Posts by Cicatrix

74

So, will you be voting for Bush next time?

by czarofmischief in

.

when the election rolls around, will you be pulling the lever for w?

i will, unless somebody comes along with the offer of free supermodels for me.. czar

Cicatrix

Nonwithstanding issues brought up regarding disrespect for the environment, a shitty economy, implementation of "faith-based" initiatives despite the clear and concise speech in the Constitution outlining seperation of church and state, allowing his personal belief in Jeezus Khrist to guide him when making decisions banning potentially radical research such as stem-cells, and a war waged under false pretenses with bad intelligence presented as fact to incite support for a war where WMD are not found and US troops are killed...

Here, here, Reborn. I second you on that. And my family is staunch Republican. But one of my relatives is in military intelligence...

I registered to vote just to vote Bush OUT.

My vote may not count, but it sure will make me feel better:)

13

Today's policy on being DF'ed

by PointBlank in

jw
friends

would someone be so kind as to catch me up on the current disfellowship policy?

how exactly are the rank and file being instructed to treat family members who are df'ed?

i know it changes with the wind.

Cicatrix

Interestingly, the current hard line stance seems to be applied to unbaptised persons as well. When I vountarily left last year, giving no reason for doing so, my mother was told by an elder that she would "Never" be baptised if she associated with me.

5

My Sister With Four Kids Is Losing Her Home-Any Advice??

by Cicatrix in

i'm just kind of throwing this out there, because i'm at wits end.. my sister is about to be put on the street because she can't make her house payments.

the poor woman works like a dog, goes to college full time (the college has no student housing), and takes care of four kids on her own.

the kid's father (whom she divorced for cheating and saddling her with all his debts) moved to the other side of the country, supposedly to obtain work and send her back some money .

Cicatrix

Thanks, Cassiline,

She was able to obtain medicaid when she got pregnant with the twins. A sympathetic caseworker helped her obtain a court ruling that staid the state from kicking her off medicaid, due to her dire need for her medication, but that's all the aid she's been allowed besides her $ for school.

At least she has that.

I'll keep working on the rest.

Thanks for your suggestions

Cicatrix

22

Let the shunning begin!

by Cicatrix in

boy, this has just been my lucky week.

twice in one week i was the recipient of "active shunning" by former congregation members.. scene one-the local discount food place where all the blue collar folks (and a few smart upper crust ones) buy their food.

i'm busy grocery shopping and sister zealous comes marching down the other side of the aisle, dutifully studying the cans on said shelf.

Cicatrix

{{{{Rebel}}}} I can't even imagine what it is like to face what you face each day. My thoughts are with you.

Onacrus-You betcha:) Rebelrouser to the core now!

Fokus-Welcome. The last time I stepped foot in a Kingdom Hall was the Memorial of 2002. Like you, I had a panic attack. A REALLY bad one. I decided I'd rather be dead than live an eternity with people who made me feel like that. Then I heard about Silentlambs from a friend who attended my congregation, and that was it for me! I wouldn't bear the name of an organisation that refuses to protect its most innocent members! All of the rest of the deprogramming came as a result of the folks on this board. Thanks all:)

Yesterday's Child-Bully for your Mom!

Rocketman- I went out and bought two more blue dresses this week. It's my new favorite color-hehe.

5

My Sister With Four Kids Is Losing Her Home-Any Advice??

by Cicatrix in

i'm just kind of throwing this out there, because i'm at wits end.. my sister is about to be put on the street because she can't make her house payments.

the poor woman works like a dog, goes to college full time (the college has no student housing), and takes care of four kids on her own.

the kid's father (whom she divorced for cheating and saddling her with all his debts) moved to the other side of the country, supposedly to obtain work and send her back some money .

Cicatrix

Hi All,

I'm just kind of throwing this out there, because I'm at wits end.

My sister is about to be put on the street because she can't make her house payments. The poor woman works like a dog, goes to college full time (the college has no student housing), and takes care of four kids on her own. The kid's father (whom she divorced for cheating and saddling her with all his debts) moved to the other side of the country, supposedly to obtain work and send her back some money . He says he is working, but has not sent her a single penny.

Oh, did I mention she has a chronic disease that requires medication just to keep her alive? Or that she has to have surgery right now, too?

I've told her she and the children can come stay with us until she can figure out what to do. I have no savings to help her, though. I had some money coming in from another relative who was graciously helping me with my schooling, and I already arranged to have that sent to her awhile back, but it is only a pittance, compared to what she owes.

Social Services won't help, because they say she is too far in debt. When she asked for help early on, they told her she wasn't in dire enough straits then, and to come back when things got worse!!!!

As if that weren't bad enough, she can't get a rent controlled apartment, because she has one child too many to qualify for the units that are available (and for those of you who are thinking she shouldn't have had so many kids-she was told that the medication she was on had rendered her sterile, that she would not become pregnant while she was on the meds and she probably would be infertile for the rest of her life. Then she got pregnant with TWINS while on the meds and had to endure a high risk pregnancy!! ).

