Cyber-Bullies (page 7)

cyberjesus

It depends on what she looks like!

good point..... and it all depends whos watching. for some even that wont matter :-)

AllTimeJeff

Good thread. My opinions are as follows....

My job in part involves collecting online reviews of our business. It never ceases to amaze me how "brave" people get behind a keyboard. The reason is, there is no accountability.

For the purposes of this JW forum I think that many/most of us are developing, esp if we have just left. To a certain degree, I think some combativeness should be expected. Being willing to be wrong is a part of growing. I appreciate being able to test out different ideas here through the years. And since disagreeing wasn't allowed, I think part of the value of this forum is the ability to argue, regardless of how well one does at it.

I do thinks that there is a big difference between arguing, venting, and bullying. Bullying begins when the ability to argue a point successfully ends.

Obviously, bullying someone is very different, and I think that anytime anyone tries to prop up a weak argument by ridiculing your opponent should be given a very short leash.

cyberjesus

anyone tries to prop up a week argument by Ridiculing your opponent should be given a very short leash

how short? I think that if raise the level of intelligence of the forum then an argument with no back up evidence will be short lived. If we learn to question everything then even the worst of comments wont matter to us.

The ability not to believe but to challenge the belief.

Of course thats my opinion

Bungi Bill

What about those, though, who - despite everything - will persist in arguing against the obvious? (No names mentioned, of course!)

For people who go on insisting that black is somehow white, there are very few expressions left with which to describe them;

- other than "rather lacking in spare parts at the Brain Department"!

Bill.

Lady Lee

I'm really sad to see that so many people here have been the victims of bullying here or have witnessed it.

If you are the victim let me know.

If you see it say something

If you can't say something let me know.

If you are the bully then please hold in your anger before you hit the SUBMIT button. And if it slips out then apologize right away

Look no one is going to get banned for one time events. But we all have the power to stop bullying. Practise it here. Then take it out into your real lives.

Charilko

When set on the scales against supportiveness, help and sheer genrosity with information and more, in this forum those scales are very heavily weighted on the good and positive side

agreed but that doesn't mean we can't do better.

I feel sick when I remembver how I thought everyone who wasn't a JW like me was just nothing - well unless they were willing to becoem a JW. That kind of thinking stays with people a long time. If you aren't with me you are against me.

Cults spend a lot of time and energy pushing the us vs. them mentality. It is one more thing we need to get rid of.

cyberjesus

"I" think what we say about someone doesnt really tells you anything about that person but about ourselves

I totally agree with this but that doesn't mena it has no impact on the one being called names or bullied

my point is that even qualifying anything might be an attitude an action a comment or whatever its only our perception, our opinion not a black and white reality

But if your perception is skewed then you have a real problem in how you would communicate with people n'est pas? Somewhere along the line there needs to be a point where some things are not acceptible

Lady Lee

but cyberjesus

the only way to elevate the level of discussion is to make sure that people know to attack the ideas and no the posters. As long as some people think they can get away with bullying then too many discussions will devolve into name-calling and too many people will leave.

This is hopefully a safe place where people can learn how to communicate and debate ideas without getting stomped on

Lady Lee

For people who go on insisting that black is somehow white, there are very few expressions left with which to describe them

then why bother to continue? Name calling certainly isn't going to make them suddenly see the light.

And if you are that riled up then maybe you need to go walk the dog or something

If enough people drop out of the unwillable discussion that one person holding on is goign to be very lonely prettyh quick.

I would love to see an experiment for a week where anyone who gets into one of these unwinnable threads - that everyone just leaves. No more arguing. just no more posts If you feel you absolutely must post so the person knows you were there make it a blank one

What imapct would that have?

Sometimes there really is nothing left to say.

BTW I want to thank you all for jumping in to this discussion

saves me from one more night of zid trying to find 100 ways to kill me

talesin

Ah, we are blessed, indeed, to have our very own SHE-devil.

There's not a lot of bullying on the political threads, this election. ~ which is great ~ I *thought* that the name-calling was intense, and said something, and the parties involved chimed in and explained that it was all politics and they had respect for each other. It made me rethink my own perception of that particular aspect of the forum. A lightbulb moment for me.

If I felt bullied, or saw anything I felt need intervention, in the past, I have started a thread on the Technical Section, asking if a Mod could please PM me. Then, whoever is watching will reply, saying "you have a PM".

Just because none are posting, doesn't mean they aren't busy monitoring. :)

t

PS to LL, I opted for ~ ~ for emphasis. ;)

... and to all a good night.

still thinking

Lady Lee...with respect...all discussions on God or religion are unwinable. If we left them all JWN would look a bit like a ghost town. And as for leaving blank posts...imagine everyone doing that!!!

I do understand your frustration about some of the behaviour...But I also recognise the fact that some people that I considered a bit 'bullyish' when I first joined, have my utmost respect now. They challenged me, sometimes by the points they made, or just through frustration and anger, they made me dig deep and find out an question things I thought were solid ideas.

Generally on this forum people who are being perceived to be treated unjustly are also getting support from other posters. I have seen many threads where people have stepped up to support someone. I don't mean chosing a sides, I mean actually supporting them.

In the end, we all have a choice don't we...if we don't like something. We can always go to another topic of interest. We can choose not to continue posting on a thread we feel we are being personally attacked on. We can state how we feel and leave. No one makes us stay there. We are adults. And if we are being followed around and being harrassed, then we have the option of advising you or one of the other mods. And I'm sure there is no lack of that. In the end, no one is forcing anyone to continue a conversation or an argument. We all make that choice ourselves

Anyway, from some of the comments I have seen on here, more bullying seems to occur through PM's than in the public arena. I find that an uncomfortable thought. At least in public we can all see it and it doesn't live long. In private people can be truly horrible can't they? Thank goodness I haven't experienced that myself. But I feel sorry for those who have.

I have to say my pet hates are comments questioning someones mental state and sanity. But then, maybe some aren't bothered by that sort of comment...sometimes one mans insult is anothers inspiration.

Cyber-Bullies

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