gotta love that term: cutesy-pootsy!
-LisaBObeesa
lisaBObeesa
JoinedPosts by lisaBObeesa
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31
JW Dad talks to me,talks to me not
by mommy1 inmy jw dad calls me every once in awhile and is very friendly.
i have even went to his house for dinner,went shopping with him and his wife.
then months go by and i call he is cold and distant.so i figure he doesn't want a relationship.
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31
JW Dad talks to me,talks to me not
by mommy1 inmy jw dad calls me every once in awhile and is very friendly.
i have even went to his house for dinner,went shopping with him and his wife.
then months go by and i call he is cold and distant.so i figure he doesn't want a relationship.
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lisaBObeesa
SpiderMonkey, you said,
******* My sister, over the next couple of years, sent me those cutesy-pootsy cards announcing the births of her 2 children, along with short letters."**************
I think I totally know what you mean. It is all very nice that my sister sends me these little letters once a year or so, too. Sounds good at first right? How friggin thoughtful of her. Never mind that she doesnt speak to me the other 364 days of the year. Never mind she doesnt care to know me or my kids or our own mother ( our mom is DF, so she doesnt even get a once a year letter!)
I dont feel any love in these cutesy-pootsy letters. I feel like it is charity. With these little letters once a year she can feel even MORE righteous than she already does. These letters make me want to barf.
Plus it takes like 6 months to get over all the emotional crap that comes up with each letter and just about that time, the NEXT cutesy-pootsy letter comes!
ON THE OTHER HAND, half of me feels really bad about feeling this way, and I would like to be able to open one of those cutesy-pootsy letters and just think, How nice! A letter from my sister! It is good to hear from her, and not have that nauseous feeling.
I think I may be moving toward this because of the post about the latest KM and shunning. When I read that article, I finally accepted that my sister will never, ever, speak to our mom again, and she and I will never have our old relationship back, and it is of no use hoping or waiting or trying to convince her or anything. This is how it is, period.
A few months ago I really let her have it (told her what I thought of her shunning), and I doubt I will be receiving even the once a year letters.
Oh well.
I was trying so hard to keep a relationship with her because I was hoping she would change someday. I was keeping a relationship with a sister I might someday have, not the sister she actually is. Now that I am giving up on the idea of her changing, I am not very sad about loosing the tiny relationship I had with her. The sister she actually is isnt very niceand I wouldnt have had a relationship with her if she werent family.
Funny thing is, she has been doing the same thing keeping a tiny relationship with me because someday I might change and be a JW (in her dreams!), not because of who I am. We have both been living in a dream world.
This limbo, dream world time is so very painful. This time where people stay FAKE FRIENDS, waiting for the magic day when they can be REAL friends again.
I just dont want to do it anymore.
-LisaBObeesa
Edited by - LisaBOBeesa on 3 July 2002 16:38:11
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A NEW SIGN OUT FRONT AT BETHEL!
by Mary ini think it's time bethel got a new sign out front, one that really speaks volumes and is far more suitable to their "read god's word the bible daily.
i was thinking: .
oh what a web we weave, when first we practice to deceive!
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lisaBObeesa
JOIN OR DIE
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11
What are my dreams telling me?
by Billygoat insome of you have heard of my issues at work with some of the characters i work with.
it's got me pretty stressed out.
we had a little "meeting" last week where he wanted to talk to me.
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lisaBObeesa
Billygoat,
Your dreams are telling you to quit your job and become a TEACHER :)
-LisaBObeesa
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Top STUPID criticisms of the WTS
by JanH inthere are certainly enough valid criticisms of the wts and the jw religion, but a significant number of often-repeated criticisms of the religion are, imnsho, just ludicruous and serves to take attention away from the real issues.
significant problems with the wts includes, but are not limited to, the shunning policy, the blood issue and of course the corporate policy of hiding child molestors.. here is a list of criticisms of the wts that i find particularly annoying to see:.
russell was a freemason (or, even worse, the wts is part of some other large-scale conspiracy like the illuminati).
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lisaBObeesa
Thought #1:
JanH said,
Surely the main problem is that there is an organization that makes basically nice people do atrocities. But I cannot agree that this abstains them from responsibility for their own actions. We are all answering for what we do and did, no matter what context we are working in.
I totally agree with this. When I was younger, I did not feel this way. I was raised a JW and honestly felt people were helplessly sucked into a big trap and I just felt sorry for them. I did not hold them responsible for their shunning, etc. Now, of course, I realize each person is responsible for his or her choices. I believe that every JW has had a moment where they did something that they KNEW was wrong (like shunning an old friend), but made a choice to push that thought out of their mind in order to continue being a good JW. But I also hold the Org responsible because they use immoral and unethical methods to convince people to do these thingsThey trick people ... Am I making any sense here?
Thought #2:
JanH,
If I understand you correctly, you are saying that the use of these terms (cult, mind-control, brainwashing) hurts us because it weakens our argument to active JWs. Do I understand you correctly?
If so, I tend to agree with this. Telling a JW they are in a cult is about the stupidest thing a person could say if they are trying to get them out of the org, or even if they just wish to remain on speaking terms with them!
But I also understand you to say that these words dont just hurt our arguments with active JWs, but that they are actually incorrectly used words and we should not use them at all, even when speaking amongst ourselves.
IF I were convinced these words were WRONG and indeed loaded language, I would have to agree with youbut Im not there yet.
What words would be more correct, in your opinion?
I have used the term, dangerous control group. but that is for me just a way to say cult without pissing people off as much. Isnt that a euphemism?
Surely the main problem is that there is an organization that makes basically nice people do atrocities.
What is the word for organizations like this?
