If you don't believe in God where do you get the strength to cope?

by Miss.Fit 151 Replies latest jw friends

  • Miss.Fit
    Miss.Fit

    I know there are some here that are going through some tough times. Some of you do not believe in god. Some are not sure.

    I was told recently by a friend to pray to god for help and he would comfort me.

    My first impulse is to pray. But now I find myself hesitating.

    So where do you get your strength from to face your adversities?

    I feel adrift. I was very low. Ididn't know where to turn.

    Usually I would pray but now I am not sure anyone is listening or cares.

    I found my self visualising my death. How people would react . What my family would do. Would they even notice.

    Im so tired of living. I just want to curl in a ball and cease to exist. I even walked through the steps in my head.

    I figured life would go on without me. My familyis set. They dont need me. But I couldnt figure an easy way. I dont have sleeping pills. I dont think I could shoot myself. I thought about walking into the lake.

    But then I thought of my daughter who is starting college, she doesnt drive. Would she still go?

    So I went to her and asked her if something happened to me would you promise me you will still go to school?

  • cantleave
    cantleave

    From within yourself, your friends and other support networks.

  • nonjwspouse
    nonjwspouse

    (((miss.fit)))

    Apart from what you think you believe that your family is "set" without you, they are not. I hope your daughter let you know this. You are valuable just as every single one of us is valuable. Each day we find challanges and opportunities to chance someone life for the better, if even with an unexpected smile.

  • Miss.Fit
    Miss.Fit

    My daughter asked me if I was still visiting that depressing web site (I had read her a very sad post about a dfd son saying goodby to his parents. We were both in tears)

    And she promised to stayin schooI. So that was one relief. So I was . My sualising the steps I needed to take.

    Then my daughter comes to me and gives me a big hug and kiss and says I love you mom. Maybe you should visit some puppy websites. Nobody can look at puppies and still feel sad.

    I didn't look at puppies...I did start a search about suicide prevention a d found a free down load book.

    Thank you for having that on your site.

    I also spent yestdrday reaching out to my sisters and family.

    Im too tired to kill myself. I have too much to do to get ready.

    I think i need to teach my daughter to drive first. I have to clean out my locker at work. I have to clean

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW
    If you don't believe in God where do you get the strength to cope?

    KFC.. And.. Beer!!..

    ..........................  photo mutley-ani1.gif ...OUTLAW

  • Aunt Fancy
    Aunt Fancy

    Miss Fit, do NOT give up. I have been there before and your family needs you very much. Many of us have had those same feelings and I will tell you that going to a therapist helps a lot. I have a whole new outlook on life and I am living it and enjoying it. We faded a year ago and believe me when I tell you that it does get better. It is very difficult to go through but there are good times waiting for you.

    It is very common when you leave a cult to feel all alone but you have to get out there and make new friends. Find what you love to do and then get involved in something, art, charity work, sports whatever makes you happy.

    Also there are good books to read that will help you get your thoughts together. The Slight Edge is one and The Unthethered Soul is another. I don't find a need to talk to something I don't even know is there or cares about me. I talk to my husband when I need some encouragement or one of my family memeber and that is the beauty of having a therapist too.

    Please get some help and if you are feeling that low. The religion made me so low I felt just like you and I finally was able with professional help to see what it was doing to me.

    Your life will get better, you just have to take action.

    We are always here for you and hang in there, just remember your family loves you and so do we!!

    Aunt Fancy

  • Xanthippe
    Xanthippe

    Miss.Fit you are exhausted darling. You need to rest and rest. Please don't think of leaving your daughter on her own. My daughter is starting college at the end of this month too. It is what we have worked hard for isn't it? She needs you sooo much, don't leave her on her own. You need to rest, please don't harm yourself. Let us know if you are ok.

  • freeflyingfaerie
    freeflyingfaerie

    Missy~

    You are absolutely not alone. Those feelings you are experiencing bring a lot of us here. It is hard to see through the darkness sometimes...

    You are experiencing a great loss. Your belief system has collapsed and you are finding your way...which is what we are all doing..some are further along on that road than others..

    I understand your pain and dispair, you are not alone in wanting to end this aching pain. I did research for days on the easiest, quickest way to end it all, feeling totally calm about the idea...and came around to deciding to live with a new perspective. Your ideals about the religion have been crushed, but there is life beyond that world...

    Your daughter wants you and probably understands that you are fragile right now more than you realize. And you might even learn to love yourself in a new way...let that happen...give it time...grieve...read..experience things...

  • darth frosty
    darth frosty

    A few years back I had a sinus infection that got so bad fluid had backed up behind my left eye. After a day and half they were ready to do surgery. It was a trying day cause they said it would be late morning than afternoon, finally they took me down for surgery at 5:30 pm. Now mind you I had not eaten all day nor the night before.

    Once in the or prep I waited in there for another 2 hrs. I thought to myself while waiting 'now is the time someone with faith would pray.' But I am not a hypocrite nor would I pretend in a time of need to exercise faith in that which I dont believe.

    THAN I started to think...I thought abour how the SIth deal with pain and suffering. The Sith unlike the jedi do not use healing trances or techniques. The sith use pain and suffering to make them stronger in the force. A womb or blow to the Sith is turned around and used as a weopon.

    While mediatating on these things I felt a calm come over me. Yes, I shyt you not, thinking about my Sith persona and the ways that the sith use the force brought me more comfort than any prayer I ever made to Jehovah.

    Its not who or what you pray to its the strength of YOUR OWN THOUGHTS AND CONVICTIONS that drives it! Even tho I am an athiest I have a degree of PERSONAL spirituality with-in me. I reconize that salvation lies with-in and that I can choose the nature and form of that salvation.

  • Miss.Fit
    Miss.Fit

    Outlaw: when my daughter said puppies I thought of you. I was hoping for a cute puppy.

    I am doing good to drag myself out of bed to go to work. I really want to quit. But I am afraid if I dont have work to go to I will crawl in bed and never come out.

    I cuddled with my hubby and watched a movie. I had a nice converstion with my niece.

    I have been reading about how many of you cant be with your family. I realised I dont have that excuse. I know I need to make an effort. Listening to you guys I knew how my mom must feel. She is a jw but far away and I seldom call. We are not that close. She was so happy to hear from last week.

    I just dont have anything left to give.

    Thank you for your kind words.

    I hope I can get through work tomorrow.

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