At what?: This Board
Why?: Look around
Yes, people can post what they want. It's a public board. But I often sit back and wonder where people's heads and hearts really are.
When I first came here, I was a lurker. I was still a JW. I came here looking for answers to my questions and doubts. I found that. But only after I dug through the jokes and snide talks. If I wasn't determined and headstrong, I would've quietly backed away back into the JW's and no one would've never known I was here. It takes alot to actually step forward and actualy post. That goes against everything you've been taught and "instructed" to do. And sometimes actually putting your ass on the line. Losing your family, being disfellowshipped. It spills over into your personal life and has real consequences.
It took me a loooooong time to slowly help someone in my family to open up and speak about their doubts. Giving small bits and pieces so as not to give them the feeling I had when the truth about "the truth" was dumped on me. I know that's not the way to do it. I recently started sending links of short articles to read. But they still have questions...
I thought for a bit.... should I? Yes, I did. I sent them here. Although I was hesitant, I went ahead and did so. Afterall, I spent a little over a year getting them to open up more and more.
No, they don't find answers. They find people being grimey and trying to come up with jokes to play on JW's.
They find posts about "What Rumor to start about JW's." with AIDS jokes. Or Christmas pranks to do at the Kingdom halls. And just flat out foolishness that does nothing but throw the JW OFF, get confused, scared and what not and REVERSE. Going right back to square one or NONE. "What scandal/gossip can I dig up today?" "What prank can I pull off.... let's put carved pumpkins in front the KH. Let's decorated the trees.... that'll piss them off." Some of that stuff is just LOW and childish. Why would you even take pleasure in acting like that? Bitterness? Anger? Boredom? Fun? Whatever the case, it becomes so self absorbed that nobody considers who's watching and contemplating. The consideration, decency and common sense has gone down the drain.
There goes the justification to say "Look how they act... I don't want to be an apostate." And they go right back in.
And now it has reflected on me in a bad way....... because I have to say, I was a bit ashamed myself for posting among it.
So now, we have a family member going back to studying with an "annointed" JW, who has spoken about concerns of me and why I'd want to post among people like that. Which leads to me getting the 3rd degree and now having to go up against damn near everybody. No peace. Full stress.
I've come to the conclusion... the negative far outweighs the positive. I'm truly disappointed and sick of half the behavior on this board. There are some nice considerate people here, I must say. But FEW. You know the one's who CONSIDER other people with kindess. Who don't sit around and think up every negative thing to do and say. Who don't think pranks on JW's are funny. Because they keep in mind that it isn't so much the JW themselves, but those at the headquaters/GB who are MISLEADING many people who genuinley believe they are doing the right thing. And they also remember that they were once in THOSE SHOES and know they wouldn't want to be disrespected and joked on. I know I didn't want to be, so therefore I'm NOT going to turn around and do the same thing.
So whatever... this probably means more fights and black eyes for me. And I owe it all to half of ya'll because I was stupid enough for thinking this would be a good place to start for answers and meaningful knowledge to someone who was seeking.... it happens to many others, not just to me. But that's the risk people take I suppose.
This place? Forget it. I don't know who's worse... Judgmental JW's.... or Vindictive Ex-JW's' and the instigators that snitch on the side.