by SexyTeen 66 Replies latest jw friends
AjaxMan, I have JW family that is like that, and has always been like that - even when we were 'active' JWs. Hot/Cold all the time. Same deal with JW 'friends' who would turn on you in a heartbeat if they saw some gain (usually social climbing in the JW 'corporate' ladder - currying favor w/ the elders). Then pretend the next week to be your best friends again. What a rollercoaster ride!
SexyTeen, step outa line for one second and you will see just how 'loving' your elders can be.
SexyTeen,
I also like to add from my perspective as a never-was-JW that:
I don't like the two-faced attitude they take with worldly never-was-JW. It is like they are friendly to "worldlings", but cannot be real close as close friends. Why? Because of their doctrine of "Bad Associations..." and to them, the only good association is only with another JW. Correct me if I am wrong, but I love to hear your input on that one.
Thanks.
Ajax
"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things and the best things never die." - The Shawshank Redemption
NameWithheld,
Was your JW family like that with non-JWs?
Ajax
"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things and the best things never die." - The Shawshank Redemption
'Likable misfits' - that's the kindest accurate description I've come across for JWs. It's a place where people can belong and live a whole life in just a slightly different realm to the rest of us, a differnt set of rules for a differnet set of people - not evil, just dealing(high-handedly??) with the difficulties of being differnet and not fitting in (I think).
(Although a small minority do commit acts that are or seem evil)
Enjoy
Thank you all for your sincere answers to my question.
If I may, I would like address some of the comments. Please let me know if I am out of line.
puffsrule: You say JWs destroyed your family because your father was disfellowshipped for smoking. Was it JWs that destroyed your family, or was it your father for smoking?
On your point #1, I was protected also as a child from worldly associations. I wish more parents protected their kids, JWs or not JWs, this would bring down the number of child abuse.
On point #2, I don't mind women being in subjection, this is instructed in the Bible, Jesus is the head of the congregation, and the man is the head of the household. Someone has to drive, can't have two drivers.
#3: I will be going to college next fall.
#4: About Armageddon, well I know the Bible talks about it and I believe the Bible. But you are free to believe that it won't happen.
David Gladden:
Actually don't they turn on you if you brake Biblical laws?
lydia:
Thanks for the advice. I will question some things, but I will do it humbly, for I respect my father and my mother that are JWs. I don't wish to hurt them.
Ajaxman:
I get what you are saying. In a way, you are right.
hillary_step:
I am trying to be objective. Thank you for your encouragement.
Max:
I kind of feel the same way.
Ajax, well, seeing as my JW family doesn't maintain any close contact with any non-JWs I couldn't really say. They pretty much toe the line when it comes to "Bad association". I know that my brother for instance, through his work, could form better friendships, but for example, you'd never catch them having a 'wordly person' over for dinner.
SexyTeen, If I were you I'd stay off the subject of "Protecting the children from child abuse by not allowing association with 'worldly' people". You are just as likely to be abused in the JW religion as you are outside of it. It is NO special protection. Visit www.silentlambs.com if you really want to know what is possible to happen in "Jehovah's clean organization". Just being a JW doesn't garuantee your safety. I'm glad you have not been exposed to this darker side of humanity.
I'm glad you are going to college - good for you. Had you been born 10 or 15 years earlier there IS NO WAY you'd be going to college - if you did you would be viewed like a tottaly 'weak' person.
As for the big "A" - you can think the bible claims this. So does the Koran. Why would you pick one holy book over another? Oh yea, because you were born in the USA. Had you been born in Pakistan you'd be defending the Koran as the 'one book'. And as far a the JW's thoughts as to the big "A", well, it was supposed to be 1914. Then 1915 (or 16). Then 1925. Then in WWII, it was "in a few short months". Then we all know about 1975. And don't forget that it was coming "before the generation of 1914 passed away" - and we know that is not longer "The Truth" anymore. Don't be surprised if the WTBTS tries to create a new date for the big "A".
Fact is, you and I will both grow old and die, just like every other human on the planet - baring of course premature death. Better start that 401K plan now.
Hi SexyTeen!!
Welcome to the board. I was curious about something you posted above. You said:
"puffsrule: You say JWs destroyed your family because your father was disfellowshipped for smoking. Was it JWs that destroyed your family, or was it your father for smoking?"
I understand the point you are trying to make. However, nowhere in the bible does it say, thou shall not smoke. I do understand that god wants us to treat our bodies right, as we belong to him. However, and this is only in my opinion, it is a little far fetched to completely cut somebody off because of this. This is where I think JWs exert too much control over peoples lives and intrude too much into one's personal business. What if puffsrule's father was the perfect Christian, but had a small addiction to smoking? Does this warrent him being cut off from the very people he's loves the most and loosing all favor with god, as the JWs teach? I think that is an imbalanced view point. But again, this only my opinion, and I'm not trying to push my opinion on you. What do think about that issue?
AMarie
Again: Welcome to the board :) It's always nice to see new faces.
And just to elaborate on AMarie's point. In 'normal' families, if a person takes up a habit, say smoking, that the other does not approve of, usually they will come up with a compromise. Like "You smoke outside the house" or similar. Rarely would a couple actaully divorce/seperate over such an issue. So it's pointless to try and pretend that the problem was caused by 'smoking'. The problem was caused by people's reactiong to it - the shunning and subsequent mental anquish that would result to ALL who were close. Notice he said that the smoking was the "catalyst" for the father's leaving - do you think perhaps that a man could become so fed up with being treated as 'dead' in his own home, by close family and (former) 'friends' that he would want to just escape the situation?
While I don't smoke and don't care for it, I cannot imagine Jesus turning up his nose at someone for the habit.
Hello ST, welcome to the board.
I'm just curious as to your thinking regarding treating all kinds of "sins" equally, by disfellowshipping.
For example, most people would agree that there are 'degrees' of wrongdoing, even the Law of the land recognizes this, and gives sentences that it considers to be suitable punishment for the crimes involved.
I find it curious that someone guilty of the "sin" of smoking tobacco is punished with the same severity as someone who is guilty of murder in the first degree.
What it does, is takes something fairly trivial and admittedly a wrong against one's own body and elevates it to the same level as the most heinous crime one can commit against another person. It also has the opposite effect of minimizing and perhaps even trivializing the worst of crimes by treating them the same as a minor infraction.
How do you rationalize and justify that? (I'm not asking you to quote from the WTS publications either.... I'm asking for your opinion, your thoughts.)
Love, Scully
It is not persecution for an informed person
to expose a certain religion as being false. - WT 11/15/63
A religion that teaches lies cannot be true. -WT 12/1/91
To define most JWs as evil is a bit farfetched, but that is not to say that a great many have the personal fortitude to stand up in the face of opressive/backwards thinking. What does this say for thier true moral character? Not much. In this light, the absence of moral character leaves one deficient, which in turn leads to mistreatment of those they claim to love. All in the name of being a part of the org. Evil is as evil does IMHO, such as breaking up families, shunning lifelong friends, demonizing entire groups of people they don't even know, entertaining Paradise on Earth fantasies for generations to no avail, and providing the foundation for years and years of unjustified guilt, is as evil as it gets.
