The Elders Are Getting Opinions About Minimus (page 4)

Nosferatu

It's amazing how JWs will starve for knowledge of what has happened to one of their members who quits attending. My mother went through the same crap with me. But when I was attending the meetings, nobody paid attention to me.

undercover

....within the last month, 2 other elders questioned her about my family and she told them that if they wanted to visit HER and give her a shepherding call to ENCOURAGE her that would be appreciated but if they wanted to quizz her about me, they should stay home.....And you wonder where I get it.

You may yet help your mother escape the WTS. If the elders keep bugging her and harrassing her, she might just open up to listen to why you made your exit. Once the doubts creep in, she'll be more open to accepting information from sources outside her Watchtower magazine.

willyloman

A thought that hasn't surfaced here yet on this topic:

Sometimes, the elders don't approach a person who has just stopped coming because they already "know" why they aren't there and just don't want to give voice to it.

We had a Min Svt who left a message on an elder's answering machine that he couldn't do an assigned talk coming up that week, and that since this was the third talk in a row he had cancelled, he wanted to be deleted as an MS. He never came to another meeting and never met with the elders. He did have a long phone convo with one of the elders in which he said he was "having some doubts about how strong his faith really was" and needed "time to work some things out." That's been two or three years and no one's seen him since! (And, no, he was not DF'd).

However, before he left, both in personal conversation and even in some talks from the platform he was known for voicing some slightly unorthodox ideas about Christianity (at least from a JW point of view). He never said anything "actionable" but it was clear he was conflicted and searching for meaning.

I saw him in a coffee shop, reading Michener's "The Source," about six months after he disappeared. Another elder was with me. We walked over and said hello. He didn't invite us to sit, but chatted briefly and said that things were going okay for him and that he was doing a lot of reading these days. Then he fell silent, and neither of us knew what to say, except, well, we miss you, hope to see you soon. We left. In the car, we discussed briefly what else we could have done. The other elder, much older than I, said, Well, you can't force people to love Jehovah.

Though it went unspoken, we both knew he left because he didn't believe it anymore, or just got tired of it. There was nothing more to be said, and nothing to be gained by opening that can of worms ourselves.

I have often thought about this brother as I make my own journey to freedom. A day will come when I will have coffee with him and find out what he's been reading.

integ

My opinion is, I've said it before, I'll say it again...What a bunch of dicks.

starfish422

I couldn't agree more with what seattleniceguy said.

I think it's deplorable that this sort of thing would come up at the book study of all places!! Aren't the elders supposed to discourage speculation about why members may have left?? And this dickhead is ~~using~~ abusing his authority as bookstudy conductor to *encourage open speculation* about that very subject, in a public forum? In front of your mom, to whom the elders should be giving support (their own brand of 'support', anyways)?

Not only are they encouraging speculation, I agree with whomever said that they are trying to instill fear in the masses to "examine their own spirituality" so that they, too, are not overcome by whatever it was that led astray poor Brother Minimus and his family.

ACK. The whole situation is unconscionable.

undercover

Sometimes, the elders don't approach a person who has just stopped coming because they already "know" why they aren't there and just don't want to give voice to it........

.....Though it went unspoken, we both knew he left because he didn't believe it anymore, or just got tired of it. There was nothing more to be said, and nothing to be gained by opening that can of worms ourselves.

Now, if all elders treated everyone that wanted to leave quietly that way, there would be a lot less problems, for them and the one leaving. But since the WTS is intent on punishing "apostates" you can't always simply walk away.

You're elder friend said, "You can't force people to love Jehovah". While that's a simplistic, blind faith statement, it's partially true. You can't force people to adhere to a belief system if they no longer believe it or discover problems with it. Why force the issue? Why be intent on forcing people to choose between an organization or their family? If they no longer believe and wish to withdraw from the activities associated with the religion, why hunt them down and create a situation that no one will win in?

Country Girl

Sounds to me like Minimus is being set up. They throw these theories out there, making people question and doubt. Coupled with Minimus' non-compliance with various investigative techniques, they are trying to throw up a smoke screen, from behind which they will do their utmost to ruin his reputation and make *sure* that all in the congregation will not question the decision to throw him out, based on their half-assed assumptions, even though he hasn't given them any reason to throw him out.

The congregation will swallow this good lump of shit with a big smile and say "Well, he must have done SOMETHING to make this happen." Not really knowing, but being informed, albeit in a hypothetical sense, they will KNOW that it was coming and will be prepared so that there are no objections because after all, the book study conductor said "What would you think IF... so and so...." and they all discussed it and came up with the conclusion it must be SOMETHING thta was a disfellowshippable offense, since NO ONE leaves Jehovah just because they don't believe any more." It's incomprehensible to them that anyone does not believe anymore. They need more to bite on. So this book study conductor is throwing it out there, to make them doubt and think about Minimus and hs family, which is a bad sign, in my books.

CG

Double Edge

I think the conductor , I mean overseer, was fishing, hoping my mother would bite.

Gees... what a way to live. Never being a dub, I'm always amazed when I read something like this. Church is supposed to be an uplifting and positive experience, not one where your forced to go with the Gestapo looking over you. By the way, his list of reasons were very nearsighted.... how about the normal reasons people don't attend:

Boring meetings, boring people, boring doctrine, other business to attend to, going out for a ride in nature to truly be close to God, tired, stressed out, etc, etc.

minimus

The elders think I let materialism get the best of me. They think I'd rather make money in this transient system of things than stay the course. They are bewildered. A couple of them have this gnawing at them. They are the self-righteous ones. I still have an older elder friend come by my work and still tell me the latest elder gossip. Obviously, he's not threatened. If the PO was told by the body a month ago to approach me and yet he still hasn't, thatshould say a little something. I think it makes them look bad when people publiclly ask, "what happened to them?" Now, since they can only suppose, I think they'll try fishing. Perhaps, one day, if my mother is having a bad day, she might express some things she knows. And yes, she knows exactly how I feel but wants to believe that I may "return to Jehovah."

Sunnygal41

This is just me........but, I have never had the patience or nerves to let things drag on......I went to the hall when cordially invited because I wanted closure and quickly........don't waste my time and I won't waste yours. However, now, I would have just told them on the phone to get it over with, I had no interest in staying in anymore, I was too busy trying to start a new life.

Terri, of the cut and dried class

The Elders Are Getting Opinions About Minimus

Share this