If the elders are "barring" you from speaking to said sister that might indicate they aren't quite ready to DF you.
How did the meeting end? DF'ing there and then or something else?
Tread carefully and ask away on here.
I'm New
by Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho 209 Replies latest members meetups
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Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho
@freddo You'd think that if this was a genuine, scriptual handling of matters, the elders would encourage me to "settle matters straight" with the pawn they were using to trap me. Expose her lies and manipulation and outright extortion. Point out how dishonest it was for the elders to be USING a member of the congregation to prove what they'd been suspecting for months - that I was awake. They'd actually groomed this sister with specific things to say that would lure me out of my apostate shell. All under the guise of "needing my help" to open her eyes to the real truth. "I need to get out of here. I was told that missing meetings was a decision that would cost my life," she'd confide in me.
But no, settling things straight with her is not allowed. That would err too much on the side of justice.
The meeting ended when I finally reached that tortured stage of crying. You know, mouth frozen in a silent scream, tears streaming down my face, shoulders spazming. Eventually all I could get out were short staccato sobs between the elders berating me.
I excused myself and ran out of there. No conclusion to the meeting. I was in no shape to carry out whatever was left of the discussion. I'm never going back. Never agreeing to any more meetings. Never attending the Kingdom Hall. I don't care what they do from here on out. They can do whatever they like - but it sure as hell will be a long distance away from me.
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doofdaddy
Yep Wake me, I live in NNSW
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jwfacts
The proper approach would be for the sister to speak with you first about what was going on. Rather they used to sister for entrapment instead.
Matthew 18:15,16 "Moreover, if your brother commits a sin, go lay bare his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take along with you one or two more, in order that at the mouth of two or three witnesses every matter may be established."
the sister's lone testament counted as one witness for anything verbal I relayed to her. And her text messages counted as supporting evidence of where my head is at with things. I told the elders those messages were taken out of context. They didn't buy it.
That comment is interesting. The two witness rule for child abuse has not allowed forensic evidence as the second witness, it still needs to be two human witnesses. Yet apostasy is treated like a far worse sin, and here a single witness along with your texts are suddenly fine to be considered as two witnesses. The elders would probably counter that your texts are like a confession, but still, there is no reason that they cannot be as lenient with the interpretation of the two witness rule in the case of protecting children.
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dubstepped
If you're done with them, and you want to have your say with that sister, then do it. They can't truly bar you from talking to her. That's just them on a power trip. Of course, that's up to you. I think that's part of the reason we disassociated. I'm not going out like that. We took control of our destiny at a point. Admittedly, the goal was to fade if possible, but once elders started calling and showing up at our house unannounced, we put a bullet in it all with DA letters. Sorry you're going through this. There are no good ways to do this. They make it have to be ugly.
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Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho
@doofdaddy, if you're not a serial killer, or worse - an elder from my congregation - we should chat!
@jwfacts, Paul - the level of hypocrisy was jaw-dropping. The society will pull a limb straining to find a way to keep its rigid "two witness rule" when it has SO many outs (scriptural ones included!), yet they completely bypass it in this case. Having a critical thinker in their ranks is FAR more harmful to the congregation than a pedophile. They called me "dangerous" for the thoughts I'd expressed in confidence to a sister. Dangerous. Fark. Call the police, then, if I'm that dangerous!
@dubstepped, I don't even think that sister is worthy of a confrontation. She doesn't even deserve any more of my time or resources. She's officially a skidmark in my memory that I'm desperately trying to wipe clean.
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Giordano
I would encourage you to meet with an attorney to explore your legal options........ at least see if any exist for this circumstance. I'd do it sooner then later so as to interrupt whatever they (Elders) have planned for you.
There are times in life when a person, to use street terms.... 'needs to git sum back'.
Why do these guys get to sleep the sleep of innocents? Why does this 'friend sister' get to take your money and help turn you inside out?
You have done everything you could to clarify your position....... but they didn't want to listen.
Now it's time to set your direct involvement aside and see if there is a legal option available. This is an option that the WT Society always prefers over and above any compromise or helpful caring discussions.
It doesn't have to be expensive maybe just the cost of a letter sent to the Elder's and Society. Those Elders are not going to be happy that you Copied the Society with their names and congregation.
You need to let a professional push back......let those Elders spend their nights fretting over a potential costly legal issue and possible dismissal of their 'privileges'.
There has been no doubt from anyone responding to this issue on this forum nor any wavering in our commitment to your situation.
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Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho
@Giordano, hmmmmmm. Anyone got Vincent Toole's number?
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doofdaddy
PM sent Wake Me. Do you know how it works? Should be a 1 up at the top of the page beside your avatar..
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stuckinarut2
Ah yes jwfacts. You correctly quoted the scriptural direction that witnesss are supposed to use. Also that 2 witnesses are required to a matter.
In my case, I never had the accuser approach me, nor did the elders have two witnesses. When I pushed for that, they said "it doesn't apply for serious ,taters like apostasy" and "the sister (my employee) is too timid to speak personally to you"
So yes, the "sin" of apostasy or thinking for yourself is far worse that even child abuse in the societies eyes!