You will not be allowed to enjoy oral sex (a peck on the end of the pecker may be ok - its up to your conscience), but if you do, you will not be able to publicly talk about it - snort.
boa
Posts by boa
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12Join the Great Crowd today!
by UnDisfellowshipped income one, come all -- come join "the great crowd of other sheep" today!.
look at all the "benefits" you will receive (taken directly from watchtower publications):.
* you will not have jesus christ as your mediator between you and god.. * you will have the "faithful and discreet slave" as your only mediator between you and jesus and god.. * you will not be born again.. * you will not be in the kingdom of god.. * you will not be baptized by the holy spirit.. * you will not be anointed by the holy spirit.. * you will not have the holy spirit abide in you.. * you will not be one of the saints or holy ones.. * you will not be adopted as "sons of god" until you pass the final test at the end of the 1,000 year millennial reign of the 144,001, and then, if you pass that test, you can still be destroyed if you rebel against the 144,001, even though the "anointed ones" are given immortal life immediately upon death, and they never have to pass any future tests.. * you will never be immortal -- you can always be destroyed by god in the future for "apostasy".. * you will not be viewed as being perfect in god's eyes until after the final test at the end of the 1,000 years, even though the anointed ones are viewed as being perfect at their baptism.. can anyone else add any additional "benefits" to this list?
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24
i'm really getting mad
by dustyb inok, these damn elders have pushed it.
they've told my g/f that i don't believe in god and hate and despise him.
they've told her that by disobeying the elders advice, she is disobeying jehovah.
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boa
dustyb, damn nicer avatar, looking at that ugly mug you used to use was icky! imho!
boa prefers sitting in a tree with a Remington 7mm mag looking for that big muley....hours of quiet introspection with (possibly) a few minutes of absolute heart stammering excitement.
boa
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9
I've discovered something..........
by desib77 inabout myself...... i think i'm a very judgemental person and that really bothers me.
it's only in regard to religon though..... for example, yesterday, after my husband and i had watched the passion, i was all pumped up about religon, so thankful that jesus had died for me and and ready to start trying to better myself.
that evening my husband got really ticked off at someone who had pulled out in front of us almost causing an accident and cussed them out.
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boa
yes i've been a judgmental sob for most of my life. I was a good student at the jw school of how to not be a true christian. I am only thankful that my REAL person inside eventually broke out and now the judgmental pendulum has swung way the OTHER way which isn't necessarily so hot either but it is where I feel safest.
I was a real arrogant self-righteous bastard at times in the past and finding the troof about such sad behaviour came slowly and still rears its ugly head once in a while, triggering shortly thereafter an anti-reaction so as to come back to reality.
boa....will always be an sob in one way or another....
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10
Ozzie's Weekend Poll #90
by ozziepost inwhat a week it's been!
here on jwd deep and meaningful threads have proliferated, the age-old trinity debate continues to be played out, and heart-rending experiences have been told.. how's it been for you?.
mrs ozzie and i have been kept busy, mrs ozzie had a small operation and it's a case of 'so far, so good'.
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boa
1. Open it first
Yes, absolutely - curiosity is one of my better tendencies.
3. Drop it in the bin marked "Apostate Literature"
Since I don't believe this bs fallacy of jws, I don't have such a bin. I DO have a 'TRUTH about the 'truth' bin though - snick.
4. Take it to the elders.
Jeece, nope, sheesh.
5. Ignore it
See 1 above.
6. Tear it into tiny pieces
Depends - if it was absolute horse-shyte, maybe, but I doubt it. Gradual revelation about da troof has led me on a less tramautic exit from the org, depends on the mood.
7. Put it in the shredder
Don't have one, and besides that sounds like too good an end to probably what would be a good laugh.
8. Frame it!
Unlikely, but I do have a binder with all the funny jokes, picture riddles, sayings etc I've collected over the years, so that would seem an appropriate place to put it. Of coure only an appropriate 'postate audience would get it, but what a red-faced, rib-hurting, tear-jerkin' laugh we could have over it!
9. Send it back marked "Return to Sender"
Jeece no, not unless I could somehow hide a copy of Crisis of Consience in the envelope.
10. Put it with all the other letters on a nail in the loo.
Heh heh, sort of a wts crucifixion?
11. Read it thoroughly and compose a thoughtful reply.
I would consider doing this if some anonymity would be possible, since I'm not ready to be df'd da'd (yet). I have too much work to do to 'preaching' to the converted (my family and a few close jw friends)lol
12. Other (please detail)
I've received many letters from the society over the years as a pioneer dub, bethelite etc, and believe I still have all of them. I only thought about them now because of your post - they are all in a file folder somewhere getting brittle. But maybe I'll dig them up and share some of the more interesting (entertaining) contents of them someday.
boa....very finely shredded paper makes great wipe material, kinda tickly though I bet.
