by Nickey 80 Replies latest jw friends
It is the pain within that drives the EXJW to do these things, it is a release, therapy, there way of healing! JW's sarcastically say when they leave the slammed door shaking there head "Well they wont be in the paradise on earth" there little prank on the non JW, yes there redemption is what they think is there salvation.
Beans
Nickey, would you take issue w/the picketers outside Kingdom Halls? Or in front of Brooklyn? What constitutes a prank? Leaving a slientlamb on a KH door with a little note about protecting the children? You are just as right as about doing violence or vandalism as sens is about having a place to fantasize about it. If that helps her get out her bad feeling and it stays at that, then I say good for her. Yes this is not a perfect place, but then again niether are any dubs that run accross this board and I would even go so far as to say a bit over dramatic (self righteous) about the things they see here and only wished were free enough to say, argue over 1914, or address child molestation with some real rage. Nope...just go to meetings and head toward the spiritual trough...much better than perhaps hashing out your feelings with 6000+ people who just might have a clue what you are feeling. Different people rich with experience, rage, some hate, lots of love, attitudes, friends, enemies, fresh perspectives, a myriad of topics, etc. You have to take the good with the bad, after all no one promised you a paradise on earth....*LOL*....Have a good evening everyone.
Sincerely,
District Overbeer
Nickey,
Everyone is different. You say you were never baptized because you never agreed or believed what was being taught. Well that alone is going to make you a 'different' kind of EXjw today than say for example, someone who was very strongly involved raised their children in it, served at bethel, pioneered for years, and THEN found out that it was all a big fraudulent lie. They get df'd and lose any contact with their children..grandchildren perhaps and any friend they have ever had over the last 50 years. You havent woken up after a lifetime of being in a mental prison.
Please dont judge someone for being angry at the religion..dont judge someone for being bitter and dont even judge someone who HATES the JW's. Just sit back and think maybe they have a reason for how they feel. Once you learn to stop judging you will be way better than most people.
When you see a post of ANTI JW jokes or a mean spirited post about the JW's try clicking on that posters name and checking out some of what they have posted about themselves. Were they sexually or physically abused at the hands of a JW? Was their child stolen from them by an ex spouse who used the watchtowers lawyers to find them an unfit parent? Did they spent their entire life dedicated to the religion only to find out in their twilight years that their life has been lived in a cult? WHY are they angry?
I think if you think about it a little might agree that you dont understand why there is anger and hatred simply because YOU dont have a reason to feel it.
flower
Picketers and leaving Silent Lambs on the doors... that is done out of love and concern for others. I believe Bill's approach is the same as leaving watchtowers and tracts on people's doors and then leaving.
Picketers are a little more outspoken in their approach. Some go too far. But for the most part, they stick to a plan of getting a message out. And they go out there trying to reach people.
Pulling pranks and harrassing people? Is not. It's self absorbed and centered around wanting revenge. "If I can hurt someone as much as I hurt... I'll feel better." Which is false. That is not truly healing and healthy therapy and I wouldn't sit by and encourage someone to do that.
It's kind of hypocritical for some people to suggest to read Ray Franz Book "Crisis of Conscience" and "In Search of Christian Freedom" when that's the very thing he speaks of...
And flower...
Please don't accuse me of judging... I have many reasons to be angry. MANY. You don't know my history and that I do relate to many because I've gone through the same things. But I choose not the HATE. And that is never the answer. And I'm not going to sit by and excuse and encourage someone to seek revenge. I try to be a POSITIVE influence. Not sitting by telling them it's right to lash out... maybe in the beginning... I've had a period where I wanted to. But to go in circles and dwell on it everyday.... no. It's self destructive.
You only make yourself sick dwelling on negativity. I only started feeling better and more free when I learned to Relax, Relate and Release.... and it ain't easy.
XJW or not, every adult is responsible for their actions, and responsible for dealing with their pain in a responsible way. I get so tired of being asked to be understanding of somebody's pain and hurt "driving them" to act in a certain way. Grow up! Being non-judgemental is good, but making excuses for people who choose to trap themselves in hateful, victimized thinking is not. If you want therapy, great, get therapy, but don't pretend that talking smack on the internet is a replacement.
BTW, Nickey, that makes you 100% responsible for posting. Your observations about some posters were accurate, but your blaming them (even partially) for your actions is irresponsible.
I got some bad, bad news a few days ago - the kind many here would react to by wanting to beat the living hell out of the criminal sicko involved. I didn't take it out on anyone on the internet, and I didn't go beat the hell out of the sicko - I went to the gym and beat the hell out of the heavy bag, and I talked to a frend who's a therapist, and I proivately journaled about how I was feeling, and I will see my regular shrink on my regular day. I could have taken it out on other people - it may be perfectly understandable, but it sure as hell ain't responsible.
Peace out.
I agree with ya. Holding onto hate isnt healthy. But feeling hate is an expected and understandable emotion to feel after going through these kinds of things. Everyone who gets healthy will have to let go of the hate eventually.
But we who are already past it dont have the right to tell someone who is just going through it that they need to get over it faster than they are able to. We cant take that emotion away from someone who is trying to heal. We are all in different phases at the same time here. Some are just starting to get angry, some are depressed, some are scared. We cant speed up anyones progress through any of the phases..all we can do is offer support to everyone.
Phantom, I dont excuse hurting someone else if you were referring to my post. But feeling angry at jw's and expressing it to a certain extent is acceptable and necessary behavior. Nobody goes and beats the hell out of the criminals who run the watchtower organization.
Phantom,
I take full responsibility for my actions. It was a mistake I made because I acted on assumption...
But I still have the right to speak out... and that's what I did. Without pranking or harrassing. I spoke out how I felt and released my anger.... but I always try to end it on a positive note.
Freedom hurts. Things get said, statements get made, verbally or otherwise - the nonverbal declaration of eternal contempt voiced by urinating on a Kingdom Hall can speak volumes about a person's viewpoint.
It might not be the most effective tactic for getting people out of the Borg... but we aren't an army, and we don't have a unified statement to make, nor any reason to organize. Ultimately, everybody is free. Always and everywhere, everyone is free to do what they choose.
The whole point of getting out of the Borg is to be free to piss on a Kingdom Hall if you want. To not be scared of Armageddon. To prove that God is not some trigger happy maniac with a lightning gun.
Lastly, WE DON'T OWE THE DUBS ANYTHING! Why should we put ourselves out, bend over backwards, pretend to be who we aren't, in order to try to "win them over?" If they want freedom, all they have to do is reach out and take it, accepting the painful consequences of such freedom. If they are so frightened by what they see on this board that they run trembling back into their warm cultic cocoon, then how will they EVER handle being out in the world? This board has some characters on it, but most of the people here are MUCH nicer than some of the cretins I've run across since I've been out (and while I was still in, for that matter). If you tell them you were offended by something they said, most of them apologize for offending you, or try to rephrase what they said. That's pretty much the essence of civilized conversation, and all you can ask of somebody. To ask them to hold back for fear of "stumbling" someone who is new, well, I say, screw the newbie and let them learn the hard way. It's the fastest.
I say, let freedom ring. Pee on the Kingdom Hall if you want. Shocking, maybe, but better than the awestruck "God built this drywall tinderbox" dubstyle of conformity that demands silence instead of honesty. If they have honest questions, they can find the answers here. I see no reason to sugarcoat the products of freedom, the brutal opinions and complete ability to state one's mind without fear.
CZAR
