What's the best way to let someone down gently?

ballistic

I'm so used to getting dumped myself, now the situation is reversed I'm not sure what to say. I don't want to do the chicken shit thing and ignore her. I think she is a vulnerable girl. We've only dated a few times, but I'm noticing the less and less interest I show, the more she is contacting me.

Dr Jekyll

but I'm noticing the less and less interest I show, the more she is contacting me.

Ouch, i hope you don't have any pet rabbits

lol

luna2

I don't know if there is a best or kindest way, ballistic. There's the most honest way, I suppose, of telling her straight out that you'd like to date other women. I don't know how to say it in such a way that it doesn't hurt.

This is just a personal preferance, but I don't think I'd want to go out on a final date or anything and have a guy tell me, at the end of a perfectly nice evening, that this was the end. I'd find it humiliating to have thought that we were having a good time together when all he was thinking about was how to get rid of me.

cyberdyne systems 101

Never an easy one is it, I think you can either be very direct and say you see no future in this or when talking to her say things that imply your not intending to settle down and want to go out with different friends and so on. Perhaps you can use some of the let downs that have been used on you in the past?

CS 101

Dr Jekyll

I'm so used to getting dumped myself,

Ok then choose the nicest way you were dumped and do it to her like that.

I was a bit bad when it came to clingy people, I had a nasty experience with a bunny boiler so i tended to be a bit brutal when it came to finishing with people.

luna2

What is a bunny boiler, Dr. J?

ballistic

Hmmm, I'm not sure the nicest way I was let down is appropriate. The nicest way I was let down was by a lovely girl who I respected a lot. She came round and while she stood there, she said, "there's no easy way to say this, but I'm getting back with my ex-boyfriend", then she laid on my bed and undressed and said but I didn't want to leave you without you enjoying this one more time... I'll leave the rest to your imagination.

Dr Jekyll

it comes from that glen close film, fatal attraction. (married) Boy meets girl, boy uses girl so girl becomes psychopath. she breaks into his family home and boils his children's rabbit, leaving it cooking for the family to find.

Thats a bunny boiler.

delilah

then she laid on my bed and undressed and said but I didn't want to leave you without you enjoying this one more time.

Ballistic, excuse me for saying this, but this chick seems a bit into herself....acting like you would never have something SO good again...YUK!

There's no easy way, to tell someone that you'd rather not date anymore. Just be honest. Honesty is the best policy....it may hurt for awhile, but it goes away, and she'll find someone else to date. Sadly, this is part of the dating scene.....oh, how I remember those days.

Good luck.....

luna2

Aaaah, obviously never saw that movie, doc. Having someone go psycho on you would be quite horrible.

Um, ballistic...don't think I'd go the "I'm dumping you, but here's one last f**k as consolation prize" route. My ex pulled that, like I'd never get as good as him again or something. Made me want to punch his lights out.

What's the best way to let someone down gently?

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