Does the use of sex toys by a marriage mate constitute a form of porneia, thus forming scriptural grounds for divorce?
In ancient times, it is evident that objects of an idolatrous, immoral nature were designed for use in sexual immorality. For example, worshippers of Baal of Peor often designed idols that resembled the male sex organ. The fertility goddess Ashtoreth was also worshipped by means of depraved sex practices. (Num. 25:1-3;1 Kings 11:5) Jehovah expressed quite clearly how he felt about these practices by executing unfaithful Israelites who fell prey to the seductive practices of the surrounding nations. (Num. 25:7-9) Sadly, the Israelites repeatedly failed to heed God's commands, and as a result, lost Jehovah's favor as a people. This serves as a sobering lesson for Christians today: sexual immorality--which can include brazen, depraved, unclean conduct--has no place in Jehovah's organization. (1 Cor. 10:8, 11)
Since 1914, Satan the Devil and his demons have been confined to the vicinity of the earth. (Rev. 12:9, 12) This fact has resulted in widespread increase in immorality on a scale that far outweighs the sins of the pagan nations in existence during Bible times. This should not surprise us, as the demons were amongst the first to initiate unnatural, immoral conduct when they left their proper dwelling places in heaven to take wives upon the earth in the pre-Flood era. (Gen. 6:2; Jude 6, 7) Demonic influence is evident in the flood of sickening, grossly immoral pornography and TV shows and music that promote, condone, and glorify sexually perverse practices. It is also evident in the use of "toys" designed purely for the purpose of sexual gratification. How so?
In imitation of the sinful practices of pagan nations of old, today there are many different kinds of items used to "spice up" one's sexual desires--often without the aid of one's scripturally given marriage mate. Some might reason that such behavior is harmless--or even that one's marriage mate could participate in using these "toys"! Is this sound reasoning? Would it be reasonable to conclude that your marriage mate should eat garbage because you choose to? Of course not! So why would we conclude that it is appropriate for a Christian man or woman to use "toys" to stimulate themselves or their marriage mate sexually when Jehovah has provided only one means for proper sexual satisfaction, the marriage bed? (1 Cor. 7:2, 3) Really, would such conduct be keeping the marriage bed "without defilement"? (Heb. 13:5)
Yet, even confronted with clear Bible counsel to avoid the use of sex "toys", some might reason that this is no more serious than the unclean habit of masturbation, which is clearly condemned in the Bible. (Col. 3:5, 6) Is this necessarily the case? No, for an element of idolatry has now been directly introduced, by means of, in many cases, using an item that resembles a sex organ! Is not the person who uses such "toys", in effect, worshipping them as a sex idol? Really, are they not engaging in what amounts to Baal worship, sacrificing to the demons themselves? (1 Cor. 10:20, 21) Enveloped in demon worship, then, such an act now escalates from what may have been an unclean act of masturbation to a much higher degree--gross uncleanness. (Eph. 4:17-19) Therefore, since such depraved behavior, if practiced unrepentantly, would be a disfellowshipping offense, and it would constitute a significant danger to a loyal Christian mate's integrity, it would be at least appropriate grounds for separation due to the spiritually dangerous nature of the offense.
If perhaps another person, not the offender's mate, became involved, using the "toy" to stimulate such a person, it would definitely become a form of porneia and be classified as adultery, thus entitling the offended mate to obtaining a Scriptural divorce and being free to remarry "in the Lord" if he or she so decided. However, each situation is different, and it would not be reasonable for Jehovah's organization to make decisions for each married couple in this situation. With prayer and careful research, as well as loving direction from the elders, the offended mate alone must decide. (Gal. 6:5)
All such matters are to be left in the hands of Jehovah God, the Supreme Judge. We are thankful to him that he continues to keep his organization clean. May we humbly submit to his direction in this and all matters and thus remain as part of his clean people.--Ps. 19:7-11; 2 Cor 7:1.