by StinkyPantz 69 Replies latest jw friends
It depends on exactly what needs to be forgiven and forgotten (I don't think all things should be)
However, as a general rule I'd say that not forgiving and forgetting only hurts ourselves - it doesn't really harm the 3rd party at all.
Best to move on, it's been shown to affect health and mind.
LT-
Maybe it's just choice of words, but the phrase "feeding off my anger" sounds positively self-damaging, to me.
Maybe it is my choice of words. Maybe what I am doing is something else. Or maybe I am self-damaging. I don't really know. Time will tell I suppose.
I don't forgive, ever. Whats the point, who feels better? What I do is try to understand why the wrong was done. From that I can accept the hurt that was caused. I then make a decision about the relationship.
I always said that I don't have the capacity to love, therefore I can't hate. I just understand.
Once I understand, then forgetting is easy.
When forgiving and forgetting comes into it, then the relationship is already changed. You have now started a new relationship.
Steve
Smack-
I always said that I don't have the capacity to love, therefore I can't hate. I just understand.
That's a rather odd sentiment. Maybe I'm misunderstanding. Surely you love and forgive your children's transgressions, if no one else's?
I think if you change "feeding off my anger" to "letting my anger motivate me to do good" it will more accurately reflect what you feel.
Just a thought
Happyout
>>>> ...there is no such thing as forgiving and forgetting, at least not at the level we're talking about. What there is, is survival and peace. Big Tex
Great post, BT.
Did anyone ever tell you that you needed to write a book? Well, if not... you need to write a book.
Stinky, my kids are perfect, whats to forgive ;)
I have no problem forgiving someone once or twice (depending on the issue and the person) but
Happyout-
"letting my anger motivate me to do good"
As usual, you more accuately convey what I am trying to say than even me. From now on, I'm going to send you my posts and let you proofread them and change them around before I post them. People might actually understand me for once.
PEOPLE DIE, BUT THINGS DON'T.
