A Silent Ram (page 6)

DakotaRed

COMF, since I already have such high respect for you, hearing your words really means a lot to me.

FreeFallin

((((((((((((Dakota Red)))))))))))))))))))

You're a very brave man. Peace be with you.

Free

outnfree

((((((Dakota)))))))

I read your story yesterday and felt I didn't have enough time then to write a proper reply. Now that I have the time, I find myself lacking the proper words....

I knew, of course, that women molested young men and boys and even that mothers molested their sons (and daughters). I also knew that oftentimes the abuser would tell the victim -- "You know you liked it." But I never really thought about how hard that statement would be for a young boy/man to hear because the physiological changes would be so obvious. I also never really thought about how those erections would make the molester feel what they were doing wasn't "so bad." Sick.

I am thankful for your courage and straightforwardness in reminding all of us that sexual molestation is practiced BY both sexes ON both sexes. I know it must have been difficult to reveal your personal past.

I will miss your posts and wish you the wonderful rejuvenation you seek.

out

abbagail

Hi Dakota: I told my "friend" about your story. When I told him your "code name" (DakotaRed), he laughed heartily and said that sounds like the name of some great weed. -- Of course he didn't 'fess up to anything re: abuse, but showed great interest and compassion in your experience.

I can't believe some idiot (obviously from this forum) emailed you privately to say you were an "attention hog" or that some things should "remain left unsaid." Gimme a big break! My response to THAT person is: (a) That is so cruel! It takes COURAGE to speak up. What are YOU afraid of? (b) It's a HEALING to speak up! and a big step forward! (c) There are hundreds of "attention hogs" on this forum if one wants to call us that. Isn't that what this forum is for, to share our lives, etc.? (d) I see LOTS of threads where people write to say "goodbye" when they choose to move on from this forum. So, like, whaaaas the big deal, man? [>:(]

I also stopped in to say THANKS to TorturedSoul for sharing that poem. It was a really good one! One of TS' lines in the poem mentioned a "second chance." That reminded me of a poem I wrote when I was still a JW for one of my (abused) non-JW brothers who died in '89 at age 35. I entitled it: "Robbie's Second Chance." Maybe I'll post it sometime...

Also, DR, THANKS again for those website links for victims of male sexual abuse. I wrote to Dr. Mic Hunter re: his 2003 Poster project for the Int'l Conference on Male Abuse & Victimization, which I read about on one of those websites. And HE actually WROTE ME BACK!!! Dr. Hunter said he would include the photo of my deceased brother, Robbie, in the Poster if I would like! I'm so excited! How about that???

Hope you're having a great day, Dakota, and here's another {{{{{hug}}}}} to keep ya going strong!

GRITS

Sabine

Hi Dakota,

I am so sorry to read your story, but am very grateful you have the tremendous courage and compassion to share it with us. It was such a pleasure to meet you in person and see the pics of your beautiful daughters and grandbabys. You do have a lot to live for!! I only suffered neglect and emotional abuse by my mother, but it's very hard for me to say I don't hate her...I greatly admire your attitude. Take care (((((sweetheart))))).

TheStar

Dakota,

I've always admired you for being a true gentleman. Words can not describe my feelings after reading your post. My heart goes out to you, I'm ever so proud to know a courageous survivor like yourself.

DakotaRed

As difficult as it was for me to post that and expecting some negative responses, I am truly humbled by all your outpouring. We are all truly a family and the support you all show to everyone is just unbelievable.

Sabine, meeting you and Mak at Princess's was indeed an honor. You two are a fantastic couple.

Out, thank you for pointing out that pedophiles do indeed try to convince children that it was enjoyable. I read one account recently where a mother had molested her son, like mine did me, and convinced him that he had raped her. In therapy, he kept repeating how bad he felt that he had raped his own Mom, starting at age 10! How does a 10 year old possess the strength or power to rape a grown woman?

Grits, tell your friend it was Cambodian Red he must be thinking about. I won't say any more, LOL. If you don't post your poem, please email it to me. I would love to read it.

Star, thank you very much. After receiving condemnation for so many years, I can't tell you how happy I am to receive all your kind words.

(((((((((((((((Everyone on JWD)))))))))))))))))))

Edited by - DakotaRed on 19 September 2002 20:18:15

Perry

Thank you very much for bringing a very personal story to our attention. I too have a family relative who is female that seems to have molested at least two generations of male younger relatives. The whole thing was hushed up and hasn't been mentioned for years. All involved were witnesses. I was never privy to details but evidently it ;was never reported to elders much less authorities. This was decades ago and everyone is grown now.</P>
Perversion is definitely not gender specific.

Thanks again for your courage to speak out.

A Silent Ram

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