A Silent Ram

by DakotaRed 57 Replies latest jw friends

  • ARoarer
    ARoarer

    ((((((((((((((Dakota))))))))))))))) I hope to meet you at the March on the 27th. You are very brave.

  • myself
    myself

    (((((( Dakota))))))

    Thank you for sharing your experience with us. The silent rams do need to be remembered too. Sometimes it seem so much easier to put in the back of our minds, but it still pushes forward and resurfaces no matter what.

    It is a pattern that isn't broken unless it is dealt with. My ex hubby's father was abused as a child, and he in turn abused his children and grandchildren. His excuse was because that was what happened to him. The shame of the situation caused my ex to hide this from me ( I learned about it when I was pregnant with my daughter from another family member). I was angry because I felt their feelings for him wanting to keep it a secret meant that it left a possibility that my daughter could have entered that pattern until it was found out.

    Dakota, thank you again. You are one of my favorite posters. You are so very supportive. You have dealt with the many cruelties that you have crossed in life and for that you are a great person who has passed that stregnth on. You Rock!!!

    Myself

  • larc
    larc

    Dakota,

    I am so sorry for what happened to you. I just can't understand how adults would abuse their children. It just does not compute for me. How sad, that adults would stoop so low.

  • Preston
    Preston

    I'm shocked Dakota, I had no idea.

    Shattering...

  • alamb
    alamb

    DR;

    I am so sorry for the pain you carried. By speaking now, your burden should lighten and we are here to help. E-mail me anytime.......bless you.

    for the children, young and adult,

    alamb

  • sisteract
    sisteract

    dakota red,

    what a heart wrenching experience to read!!! i am so sorry that you had to endure awful abuse at the hands of your mother!!!

    i will be at the march, and i will be there for you and all those who have suffered and still suffer.

    you mentioned you would not be here much longer in you post. where are you going? i have not been visiting this web site long, but i have always enjoyed and been enlightened by what you have to say here.

    thanks,

    sisteract

  • DakotaRed
    DakotaRed

    Thank you all. I cannot be at the March on the 27th, so thought I would speak out for all those who have suffered this.

    Outof and Sis, not to worry, I meant that I'm not going to be here much longer, meaning the board. It is painful at times to come here and read, so I am curtailing much of my posting and may possibly stop altogether in time. In actuality, I have too much good to live for, with two beautiful daughters and two wonderful grandsons.

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    (((Dakota))) in a friendly-supportive-not-abusive-way

    Men have such a hard time disclosing their history if abuse. All three of my brothers were abused. Not one will talk about it. But then neither will my sister.

    You have mentioned some very excellent points about how a young male percieves the abuse done to him. He is often told that since he responded it must of course meant he wanted/enjoyed it (BTW the same applies for females although it might be more of an issue for males - regardless of which gender they are abused by)

    It must have taken great strength to tell us now. And you are right many men vow to never hurt a child they way they were hurt. I am glad you are one of those men. Your courage here and support of so many others is truly appreciated.

    I hope you are taking good care of yourself tonight and being gentle with yourself. You deserve and need it. Please feel free to contact me if you need an ear

    You don't say if you got some professional help. I hope you have or will. There really are some good people out there.

    Some one mentioned Mike Lew's book but there are others too that might be helpful. A few books for men are listed on my web site. Most should be available in libraries or bookstores

    What the heck. Here is the list

    • Abused Boys: The Neglected Victims of Sexual Abuse by Mic Hunter
    • Against The Wall by Hardy & Hough
    • Broken Boys/Mending Men by Stephen D. Grubman-Black
    • Male Survivors: by Timothy Sanders
    • Victims No Longer by Mike Lew

    Please let us know you are OK. I think you have worried a few people.

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    I see you just posted - Thank you DR

  • RR
    RR

    "You da man" my prayers are with you!

    RR

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