't want anyone to end up like that..
Snoozy..
Open relationships, polyamory and swinging
by techdotcom 104 Replies latest social relationships
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techdotcom
Snoozy, you bet, that's a good idea no matter what. Both of us are always prepared, lol
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AudeSapere
Techdotcom - I'm curious about your age group. Not wanting to pry too far or presesnt info that could identify you, would you mind sharing the general age group of you and your wife. (ie: under 25, 30-something, 40's, 50's, over 60).
-Aude.
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Broken Promises
One advantage I see to the arrangement is that it brings more men back into the game. There's a serious man drought on at the moment.
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techdotcom
She is 37 and I am 39.
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techdotcom
Oh and IDing us isn't a huge deal we are out of the religion and most of our friends are in the know about our being open as well.
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jamiebowers
I think that making love is an art, and it takes years to perfect. My husband and I have been together for almost 16 years, and although that part of our lives is great, I still think any time spent on intimacies should be with each other and no one else. To each his own.
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Aussie Oz
So while she has had quite a bit of affirmation and fun, I have as yet to get past making out with anyone but her. That has been frustrating as hell, to hear "Well you are a great guy but I just don't like getting in the middle of a marriage and causing problems." and variations of that same sentiment...
I think you are experiencing the reality of the fantasy. Not all it's cracked up to be.
Herein lies the delema of all swingers and swinging clubs...
having had a look at adds for these events (often in the 'personals' of a newspaper) , i note a very interesting point:
Ladies welcome on their own, men must bring a lady.
Thats because all the guys want to bang the ladies, but the ladies choose who does...
my two cents worth...
oz
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mrsjones5
So while she has had quite a bit of affirmation and fun, I have as yet to get past making out with anyone but her. That has been frustrating as hell, to hear "Well you are a great guy but I just don't like getting in the middle of a marriage and causing problems." and variations of that same sentiment...
I think you are experiencing the reality of the fantasy. Not all it's cracked up to be.
Nice catch Oz
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techdotcom
I think you are experiencing the reality of the fantasy. Not all it's cracked up to be.
Not to be too much of a smart ass but that was my point, to share the reality. What is your point about that? What experiance can you share. Or are you once agian simply looking for something negative to harp on. There's nothing to catch, I put that out there. I am open in more ways then just with sex. I am an open book in almost every way. Generally swingers clubs admit unescorted women for free, couples for a nominal cover and single men an exorbent price. I am enjoying learning more about the dynamics of all of this and although I do feel some frustration at times, it is mostly due to my lack of interpersonal skills and not some disatisfaction with our choices. Are there negative emotions at times with this, yes, but I believe in examining those and determining the root of them. At that point I can work on handling that in a mature way, rather than simply avoiding what might be uncomfortable at times. My wife and I use the same skills for dealing with issues with the lifestyle that we used when surviving the religion, and honestly this stuff is small potatoes compared to the stresses that being in that caused.
Now if you want to provide some actuall anedotal examples of negative sides to this and explore those stories to see how they apply in general than I am all for it. But to be honest much of the comments here seem to be knee jerk judments on what is our choice. To be fair I did put our story out here, exposing it to such, but that doesn't mean I will simply take unsupported critisism with out an argument.
It's funny how people will use critical thinking to explore thier religious beliefs to escape a cult like the JW's but at the same time ignore this valuable tool for other parts of thier lives, and often just seem to settle into another stagnant belief/moral system that has no objective reality to it.