Repressed, Triggered and Recovered Memories

by Big Tex 98 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

• 

  Dawn

  (((((((((Big Tex)))))))) and (((((((((((to other posters with repressed memories)))))))))

  I was amazed at how many here have responded and acknowledged that they also had repressed memories!

  My counselor shared something with me on this area that I wanted to pass along because it made me feel so much better. She said that some people thing that repressed memories are something that is "broken" and has to be fixed. She believes it is quite the opposite - that we were programmed this way to protect ourselves. It is because something so terrible happened to us as a child that if we DIDN'T repress it and become dissociative we would be so broken we could not be repaired. Only when we are in a position to handle the memories and deal with it does our mind begin to let go and we begin to remember.

  This made me feel better because I realized that my repressed memories were not because I was weak in some way or broken in some way - my body was reacting exactly as it had been programmed to do. I have glimpses at times but have not been able to tap into my repressed memories - but I no longer feel like I HAVE to or rush it - my spirit will reveal it when I'm ready to handle it.

  Big Tex - you are so blessed to have such an insightful and loving wife! And I want to thank you for sharing your story because it was so timely for me and helpful.
• 

  asleif_dufansdottir

  Tex, how awful that a small child should be put through that by the people who should protect him with their lives. How wonderful that you have become such a good man in spite of it.

  I think most people, at least in a detached way, know that there are monsters out there. What they find hard to believe, and what is truly terrifying, is that people can't always tell who the monsters are.

  For instance, when confronted with the possibility that someone the person knows and likes, perhaps a family member or a friend, has done such horrendous things, a person must conclude one of two things:
  
  1. You can't trust your judgment - This horribly sociopathic monster had you fooled. (this is a bad feeling)
  
  2. The monster wasn't all bad. The person who could sexually torture a child could be a fun fishin' buddy, or a good employee. I think that's the scariest possibility. That a person who could do such bad things might have good qualities too (not all do, of course!). You hear over and over, especially in small towns, that people just 'can't believe' so-and-so would do such a thing..."I know him, he's a good guy." If we accept that a person who has at least some good qualities could do such horrific things, we also have to accept that we might be capable of doing bad things, too - not necessarily something as awful as child abuse, but something we wouldn't want to believe we'd do...

  It's much easier when the monster has 3 heads and drips saliva off his fangs.
• 

  MegaDude

  Tex,

  A great post. It is impressive to me that you have come so far that you could share this, because I know it will help others. From talking to you I would never have dreamed you had undergone this horrible experience.
• 

  Lady Lee

  The false memory syndrome phenomenon was started by two parents who were accused of abuse by their daughter!!! The parents had a vested interest in destroying her credibility. And a lot of other perpetrators have jumped on the bandwagon.

  WARNING the 3rd quote makes me ill
  
  If you can get your hands on a copy of Betrayal Trauma: The logic of forgetting childhood abuse by Jennifer J. Freyd
  
  on Page 198 she states

  In my own case I lost the ability to choose privacy. Approximately eight months after I first presented betrayal trauma theory, my parents, in conjuction with Ralph Underwager and others, formed the False Memory Syndrome Foundation (FMSF). Before the organization was formed, my mother, Pamela Freyd, had published an article presenting her version of family history under the name "Jane Doe" (Doe, 1991).

  Quote:

  Freyd never went public with her accusations about her family. It was her mother that took a pre-emptive strike and published a sanitized version of what happened.
  
  You might also want to look at page 38 where the above mentionned Underwager when asked "Is choosing paedophilia for you a responsible choice for the individual?" in an interview with Geraci in 1993 stated:

  Certainly it is responsible. What I have been struck by as I have come to know more about and understand people who choose paedophilia is that they let themselves be too much defined by other people. That is usally an essentially negative definition. Paedophiles spend a lot of time and energy defending their choice. I don't think a paedophile needs to do that. _Paedophiles can boldly and courageously affirm what they choose. They can say that what they want is to find the best way to love. I am also a theologian and as a theologian I believe it is God's will that there be closeness and intimacy, unity of the flesh, between people. A paedophile can say: "This closeness is possible for me whithin the choices I have made."

  Quote:

  Another member of the advisory board of FMSF suggested that

  "It would be nice if someone could get some kind of big research grant to do a longitudinal study of, let's say, a hundred twelve-year-old boys in relationships with loving paedophiles. Whoever was doing the study would have to follow them at five-year intervals for twenty years.

  Quote:

  Frankly I feel ill typing that. That they would even suggest allowing this abuse to go on so they could study it is beyond belief
  
  These are the founders of the FMSF
  
  The book by the way is a fascinating read with a lot of insight to repressed memory
• 

  Big Tex

  Thanks for posting this Lady Lee. People need to see what's out there.

  Realize and understand the level of pathology that is out there. Can you imagine 100 12-year old boys being subject to this sort of "test"? The twisting not only logic but of basic human behavior is chilling.
• 

  ashitaka

  "Jehovah is far too busy in heaven to worry about your petty little problems. Your job is get back to meetings and quit feeling so sorry for yourself."

  I know that this thread already has some mileage, but reading this on page one just made me shake my head and close my browser. Came back on later to post this. It's utterly amazing how apathetically cruel some people are.

  ash
• 

  Lady Lee

  Can you imagine 100 12-year old boys being subject to this sort of "test"? The twisting not only logic but of basic human behavior is chilling

  No ethics board would allow it. Thank gawd. But if someone is determined enough they might try it. However it hopefully would never get published in any reputable journal

  It really is too sick and these are the people who are behind the False Memory Syndrome Foundation

  That doesn't mean I don't think false meories are possible. They are. But certainly not in the numbers these people would want us to believe
• 

  SheilaM

  Jes: You have nothing to apologize for hun. Your Father chose to do and say what he did. Quit lumping yourself with his actions, you would never hurt anyone like he did BT.
• 

  Big Tex

  It's utterly amazing how apathetically cruel some people are.

  No. It's amazing how cruel Jehovah's Witnesses can be. I posted this specifically because there are a couple of JW apologists who see nothing wrong with this organization. They very gleefully report on anything positive and oh-so-snobbishly look down at the rest of "evil" apostates who dare to question God's spirit directed organization.

  Tell me again, and again, how loving these people are. For every diatribe, for every pre-programmed little Watchtower saying they spew, only shows to the world how evil this organization truly is.

  Notice how these JW apologists do not comment on this subject.
• 

  Nordic

  To Big Tex

  I am very sad to hear your story, and i hope the best for you and your wife in the furture.

  When you talk with the eldrer's about abuse, you get amazed with ther answers.

  And its a kind of abuse one more time.

  My wife is also dealing with repressed memories, and to hear what she remember, is so heart breaking.

  Nordic