This woman is not your stereotypical welfare mom (and I'm not just saying that cause she's my sis). She works as full time as the economy will let her, is eligible for Phi Theta Kappa at college, but can't afford the freaking dues. Plus, she's dealt nearly her whole life with her illness with more grace than I've ever seen anyone have!! She puts my whiny little self to shame, and I'm angry because I can't help her any more than keeping a temporary roof over her head!!!

Any suggestions would be appreciated.

Thanks,

Cicatrix

21

Who's responsibility is it to tell other JW's you're disfellowshipped?

by what-now? in

jw
friends

Cicatrix

Please don't be offended by my stating that I was not DA'd for any sin per se (although there was one elder in particular who was working hard to find a sin-hehe. He is the same one that went directly to my mother's house after our final meeting and told her that if she continued to talk to me, she would NEVER be baptised-surprise, surprise). I was making no judgement against you. I was trying to point out the fact that I am being shunned simply because I left the organisation, and for no other reason.

I personally think that whatever you do is your business and no one elses.

You hit the nail on the head when you said you shouldn't have to confess over and over again. I was expected to confess to a sin I never comitted, based on the unfounded rumors of an unbelieving relative, who, it turns out, is simply pissed off because they wanted to buy the house that we bought!!!! And yes, elders can use information from "unbelievers" against you, according to the sheperding book.

Regards,

Cicatrix

21

Who's responsibility is it to tell other JW's you're disfellowshipped?

by what-now? in

jw
friends

Cicatrix

Welcome What-Now,

I understand the concern you feel about raising your children to be spiritual persons. That's what kept me unhappily in the Jehovah's Witness organization for years after I knew that everything was not what it was supposed to be in the "spiritual paradise." Ultimately, a couple of my children quit attending meetings before I did. They told me they just couldn't live the Witness brand of spirituality. I later learned that one of my children was so unhappy because of the religion, they considered suicide!!

Please stop and think for a minute. The Witnesses say over and over that it is manifest that they are the "only true religion" because "by their fruits you will know them." Okay, think of how you've been treated when you've made an effort to go back. Does this apply to you? Read again the experiences of others on this board. Does this apply to them? Look up the characterisitcs of high control religions on the net. Do any apply to the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society?

And ask yourself-Am I truly, truly going to be able to live this life?

There is a huge difference between following the tenants of a religion and being spiritual. Not one single person on this earth has the right to tell you that God has given up on you just because you don't choose to worship their way!!

I highly recommend the book "The New Revelation" (although I can't remember who the author is).

As regards to your kids, have you spoken to them about how they really feel? When I did, I was quite surprised.

Since we left, we are much closer as a family. My kids have not abandoned their values. It doesn't take five meetings a week for me to get through to them what decency is all about. They are happier and more cooperative. Life is good again:)

As far as whether you should let Witnesses know you are disfellowshipped or not, well, that's got to be your call. If you really want to get reinstated, you are expected to follow the Watchtower Society's rules. It's a requirement of membership. If you are caught by an "inquiring" JW, there will no doubt be consequences for you.

I personally have left for good on my own terms. I am labeled by them "an apostate", simply because I chose not to practice their religion anymore, not for any sin mentioned in the Bible. I left with the full knowlege that I would be shunned by most. I believe in freedom of religion. If a Jehovah's Witness chooses to shun me by not talking to me and/or looking the other way when they see me in public, so be it. But, if they attempt to play mind control games by making a display of ignoring me and engaging my children in conversation (there were always reasons why they couldn't be baptised while we were attending), I will speak to them. By initiating contact and then making a show of shunning me, they have broken the rules. They have established a contact. Therefore, I exercise my right to acknowledge their presence. If they choose to run off when I speak to them, that is their right, but I WILL explain to any bystanders EXACTLY what is going on.

Best wishes for whatever you decide

Cicatrix

76

What 5 songs MOST remind you of your time as a teen..?

by ScoobySnax in

jw
friends

ok, being the 80's teen i was.....here goes.... 5. milli vanilli.

girl you know its true (g g g girl!!).

4. wham young guns (go for it!).

Cicatrix

1. "I, I, have become, comfortably numb" Pink Floyd The Wall was my absolute favorite album!! I still love it.

2. "I Feel Like Making Love" by Bad Company, and also one of theirs that began with

"Morning sun comes through my window

All night long I have been waiting"

Does ANYONE know the name of this song? I have been trying to remember it for years!

3. "Hot Blooded" and "Dirty White Boy" by Foreigner

4. "Who's Crying Now" by Journey

5. "Time For Me to Fly" by Reo Speedwagon. The first time I saw my first Major high school boyfriend, he was singing this song at the local fair. I should've taken it as a warning-hehe.

