I had one of those moment with my brother who happens to be one of the loco elders. (that was not a typo lol) A few years ago he was telling me how he had to go over the local elders heads straight to the CO to find out why he was not recommended as an elder since he qualified scriptually.
The fact that he had to "do something" different than the "process" was a little addition to my war chest on mentally getting out the Borg. Stories he told me how he went toe to toe with the other elders and how one approvahed him and asked "XXX,.. are you ALWAYS right?" and his glib laughter to me after that was also an additional straws that helped e see that "all is not right with this group"
So after I faded,..we have been having to deal with each other on family matters and we text mostly now and his text are coming off as "little telegrams" in length as if to say " I want to communicate with you as little as possible, you heathen" things like "Thats good. yes I will. I didn't." each line ended with a period. So I dedcided to thank him for being the one that opened my eyes and the eyes of my family to be able to research and showed my appreciation for him being the "Chink in the armor" that woke me up.
NJY