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5
My Aposta-goad of the Day
by SixofNine ini went to breakfast this morning with my daughter and my sister.
my daughter had just been studying mexico in her geography section, and my sister who has traveled some in mexico was giving us some mexico factoids.
speaking of the geography around mexico city, she said that the mountains surrounding the city hold pollution in the basin (city) area to such an extent that living there is the equivelant of smoking two packs of cigarettes per day.. "so, can people be disfellowshipped for living in mexico city?
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boa
cute little goad
in studying about environmental pollution being the driving force behind automotive emissions design, a stat came up that said in the Los Angeles basin, that of all the different percentages of different pollution, 1% was cigarette smoke!
sheesh...
boa
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boa
nice feet ChimChim
Now, if you could maybe post some pics of.....
I'm already into skirts, shorts
Cuz, i'm into skirts and short shorts myself
Jeece, the second toe being longer than the big toe esplains alot - now I know my problem!
boa....the snake has arrived....
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32
I'm I the only one here that..................
by reganashe injust hate religion all together.
i don't want to have anything to with it, it makes my skin crawl.
i don't want my daughter to be exposed to relgion in any form.
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boa
Nope, i don't think you're the only one to feel that way. Leaving jws can be a tramautic event or period of life that leaves a real bitter taste in the mouth. On the other hand, I believe that there should be a point where reflection of such an event after some of the initial shock and pain wear off will lead a person to look at the subject of spirituality objectively and again consider one's 'spiritual' needs if that's still a valid concern to a person.
For me, I'm in a similar stage as you. However, even when I was trying to get me head around 'figuring' out the problems I was having in da troof, I knew I would likely never join another organized religion - they are repellent to me. Not the people inside necessarily, just the subjection/control factor.
My next foray will likely be into the history and source of religions and the bible - where it goes from there, I don't know - sheesh. Life is so good right now for my immediate family that I'm going to enjoy that for a while me thinks.
boa's .02
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51
Be afraid... be very afraid...
by LittleToe ini really must be on here too much - 4000 posts and counting.. supreme one seemed so far away, not that long ago.. now it's a mere 1000 posts away - a drop in a bucket, six months at most, surely.... it seems so long ago, that i protested giving up my light-saber in preference of the fullness of "the force" imbued by the "emperor class".. and now another impending transformation.... to which i say.... .. .. .. .. .. .. ..
argggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!.
.. (monty python quote of the day - but which movie?
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boa
congrats LT!
I believe at 100 it is 'junior member' (as in, look at boa's junior member)
then at 250, i get to become a 'master member' (my my how boa has really 'grown up' look at his master member)
boa....one more closer to 250 - thanx lt
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15
Are you free?
by MicStroz ingalatians 5:1 for such freedom christ set us free.
stand fast, and do not let yourselves be confined again in a .
yoke of slavery.
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boa
yes, freeeeeeeeeeedom (say it like mel gibson in braveheart at the end)j
welcome pratt1! to JWD!
Freedom to believe and think what you want is the most precious freedom imho. The wts has fought for this freedom at great length in countries around the world, and then once it is secured, has ensured their own members no longer have that freedom. More importantly, they take away the most important freedom of conscience by the hundreds of written and more subtle unwritten rules - Jeece!
boa....who will jealously guard his freedom from now on....
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73
Farting at the Kingdom Hall.
by avishai inonce, when i was nine, i farted so loud, from the back row, that the guy giving the prayer started laughing and had to try really hard not to totally lose it.. any other stories?
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boa
The trick is in delivery with the SBD.
You realize you're having a slow but gradual pressure buildup like filling a tire. The tire in this case is also called a spare tire, the air is yer fart vapours. You can't escape to relieve the pressure. The problem is that if you wait too long or the gas builds up too fast, you'll have some embarrasing stomach noise that sounds like a fart but isn't the real thing! Anyway, the trick is to plant one cheek firmly on the seat as a sort of anchor (I usually choose my right one for this since i'm right handed, I must also be right-cheeked)
Now, the next skill is to ever so gently lift the other non-anchored cheek and pry it away from the anchored one thus causing a sort of controlled release of immense pressure and stink. Execute this perfectly and you will get away with da bomb and no one will know it was you - just look around like you're looking for the perpetrator like everyone else.
Screw it up and what you just attempted will sound like letting a big balloon go slowly by squeezing the top between two fingers - squuuuuuueeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!
boa
i'm doing one now ....