-LisaBObeesa
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Top STUPID criticisms of the WTS
by JanH inthere are certainly enough valid criticisms of the wts and the jw religion, but a significant number of often-repeated criticisms of the religion are, imnsho, just ludicruous and serves to take attention away from the real issues.
significant problems with the wts includes, but are not limited to, the shunning policy, the blood issue and of course the corporate policy of hiding child molestors.. here is a list of criticisms of the wts that i find particularly annoying to see:.
russell was a freemason (or, even worse, the wts is part of some other large-scale conspiracy like the illuminati).
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lisaBObeesa
Thank you JanH and everyone else who posted for this interesting thread.
My thoughts:
Repeat the following once in your personal study, once when you study with your family, and once at the meeting on Sunday:
Read paragraph one: We would never speak to apostates!
Question for paragraph one: Would we ever speak to apostates?
Answer to paragraph one: We will never speak to apostates!
They might as well break out the pocket watch to swing before our eyes as they whisper, You are getting sleepy.
I call this mind-control or brainwashing. Maybe there is a better term but this is what I mean, and I think what most people mean, when they say 'mind-control' or 'brainwashing.' Maybe Im wrong
And as for being a cult: they control every minute of your life, who you speak to, what kind of clothes you wear, how you style you hair, what movies you see, what books you read, and how you can think. It is not an exaggeration: they actually control a persons whole life. For a JW t o evade that control takes careful planning amd secrecy. And it usually causes a great deal of fear of being caught, if it can be done at all without getting df (death sentence).
I dont think this is just a religion. I think t his is something more. I think this is a cult that empoys mind-control techinques to indocrinate, control, and keep followers.
-LisaBObeesa
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growing up JW DOES DAMAGE (re-post)
by lisaBObeesa ingood post!
but there are those who stay for other reasons.
even though they know the beliefs and practices are wrong, they cannot bring themselves to pay the price for leaving.
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lisaBObeesa
Thanks everyone for your thoughts...
It might sound crazy, but I really think this is a PLAN. I believe people at the top of the org want to control a bunch of people and they have studied how to do that, and they are very good at it.
Anyway, I went to edit the first post and when I hit submit, the whole post was all messed up! (no spaces between paragraphs, etc... can anyone tell me what I did to mess it up?
Thanks,
-Lisa
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Looking for courage careerwise - venting!
by Billygoat ini'm getting ready to vent, so please bear with me.
i am hoping y'all can give me some solid advice or if nothing else, tell me you love me and wish me the best.
i hate to do this during such a tough economic slow down, but beginning today, i'm looking for a new job.
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lisaBObeesa
Children: I've always wanted to be a teacher. I'm great with kids. They inspire me. They keep me grounded. They teach me many Life lessons without realizing it. Although I don't have the proper education to be a teacher, I have a lot of Life experience that will benefit children. Perhaps I can go back and get my degree? I'll have to go back to waiting tables and living a life of ramen noodles in order to do that. Can I start off a new marriage with such a big life change?
Billygoat,
I am back at school now so that I can be a teacher! I quit my yucky, not fun, great pay, great medical, job and got a job as an instructional aide in a high school and I LOVE IT. You might want to try it yourself instead of waiting tables. I'm 33, and I have only about a years worth of classes done, but I will graduate one day! But while I wait for that day, I have a job I love.
Good luck!
-LisaBObeesa
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Finding out Who you really are
by Sentinel ingood morning everyone,.
i'm very new on here--just "born yesterday", as a matter of fact, but am finding out how wonderful it is to be able to be free to express thoughts and opinions, share ideas, give comfort, and find hope, within "these walls".. i'm going to ask a question, and that is, how long did it take any of you souls out there to find your true self, after leaving jw's?
i was very young when i was first introduced to the studies of jw's.
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lisaBObeesa
Dear Sentinel,
Mostly I just lurk around hereonly posting once in a while. I wanted to thank you for your post and all that you shared. The subject of what it is like to grow up a JW and how it affects a persons development is close to my heart and my own journey. IMO, it often takes us years longer to figure out who we are than the average joe growing up. The saddest part is how some never do find out who they are because they accept the ready made identity imposed on them by the Org.
Psychdigg,
I am guessing that being raised JW is more damaging than being raised in most orthodox religions. I just dont hear about very many other religions where you loose your whole family and all your friends, your relationship with God and your salvation because you decide to read a book by an ex member, or visit a friends church with them, or any number of other normal, healthy decisions a young person might make as they are growing up, learning about the world around them and themselves. I DO hear of this sort of things in cult-ish control groups like scientologistsbut maybe I just have not looked into Orthodox religions enough. I know a lady who is a devout Orthodox Greek and her children had the freedom to grow up normally. I feel JWs teens, taken as a whole (not ALL), do not grow up normally.
I wrote a post about this from a child development perspective quite a while ago, but I cant find it now. Does anyone know if there is an archive of older posts, so that I could link to it? If I find it hiding on my computer someplace, maybe I will repost it.
LisaBObeesa
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when the TRUTH became lies
by hedonistixstar inmy family started to study when i was six years old.
a lady would come to our house and read us a book that had stories about the bible.
as i grew older i grew to like it and then is when i become very advocated to it.
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lisaBObeesa
Wow, Truthseeker,
That is quite a story. Growing up is tough enough without crazy parents..and then to add into the mix a crazy religion...You must be a very, very strong person!
You said,
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"I found what was beyond the truth, what they didn’t want you to see not because it would harm you, but make you wake up, think for yourself, see past the pretty picture they place for you at the beginning to get you in. "
****************************What info did you find that made you 'wake up' as you say? I know when I was 18, I went to the local library and looked up everything written about the New World Translation by scholars. After that trip to the library, my eyes were open!
Thank you for telling your story,
-Lisa