Ahhh, I was such a wild little hellion. Then I got "saved" so I could Live Forever On a Paradise Earth tm.

teenyuck-I was sooo in love with Leif Garret, lol. Did you ever see "Peter Lundy and the Medicine Hat Stallion?"

But then there was that guy in "The Blue Lagoon", Greg Evigan (BJ from BJ and the Bear), John Schnieder (Bo Duke-Dukes of Hazard and the General Lee-the Charger was my dream car, lol)

20

Farting Can Kill You!

by m0nk3y in

.

i thought i would share with you guys a little animation i did today .. i quite like it *giggles* .

www.geocities.com/gaymonkey2002/monk3y.html.

Cicatrix

I was in the bookstore the other day drooling over the new books the employee just stuck on the shelf, when this little old lady ambles by checking out the shelves behind me. Suddenly, she lets a great big juicy one that echoed through the whole back of the store,then took off around the corner.My sons would've been proud of her.My dog, too-she is the Queen of Fart, hehe.

I thought of them when I looked at your animation.

Good job, by the way:)

22

Let the shunning begin!

by Cicatrix in

boy, this has just been my lucky week.

twice in one week i was the recipient of "active shunning" by former congregation members.. scene one-the local discount food place where all the blue collar folks (and a few smart upper crust ones) buy their food.

i'm busy grocery shopping and sister zealous comes marching down the other side of the aisle, dutifully studying the cans on said shelf.

Cicatrix

Thanks all, for enjoying my humorous moments along with me:)

Goshawk-I love the T shirt idea:) I was going to make a T with a large red A on the front of it as a gag.The Aeropostale clothing cracks me up, cause it reminds me of the word Apostate for some reason.I thought about dressing up as an Apostate for next Halloween-hehe-I could wear a shirt with a big red A and carry a copy of "Crisis of Conscience" a couple of my college texts, and a college diploma.

Rayzorblade-I believe in freedom of religion, even if I currently practice freedom from religion:) I made the choice to leave the organisation, JWs have made the choice to stay. I won't bug individuals if they don't bug me, but I will NOT put up with head games! My daughter was extremely shocked by Sandy's behavior. At one point, I was one of only a few women who was friends with Sandy.I stood by her when her prominent family members shunned her when she chose to divorce her husband (who was later convicted of child sexual abuse and is still supported by his good JW family who thinks he was framed, despite the evidence to the contrary).

I knew that I would be shunned when I left (and I warned my kids that most likely,even our closest JW friends would shun me), but it didn't matter to me. I was surprised that many JWs are not content with just walking by and ignoring a former member-they make a concerted effort to let the person know that they saw them, then proceed to ignore them after that. Now if that ain't manipulative behavior, I don't know what is! It didn't serve to "shame" me in any way, though. It just made my daughter extremely angry.And gave me a good laugh.

When my daughter told my son about it, he told me he wishes that he was dissassociated too, so the JWs wouldn't talk to him:) Alas, the elders never considered letting any of my children be baptised, because we could only get out in service seven hours a month instead of ten.That was the only reason the kids and I were ever given when they were turned down repeatedly for baptism.

Amen Neyank! Could you imagine the collective sigh of relief from many of the rank and file if the GB annulled the shunning doctrine? I personally was never any good at it. I would at least SMILE sympathetically when I ran into a former member, and I would never seek them out to punish them.I know I sure didn't feel like I was following in Jesus' footsteps when I did it. But being as that is a major component of cultic control, I doubt they'll drop that "Theocratic" tactic.

Lisagas420- LOL at the bumper sticker idea;)I want one of each to put on my car:) How about a book- "The Idiots Guide to Shunning and Being Shunned."

But your point about the impact on depressed or mentally ill people is one thing that just sticks in my craw. As far as I'm concerned, when shunning behavior results in a person becoming so distraught they commit suicide, the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society and the individual members who are involved in the shunning are bloodguilty!

{{{Freeing89}}}}} One thing that really irks me is when persons who were born to JW parents are shunned. They had no choice as to whether or not they were raised in that cult, yet they face losing their entire social structure if they can no longer stomach the manipulation from the "loving" organisation.

When I announced my decision to leave to the elders, they went straight to my mother's house after talking to me. They told her that if she associated with me, she would never be baptised.No one could convince me now that shunning is a loving practice, or that the Watchtower Bible and Tract society do not try to bully their members, or that they are not responsible for the break-up of families!

Maybe you need to let the townspeople know that your sister doesn't actually talk to you, and explain why. I've begun educating members of my community about it. I'm an amatuer journalist and I've already been published. I'm really liking Mark Twain's quote about not messing with a man who buys ink by the barrel:)I have an editor who loves conflicting issues like this, too.The attributes of cults and high control relgions are going to be featured my college's paper this fall:)

Because of an issue that occurred in our community regarding two JWs, a rule was added to my sons' school handbook that NO shunning of any individual would be tolerated on school property, so my community is taking this issue to heart.

Regards,

Cicatrix