I may have a few words to add here...
First - to Terry - Good Luck with your search. I believe that you will find someone - eventually. You may have to kiss a few frogs before you find your Princess.
I am currently married, to a wonderful woman that I met through one of the internet dating sites (Match . com). I had signed up with about two sites, and put up a profile - just to see what was out there. Not much locally.
Occasionally, I would spring for a months' membership, just to be able to send messages to the ladies that were on the site. The problem then was that many of them weren't members, and so couldn't respond (unless I gave them my private e-mail - which I did in a few cases).
I sent out many many e-mails... "You look like a nice woman - I would like to get to know you - etc." I got very few - if any replies.
One advantage that I found early on was being able to 'filter' out various features that I didn't want in a potential girlfriend. Most of the time, a woman's body-size was not a factor - not to me. It seems that women focus too much on their body-size, feeling inadequate if they are not shaped like a model or look like a famous movie star. This - to me - was low on my priorities. (Evidenced by my "... breathing, a must..." line that my wife chuckled about when she read it in my profile)
What was more important to me was non-smoker, age-appropriate (not someone half my age - although initially it seems like a good idea, there would be very little in common), height (which may sound shallow, but I was married to a woman who was 5'2", and this meant having shelves and other items in the home placed low enough for her to reach - or she needed a step-stool - plus, I noticed that women specified men taller than themselves, too), and other things.
Once I added the 'within 5 years younger than myself' and limited the distance to within 30 to 50 miles... this pretty much narrowed the selection of available women down to about 50 or 60 choices.
From that, I learned early on, to eliminate anyone who didn't post a photo of themselves. I figured that if they were serious, that they would take the time to... 1) take a recent photo, and 2) take the time to learn how to post that with their profile. (Although I also learned early on that when they posted photos, some tended to post photos from High School or Glamour Shots - which does not help to show what they currently look like.)
This dropped the number a bit more, usually down to a more manageable 20 to 30 choices.
Now, someone told me once that they had worked for one of these dating sites. They told me that many of the profiles posted are bogus, and meant to make it look like the dating site has more available applicants than they really have. I truly believe this, as I saw some pretty unbelievable profiles, and they were always there - looking. If these women were real, they wouldn't be around very long, as some eligible Superman would've swooped down and snatched them up in his muscular arms.
So, I am left with about 10 to 15 choices that may meet my criteria, and were real.
Of those, I would say that very few took the time to reply, or show interest (some of those may not have been real).
Of those that showed interest, I believe that I was able to set up meetings with about 5 or 6. Keep in mind that this did not happen in a weeks' time, but may have taken 2 or 3 weeks - or more - to work through.
Meeting a woman is not that difficult - IF - you keep it informal for the first meeting. I always chose a local coffee shop where we could sit and talk, and order a meal if we chose to. Nothing fancy, just well lit, and among other people. I wanted to be able to scream or run, if she turned psycho on me, and I wanted other people around to help hold her until the police got there - if necessary. Hey! some women can be scary!
I believe that it is possible to meet the right woman through internet dating, but I am not so sure that it will happen using 'free' dating sites. My wifes' sister used one of those. She finally met a man, and married him, but I'm not sure that he is the right one for her. She is massively overweight, and instead of encouraging her to lose the weight, he is insecure about IF she lost the weight, he feels that she would leave him (he is also overweight). So, they both waddle around, huffing and puffing, and not in the best of health. Some of the men that she met through this free dating site were worse, and bordered on the Norman Bates types.
I figure that if someone is serious about internet dating, they will be willing to pay for it (the internet dating site - not the sex - you goofs!).
Now, I must say that I broke one of my 'rules' about choosing who to reply to. My wife did not have a photo with her profile. I don't know why, but my one month was running out, so I decided to take a look at all possibilities - even those who had not posted a photo. I saw her profile, and sent her an e-mail. She replied. We started typing at first, and then I gave her my phone number and asked her to call - which I usually didn't do - so that we could talk. (I told her that if she didn't want her number to show up on my caller ID, she could use the *68 feature that blocked the number)
She phoned (didn't use the *68, either), and we talked. It turned out that we lived only 4 homes apart in the trailer park that I live in. We went for a walk one evening, and from there went out together. I think it turned out really well... we got married a bit over a year later, and are still together 6 years later.
I guess the bottom line is that you CAN find someone through internet dating, but you have to be patient, and willing to meet a lot of potential candidates before you meet 'the one'.
It also helps to have a positive attitude. Not only about the other person, but about yourself (I think I saw some negativity in your OP). If you always put yourself down, talk negatively about yourself, etc. this is not good. Being positive helps a lot! Of course... you don't want to go overboard, and be conceited, either.
Terry - another thought for you regarding your photo - it is a good photo... but could be a lot better! You're a handsome dude! Retake another photo. Do no use the mirror. Try to have a friend at work, or someone you know, take your photo for you. (Obviously, someone that you trust to not take your phone and run.) Before they snap the photo, think of a funny joke, or video that you saw that makes you laugh, or smile. The idea is to relax! Don't be serious, you aren't applying for Bethel, ya know. (<-- small joke) Your photo can be the 'bait' that gets you that first meeting with the woman of your dreams. Make it the best photo that you can.
Regards,
Jim TX
