The Impact of Leaving (page 3)

nugget

I recognized some of the symptoms listed. It is hard not to feel misled and manipulated and there is the additional complication that you are launched into the world you have been taught to be suspicious of for decades and have to rebuild a life. However that being said there is opportunity to build a happier life we have found this to be the case. There is so much to be grateful for and a chance to make real choices.

Botzwana

For me it has been ALOT easier. It is because I moved to another country while still a witness. Then I faded where really no one knows me. All the brothers in the states think I am still in and since I do not have to see them I do not get badgered. Marrying a worldlyite has helped in tremendous ways. It has been a year now and I feel really good. For those that really want to fade moving away is a great thing to do. Start over with new friends etc. I feel so confident now that I could go back to where I was originally from and tell them off right now. Why? Because being away for these past 5 years, I do not feel close to any of them anymore.

noni1974

I'm of the 20%. Mostly because I had an instinct when I was younger that it was BS and I never bought into it like most EX JW's did. Once I made the decision to leave that was it. I moved on, all on my own. It wasn't until 7 years after I left that I found the EX JW boards and that was only because I was having an issue with an elder at my uncles death bed. Now it is 7 years after that and I'm still doing fine. In fact I'm better than fine.

I think that the more a person believed the JW's had the truth, directly relates to how good or bad they emotionally come out of an exit. I think a lot of these issues relates to guilt and self hatred for believeing something they now see as a lie. I always say the hind sight is 20/20, and people should try not to be angry with themselves or others for falling for this cults line of BS. I'm sure if people could go back in time with the knowledge they have now none of us would fall for this cults line of BS.

Mickey mouse

There are many factors that influence how much of a toll exiting will take on an individual. Some of these are family circumstances, past personal investment in the religion, personality and mental state.

For me the toll has been great and is ongoing. It's not that I haven't had other serious things in life to deal with, I have. But, I would rate all of those as comparatively insignificant when compared with the mind f*** of coming to terms with learning the truth about the truth and the implications on my life and relationships.

Your mileage may vary.

Quendi

Thank you so much, leavingwt, for posting this list. I will be sharing the URL of this thread with my own small support group here in Colorado. One member's husband calls us JWA for "Jehovah's Witnesses Anonymous" and while we do not have a formal twelve-step program, the symptons listed have afflicted all of us to varying degrees and our support group has been a lifeline for us.

I had my first contact with Jehovah's Witnesses back in 1968 while spending a summer with Witness relatives. I renewed that contact in 1971 and then had a formal study after I left home for college in 1974. I got baptized in January 1976. So this religion consumed more than half my life, and while I had many good times and met some wonderful people, it was only after I was disfellowshipped and subsequently decided never to return that I could look back and see how badly damaged and abused I was.

I am now in what I call my "detoxification stage" and am beginning to realize, like sizemik, that the process is ongoing and will take some years to complete. This forum has been a wonderful resource for me, and I have discovered other places in cyberspace that have been very helpful also. I want to encourage those who are just beginning to question or have already decided to leave the organization to take advantage of all that is available to them to aid in their journey. It is well worth it because life outside the organization is far better than what it was inside.

Quendi

wha happened?

This describes my wife

yesidid

Apart from individual personalities, I think time spent in, whether or not one is a"born in", and how old one is when leaving all have a bearing on how long it takes to become mentally and emotionally free.

Particularly "how old one is when leaving".

Brad Wilson

I am only glad that I was not raised a witness, but doing anything for 34 yrs is sure to leave a scar or two. Just so so glad to be outside the bubble now. Thx LWT, great post.

Brad

sabastious

marking

PaintedToeNail

I'm working on 'the list' too. I feel alienated and lonely...but I can't seem to force myself to do what they want me to do, which is tow the line and preach the word. The thought of breaking the hearts of my throughly deluded parents is almost impossible for me to comprehend, so I try to non-combatant-like when around them. It is really, really difficult, as I love them very much and they are already 'grieving' over having lost one of my siblings from the 'truth'.

CJ

The Impact of Leaving

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